"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

anti-flake technique for online chick?

P

poohead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
Location
Chicago, IL
yesterday i saw this one girl from a dating site that i always thought was cute and messaged her. we exchanged some messages about movies and amusement parks, then i ask her if she would like to go out for coffee sometime? she emails me back 'SURE! IS WED OR THURS BETTER FOR YOU?' - i email her that wed is better for me, and to call me (then i leave her my number). she tells me that she will call me tomorrow (it's today now). she hasn't called yet - and i see she has logged on and off already today. is there anything i can do at this point to avoid the flake/blow off?
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

M

Macgyver

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 23, 2006
Messages
222
Reaction score
1
Not necessarily you're screwed.

Email her quick and say something came up that you can't make it. Get her number and then try to build rapport before even asking her on a date.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

P

poohead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
Location
Chicago, IL
well, she still flaked. no call.
unless she meant 'i'll call you later' as in, not tonight. i hate this type of behavior.
 
M

micams

Don Juan
Joined
Aug 4, 2003
Messages
23
Reaction score
0
To poolhead

Hi poohead.
I call u later in woman language = "I'm OK that u call me".
Why won't u call her? It's a test she wants to see if u have the balls to do it as she senses that u are a little on the shy side, even if she proposes to call u(in that case, it's highly likely that she will NOT call u), better to reassure her in ur masculinity by saying "No thanks, I will call u".
This exact situation happened a long time ago for me, I managed it as I'm advising u right now and I had one of the better LTR of all my life ;-)
 
P

poohead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
Location
Chicago, IL
i never got her number - i just gave her mine.

i sent her this message, i'm not sure if this is a dj thing to say but here's the message i sent her:

you didn't call last night. it's really annoying when people don't do what they say they will. don't bother calling anymore.
Click to expand...
should i have sent that? i'm tired of not calling girls on their annoying flakey behavior. they fcking lie about everything.
 
S

StrongBad

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2003
Messages
34
Reaction score
0
Location
New Jersey
HTML: 
you didn't call last night. it's really annoying when people don't do what they say they will. don't bother calling anymore.
You let her know that she got to you and upset you.

Unless your objective was to truly have her not be interested in you anymore, this was a bad move.
 
P

poohead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
Location
Chicago, IL
not putting up with second class behavior anymore. more men should do the same and then we wouldn't have to deal with all the crap women dish out all the time in dating.

i thought part of being a dj was to be able to walk away at any time, and respect yourself first and not put up with bad behavior from anyone. i don't really care if she calls. she had her chance.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

S

StrongBad

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2003
Messages
34
Reaction score
0
Location
New Jersey
poohead said:
i thought part of being a dj was to be able to walk away at any time, and respect yourself first and not put up with bad behavior from anyone. i don't really care if she calls. she had her chance.
Click to expand...
It is. If you don't care about her anymore then just do that...walk away. No need to make a fuss or even tell her that you're done with her, because that shows she upset you enough to cause you to get some sort of revenge, however small it may be.
 
P

poohead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
Location
Chicago, IL
it's weird how women lie all the time about little things like this - i'll call, or they flake out on a date - these are lies. and yet if you lie when you're in a relationship with them, about anything - the last girl i was with would not let it die that i lied about seeing 'walk the line' - they will never let you forget it. the double standard is just ridiculous.
 
S

StrongBad

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2003
Messages
34
Reaction score
0
Location
New Jersey
poohead said:
it's weird how women lie all the time about little things like this - i'll call, or they flake out on a date - these are lies. and yet if you lie when you're in a relationship with them, about anything - the last girl i was with would not let it die that i lied about seeing 'walk the line' - they will never let you forget it. the double standard is just ridiculous.
Click to expand...
To be fair, "I'll call you" could indeed be woman-speak for "I'm not going to call you". That's why it was mentioned upthread by someone that you should be the one getting the number and calling her. The vast majority of women expect this and want this out of the man. They want you to initiate. By putting the ball in her court you might have caused her interest to dwindle.

No worries, though. Just keep it in mind for next time. It sounds like this girl wasn't that big of a deal to begin with.
 
logicallefty

logicallefty

Moderator
Joined
Apr 26, 2006
Messages
6,000
Reaction score
5,151
Age
52
Location
Northeast Florida, USA
poohead said:
i never got her number - i just gave her mine.

i sent her this message, i'm not sure if this is a dj thing to say but here's the message i sent her:

you didn't call last night. it's really annoying when people don't do what they say they will. don't bother calling anymore.

should i have sent that? i'm tired of not calling girls on their annoying flakey behavior. they fcking lie about everything.
Click to expand...
Little harsh on the words there poohead, but I agree with your goal there 100%. You were trying to tell her you ain't gonna take her ****, and like you said in your other post, more men need to do this..

I have been in this situation before, and what I did was say "Hey! I didn't hear from you last night.. You were prolly tied up and that worked out well because I was too. My good friend Sarah (make up some chicks name) is going through a divorce right now, having a hard time, and needed to talk to me. I'll talk to you later then! :)" (hmm, see, now shes wondering if Sarah is going to be a threat to her, rut row)..

After this, dont call her.. Let her wonder whats up with you, and if she is even remotely interested in you at all, you will hear from her soon! ;-)
 
P

poohead

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 21, 2006
Messages
254
Reaction score
1
Location
Chicago, IL
my inner game needs a lot of work. i'm quick to give people a piece of my mind, then i regret it later. i have to work on being cool and developing my observing ego
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

Read more...

logicallefty

logicallefty

Moderator
Joined
Apr 26, 2006
Messages
6,000
Reaction score
5,151
Age
52
Location
Northeast Florida, USA
Well you are a good man for being able to see your weaknesses and admit them.. Kudos for that..

I say this in all honesty, and I am not affiliated in any way; the best advise i can give you or anyone about improving their game is simply to go to sosuave.com and READ READ READ. The more you read there, the better your game will get. I speak from experience and speak with results. ;-)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top