There's an iconic image in art, of a man and a woman standing together. The woman is focused on the man, and clings to his side with both arms. The man is focused outward, toward the danger...the elements, the task, his odyssey. This is the single most iconic image of man and woman's relationship to each other. The relationship is not something for the man to worry over; that's her odyssey..
This is why your focus should never be on your relationship. If it is, you will experience state friction and express a distorted version of yourself eventually.