That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Totally agree. If you eat clean 80-90% of the time you'll be ok.Espi said:
Shows it's all in the head.speakeasy said:
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I've been able to stop drinking soda because of the new flavored, no calorie, bottled waters that are out. I've found one that taste like Dr. Pepper and another that taste like Sprite, all is good with the world. As for my chocolate fix, I've found 90 calorie, 3g of carbs fudge pops that taste like a Wendy's Frosty (on a stick). Now I just need to find a substitute for Jelly Belly jelly beans...speakeasy said:
Yeah, I've heard about them too but after spending a few months researching it I hadn't found any substantial evidence of any of it being harmful. I wasn't searching Wikipedia either, I've checked with the AMA, NMA and the BMA. There hasn't been enough time to gather substantial information for an accurate study. I'll put it like this, there's more substantiated information about the bad additives they put into sports drinks. Oh well, we're all eventually die some day...speakeasy said:
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.