"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Another Example of a Guy Who Did Not Qualify His Woman

diplomatic_lies

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I've noticed while most guys here are blaming the woman or calling the man an AFC, nobody has actually offered any sympathy to the baby...
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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penkitten said:
wouldnt a righteous man just take his own child out of it and divorce her quietly
and quickly?
I think what you are describing was called a "father" at one time. My gut (and a little cynicism) tells me that this guy is just "her baby's daddy."
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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diplomatic_lies said:
I've noticed while most guys here are blaming the woman or calling the man an AFC, nobody has actually offered any sympathy to the baby...
I thought that would go without saying.
 

Vulpine

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
I thought that would go without saying.
The expression "better off dead" came to mind.

For a moment I entertained the notion that the h0 was trying to do the kid a favor.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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Vulpine said:
The expression "better off dead" came to mind...
Sad yet possibly true in a morbid kind of way.

I think that the most radical idea I have which actually tests my (ehem) moral convictions is the idea to require people to have a license in order to have children. As much as I dislike government intervention into personal matters, I can't help feel that quite a few people should not be allowed to have children while others need to have marital and parental counseling prior to conceiving. I believe that many people believe that they should have children in a manner that's similar that many guys feel the need to pay for dinner and a movie on the first date or buy a chick a drink in a club.
 

Vulpine

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Sad yet possibly true in a morbid kind of way.
See, you thought of the environment and future the kids are facing too, didn't you?

I couldn't help but to shake my head at the neglect, misery, and bleak future these kids are facing. The home doesn't exactly like a loving nuturing one when the mom is a swinger having welfare babies.

"What do you mean, 'get a job'? I have one! And I'm about to get promoted!" *points at swollen belly*
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Vulpine said:
See, you thought of the environment and future the kids are facing too, didn't you?
Absolutely. People are having children mostly because they can and seldom because they want to. Of course I'm talking about people who aren't in an established, committed relationship. It's not commonplace to come across couples who are rushing into marriage who aren't pregnant already.
 

djbr

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Absolutely. People are having children mostly because they can and seldom because they want to. Of course I'm talking about people who aren't in an established, committed relationship. It's not commonplace to come across couples who are rushing into marriage who aren't pregnant already.
This is especially true in my country, where some women have ten children in order to get government support.

It may be perceived as an authoritarian measure, but it's necessary. People have children they can't care and/or provide for, and that makes a mess in the whole society.
 

penkitten

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
I think what you are describing was called a "father" at one time. My gut (and a little cynicism) tells me that this guy is just "her baby's daddy."
i remember when i was small, fathers were fathers and not just baby daddies.
however, back then, mothers were mothers and didn't swing their kids like bats at their baby daddies.
i say both of them should loose their rights to these children.
it goes without saying for her because of what she did.
however, this guy had to know she was nuts by then, and this is probally not the first time she hurt one of the kids. this makes him part of the neglect and abuse in my opinion.
her parents have these children right now, but how did they raise this woman?
did they teach her these actions were ok?
perhaps they are not to blame, since we can only teach our children to grow and be good people and hope they do ok, since we can not hold their hands and walk through life with them once they are grown, but the reality is , they probally did stuff like this to her when she was little too.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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penkitten

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diplomatic_lies said:
I've noticed while most guys here are blaming the woman or calling the man an AFC, nobody has actually offered any sympathy to the baby...
i did on page one where i said poor kid.
i hope this child doesnt have to endure any more of this crap, because children just do not deserve to endure abuse.
perhaps when this child grows up, they will fight for children's rights or fight child abuse, its hard to say.
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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djbr said:
This is especially true in my country, where some women have ten children in order to get government support.

It may be perceived as an authoritarian measure, but it's necessary. People have children they can't care and/or provide for, and that makes a mess in the whole society.
A few years ago we were finding generations of families who were collecting government aid as their sole means of income. There would sometimes be three generations of families living in the same house, all collecting aid.

They complained that the assistance that they were receiving wasn't enough to take care of their large families. They would get upset when someone suggests that it may be easier for them if they stopped having children until they could find a job and earn a better income.

They said it was their constitutional right to have as many children as they wanted, when they wanted. Perhaps, but I didn't see the part in the constitution that said that everyone else had to support them with our taxes... :rolleyes:
 

penkitten

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Francisco d'Anconia said:
Perhaps, but I didn't see the part in the constitution that said that everyone else had to support them with our taxes... :rolleyes:
this is what i deal with every day at work (hud apartment complex)
and i battle with this everyday.
everyday when im working hard to support my children, i see every jane doe living there, just having more and more babies and collecting more aide.
that aide comes out of my paycheck taxes too.
so i feel like i am helping to support their family to lay on their asses while i beat my ass in the ground trying to get by, and since i work and have gotten remarried, i dont qualify for any help at all. before i got remarried, i qualified for some help, but not all the help that is out there, because i have a job.

this would always make me feel weird because the ones that are working, trying to get outta the hole, and have better lifes, do not qualify for half the entitlements to aide that someone who lays on their ass qualifies for.
im sorry but it still doesnt make sense to me.
 

diplomatic_lies

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Well the government could take over raising kids. All children would be raised in government facilities, bred from test tubes. Of course kids won't understand the meaning of love, but hey, gotta make sacrifices. We will create the ultimate society and conquer the world!ahahahahahahahahahhahshudsiojfsd!!!!!
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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diplomatic_lies said:
Well the government could take over raising kids. All children would be raised in government facilities, bred from test tubes. Of course kids won't understand the meaning of love, but hey, gotta make sacrifices. We will create the ultimate society and conquer the world!ahahahahahahahahahhahshudsiojfsd!!!!!
Wasn't that the premise of the show Jessica Alba starred in, Dark Angel?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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diplomatic_lies

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Dunno, I got the idea from Huxely's "Brave New World". Its a great book, about a Utopian society where everyone is happy and satisfied, but complex emotions like love and care are illegal.
 

THE_ADDMAN

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did anyone notice that the guy was named "Deangelo"?

coincidence? ;)
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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THE_ADDMAN said:
did anyone notice that the guy was named "Deangelo"?

coincidence? ;)
Do-Dee-Doo-Doo, Do-Dee-Doo-Doo, oooooooEEEEEOooooo..... :nervous:
 

mpimpin

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diplomatic_lies said:
Dunno, I got the idea from Huxely's "Brave New World". Its a great book, about a Utopian society where everyone is happy and satisfied, but complex emotions like love and care are illegal.

I recognized your first post immediately. This is a great book and I envy the society it created.
 
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