"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Activities for learning leadership skills beyond relationships

jhonny9546

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 17, 2024
Messages
2,623
Reaction score
552
Location
Italy
What activities and real-life experiences have given you the ability to be in control, demonstrate leadership, and lead others?

Some examples include being a reliable guide that others depend on for trips or nights out, being validated, and having others ask for permission when they are unsure about something.

Maybe it could involve being a coach or a teacher of something. I'm interested in hearing about your experiences.

ps: The leadership thing learned "outside" your LTR or Marriage, will improve your skills inside of it, and any other Relationship
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

DarwinTaurus

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2022
Messages
451
Reaction score
216
Age
49
Location
Darwin, Australia
Nearly ten years ago, I was summoned to be on a jury. I was actually chosen to sit on two trials. The first one was a bit of an eye opener, as it was a new experience for me.

When I was selected as a jury member on the second trial, another member of the jury was also from the first trial, and I honestly thought he was a bit of a moron. So, the first time we were all in the Jury Room, and started to get to know each other, I took charge, and said I was willing to be Jury Foreman, which was accepted by the rest of the group. I was well accustomed to attending meetings in a business setting, and had acted as Chairman a number of times, so was willing to take that skill and use it in the Jury setting. The main reason was I knew I had the capability to keep discussion flowing smoothly and freely, without everyone interrupting each other.

I know my example isn't something you can proactively choose, however, my main point is when you are in a situation where you think you can take charge and make a difference... well go for it. Sometimes the only way to learn leadership skills, is to throw yourself into it. Try, and learn as you go, and treat every mistake as a learning opportunity.
 

jhonny9546

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 17, 2024
Messages
2,623
Reaction score
552
Location
Italy
I know my example isn't something you can proactively choose, however, my main point is when you are in a situation where you think you can take charge and make a difference... well go for it. Sometimes the only way to learn leadership skills, is to throw yourself into it. Try, and learn as you go, and treat every mistake as a learning opportunity.
Exposure is everything.


I want this message to be read by everyone in this forum because it addresses the main source of disagreements and misunderstandings many of us have: the correct way to behave when someone disrespects us, or when we need to assert ourselves.

You see, it's really subtle, but doing it correctly makes a huge difference.
Depending on how you handle this situation, you will come across as either a "pissed off" beta or an "assertive" alpha. I know it's not easy, as there are many approaches and the topic is quite fragmented. So, one way to gauge if we've done it correctly is by observing the reactions of the person we're interacting with. I was referring to Rosenberg's "Nonviolent Communication" as the default method, but it seems that a different approach might be needed here.

We need concrete examples, voice recordings, or better yet, videos to properly understand how to do the most important things that will earn us respect in life: setting boundaries when necessary, or making others aware that they have crossed the line by warning them cautiously.

People are not so lucky to have this skill at their fullest potential yet, or they haven't practice it at all
 

eli77

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 7, 2013
Messages
2,704
Reaction score
595
Location
Miami fl
Comes in handy take it from someone who had a fear of public speaking:)
 

DarwinTaurus

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 18, 2022
Messages
451
Reaction score
216
Age
49
Location
Darwin, Australia
Comes in handy take it from someone who had a fear of public speaking:)
When I worked at the head office of Coles Myer, one of the largest retail conglomerates in Australia, there was an "Effective Speaking Club" that met once a week or so, during lunchtime. This was supported by management, although the club was quite small, perhaps a couple of dozen people. I too had a fear of public speaking, and I would still get nervous if I had to. Like my previous post, this was another case of being proactive, even if you feel uncomfortable.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

Read more...

jhonny9546

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 17, 2024
Messages
2,623
Reaction score
552
Location
Italy
To add to the role of leadership, given that workplace or romantic relationship, or just your life in general, wikipedia has some great infos about the difference btw "transational" and "transformative" leadership.

Many of the post here refer that using a transational approach will get better for relationship with women.
While transformative is what should be used instead, if you aim to "bigger" things in life.


Could you relate?
 

Travel memoir21

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 20, 2020
Messages
2,026
Reaction score
1,153
Age
40
Location
Rio Grande Valley, Texas
I'm thinking of coaching little league kids basketball coach sometime or maybe volunteer. That would be a great way to start learning some basic leadership skills by coaching a few kids.
 

Divorced w 3

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 20, 2022
Messages
3,887
Reaction score
2,554
What activities and real-life experiences have given you the ability to be in control, demonstrate leadership, and lead others?

Some examples include being a reliable guide that others depend on for trips or nights out, being validated, and having others ask for permission when they are unsure about something.

Maybe it could involve being a coach or a teacher of something. I'm interested in hearing about your experiences.

ps: The leadership thing learned "outside" your LTR or Marriage, will improve your skills inside of it, and any other Relationship
Working in a first class, world caliber organization and watching, learning and humbling one’s self
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

Top