Lonsome man
New Member
There's a girl i really like but I don't know if she likes me in the same way I do. So how can I find out if she does, but I think she knows I like her like that.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
please tell me you are jokingOriginally posted by LikRetsam
Omg! You too?! I can relate man, I have this same exact problem.
Ok so we haven't been friends in awhile but I haven't ever stopped thinking about her. I mean, I try to do everything she wants and make her happy but I'm still not sure if she likes me. I think I'm gonna go tell her how I feel about her so she can tell me how she feels about me. I can't stop touching myself in class when I am reminded of her (even numbers look like her nice ass). Every time we talk I have this wierd feeling in my chest like I'm blocked and can't breathe or something. She's intoxicating. Wow, what a girl! We've only gone on dates in my head so far but soon we'll have a real one and I'll listen to all her guy problems and show that I am a sensitive caring guy.
Do you feel the same?!!?
Did you really have to ask?Originally posted by check_mate_kid_uk
please tell me you are joking
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
lolOriginally posted by LikRetsam
Omg! You too?! I can relate man, I have this same exact problem.
Ok so we haven't been friends in awhile but I haven't ever stopped thinking about her. I mean, I try to do everything she wants and make her happy but I'm still not sure if she likes me. I think I'm gonna go tell her how I feel about her so she can tell me how she feels about me. I can't stop touching myself in class when I am reminded of her (even numbers look like her nice ass). Every time we talk I have this wierd feeling in my chest like I'm blocked and can't breathe or something. She's intoxicating. Wow, what a girl! We've only gone on dates in my head so far but soon we'll have a real one and I'll listen to all her guy problems and show that I am a sensitive caring guy.
Do you feel the same?!!?
Ask her out as soon as possible. The longer you wait, the greater her chance of losing interest.Originally posted by Lonsome man
There's a girl i really like but I don't know if she likes me in the same way I do. So how can I find out if she does, but I think she knows I like her like that.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Whoa buddy, you're going in circles here.Originally posted by Lonsome man
There's a girl i really like but I don't know if she likes me in the same way I do. So how can I find out if she does, but I think she knows I like her like that.
you beat me to itOriginally posted by Interpol
Did you really have to ask?