“Are you up” text

[BJP1991]

Been on 2 dates with a girl - lots of making out and touching but no sex yet.

After our second date last night, dropped her off around midnight and went to bed. Woke up and saw she texted me at 4am, asking “Are you up?”

How do you interpret this? Like she wanted to see me again late at night for presumably a booty call?

I replied this morning, saying I was asleep. She replied right away as if nothing was new and asked me about my morning, etc. As if she never had texted in the first place.


Part of me genuinely wants to know why she was texting me. Did she want a BootyCall or was it because she had something on her mind to discuss? Either way - do you ever ask the girl why she would do this or just sweep it under the rug and forget about it/continue going on dates and escalating things physically?

Stupid question, but should I even ask her about what she meant by texting me that?

 

[Prettyboy Dee]

Your 28 years old, has this never happened to you before?

It doesn't mean anything, she probably couldn't sleep and was wondering if you were up so she can text or call you. Dont make nothing into something

 

[BJP1991]

I think she was simply thinking of you.

Think nothing of it, ask her out again, and escalate.

Hear ya. That’s what I plan on doing - she’s been texting me this morning quite a bit already so will probably just ask her out again via text today for sometime this week.

I’ve tried to escalate more and more as the dates go on. She’s being receptive but part of me wonders if she’s trying to get me for the “long run” - meaning a LTR. Which I’m not opposed to with a girl like her.


To the other responder, yeah it’s happened before. Just not with any girls I haven’t already been sexual with - usually is from women I’ve already been there with before, not ones who haven’t yet.

 

[BJP1991]

Hear ya. That’s what I plan on doing - she’s been texting me this morning quite a bit already so will probably just ask her out again via text today for sometime this week.

I’ve tried to escalate more and more as the dates go on. She’s being receptive but part of me wonders if she’s trying to get me for the “long run” - meaning a LTR. Which I’m not opposed to with a girl like her.


To the other responder, yeah it’s happened before. Just not with any girls I haven’t already been sexual with - usually is from women I’ve already been there with before, not ones who haven’t yet.

Furthermore, just confirming that this isn’t the only girl I’ve been on dates with lately. So it isn’t like she’s the only one on my radar

 

[BJP1991]

She gave you status by texting you at 4 a.m. If you ask why you will give it right back.

The reason was to see if you were awake. The reason behind the reason is for her to see what kind of dude she's dealing with. Lucky for you, you were asleep. Don't bother trying to guess rationales behind their silliness. Do monitor your responses and their frequency.

Yeah I’ve been keeping the balance and she does initiate more texts than I do, typically. I’m always cheerful/charming when she texts me and I never do any double texting or anything like that.

Is that what you mean by “monitoring”?

 

[FJA]

Girls can be emotional without any reason which has nothing or less to do with you and than start doing these kind of stupid things, like texting in the middle of the night.

About 2 dates without s*x, this happened to me last years twice. What I did, I wrote her (2 girls, some months in between when I met them) when making an appointment for next date.....ok, 3. appoinment, so I´m going to b*ng you, totally directly like this (of course in my language, Dutch). From both I didn´t here for some days, can ben even a week or two for one girl as far as I can remember. Than, both agreed! And I b*nged them! So, be the bad boy, if theres no s*x at the 2. date, make things clear like this. The result can be negative, she can even be angry, I know, that was also my risk, but at least you tried and you don´t waste your time with dating without s*x. I´m not a 6-pack-build man, totally normal, even for me it worked.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Been on 2 dates with a girl - lots of making out and touching but no sex yet.

After our second date last night, dropped her off around midnight and went to bed. Woke up and saw she texted me at 4am, asking “Are you up?”

How do you interpret this? Like she wanted to see me again late at night for presumably a booty call?

I replied this morning, saying I was asleep. She replied right away as if nothing was new and asked me about my morning, etc. As if she never had texted in the first place.


Part of me genuinely wants to know why she was texting me. Did she want a BootyCall or was it because she had something on her mind to discuss? Either way - do you ever ask the girl why she would do this or just sweep it under the rug and forget about it/continue going on dates and escalating things physically?

Stupid question, but should I even ask her about what she meant by texting me that?

If you want almost guaranteed sex on date 2 invite the girl over for dinner and cook for her. I'm 3 for 3 this month on 2nd dates with that.

 

[FJA]

If you want almost guaranteed sex on date 2 invite the girl over for dinner and cook for her. I'm 3 for 3 this month on 2nd dates with that.

But maybe more important, touch them, women know what this means.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

But maybe more important, touch them, women know what this means.

They also know why they are coming over for dinner and if they do its because they are OK with fvcking you.

 

[FJA]

What I learned: always care less than she cares, always be less nice than she is. Otherwise, she sees you as a nice guy, this is not attractive for her, s*xually.

 

[2Rocky]

if you get a text like that from a girl you are seeing about the time the bars close,she is drunk and horny.

 

[biggoal]

MAybe she wants to know if you wake up early. I went on an OLD date with a girl who is a VERY early am person. Like wakes up at 445 everyday to workout before school (teacher.) she texted me once like 6am asking if I was up and how it's important to be a morning person and get stuff done. total sh** test to see if I was awake. A qualifier.

 

[MrWood]

MAybe she wants to know if you wake up early.

nope, that is not why... not once, ever.

 

[andreihaha]

Yeah, good thing you were sleeping at that hour.
I have to agree with everyone that you're overthinking this.
She was interested in you enough to text you at 4 am.
Invite her to your place. "I'm gonna fry some meat" or "I feel like drinking some blabla tonight" should work. Close the deal, if that's what you want. Should be easy.

 

[biggoal]

Its weird. What girl texts you at 4 am.
I dont answer and i next her. Your neediness for the booty call is the problem bj and i would suspect this woman is less then stellar.

That hot teacher last summer texted me like 530am to see if I was up. Wtf.

 

[biggoal]

Bullshyt

Serious, it was like 530am. I woke up at 830 and was wondering who the hell was texting me so early since everyone knows I'm not a morning person.

 

[mrgoodstuff]

Serious, it was like 530am. I woke up at 830 and was wondering who the hell was texting me so early since everyone knows I'm not a morning person.

And if you start popping up at 530am then what?

 

[biggoal]

And if you start popping up at 530am then what?

I wouldn't lol because I'm never up that early.

 

[RickTheToad]

Serious, it was like 530am. I woke up at 830 and was wondering who the hell was texting me so early since everyone knows I'm not a morning person.

I call bullsh it

 

[Black Widow Void]

Unless you dropped her off less than an hour ago, texting at 4:00 AM is bit peculiar.

Were drinks involved that night? If so, she might even be embarrassed about the text and I'd overlook it. Most of us here have had a bit to drink and made a 'late nite' call/visit to someone.

If she was sober and texted at 4:00 AM, , I'd have some minor reservations.