Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

Read more...

another 2nd "date" question

thirdtimescharm

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 14, 2007
Messages
314
Reaction score
9
First meeting was a sleepover...great fun, but leaving room for more. Attration level high. Good contact since, so it's gone beyond one-night stand.

Tomorrow night, I am supposed to attend a friend's birthday dinner.

Is it appropriate to invite her to attend with me? Honestly, I'd probably rather just go be anywhere alone with her, and considering our first time together was a trip straight back to my apartment, I'm not feeling the "dinner with friends" is the right direction just yet.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

Andy_Dufresne

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 18, 2008
Messages
222
Reaction score
10
Location
NorthEast
Hey..I think your gut has provided you with the answer.
 

thirdtimescharm

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 14, 2007
Messages
314
Reaction score
9
Yea Andy, you are right. I'm just torn on how to best make our next rendezvous happen.
 

thirdtimescharm

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 14, 2007
Messages
314
Reaction score
9
As much as I might get taken to task for this, I emailed her in a fairly light tone, without saying when, that I wanted to get together again. Her response was definite: she said she will call me tomorrow to make a plan, and would like to hang out again.

Now, I don't think this is a bad thing since it will be a chance for her to prove herself to me. If she calls, she shows that she does what she says. If she doesn't, it's an easy "next."
 

thirdtimescharm

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Dec 14, 2007
Messages
314
Reaction score
9
The good news is that this woman did call me as advertsied and we saw each other again last night. She attended a show last night with friends, while I went to a street fest on my own but ended up running into a bunch of people I know. And then later in the evening, she texted me and she came to the bar where I was, and life is good.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

Read more...

Top