Women that want "submissive" men

[BPH]

Somebody explain this to me. I'm gonna tag @BeExcellent and @Sega Genesis in on this one.

I've got a girl I matched with on a dating app who I then number-closed through Instagram that I'm supposed to meet with tomorrow up in Philly. We've been chatting back-and-forth for the past few days; she's been sending me dirty pics, and it's looking like all green lights.

However...we are texting right this moment; the conversation is getting a little explicit. She'd mentioned that she's into some kinky stuff, along with some "power dynamic" stuff, and asked if I liked "dominant women". I didn't think much of it...but now she's telling me to "behave" and that she wants me on my knees, sending me a reel on Instagram of some dude with a bunch of captions like "yes mommy".

I don't know how committed she is to this specific bit, and I can play the game a LITTLE bit if that's something she's into, but that's just really unnatural behavior for me, and I'm trying to grasp how that can be something she likes. Because most women want to be led, provided for, protected, dominated, etc. When she takes on that role and the man is in the submissive role, how can she respect that or be attracted to that?

Is that the point? Like a humiliation thing?

As far as background context, she works as a bottle/shot girl, is very attractive, and has a poor relationship with her father (her parents are divorced). I know that information probably explains some of this, but I don't understand how a dynamic could exist where the woman is attracted to her man when she occasionally treats him like a pu**y.

EDIT: I'm gonna tag @Hal9000 cus I know he knows his sh** and I see he's back.

 

[Plinco]

Some of the more deviant women get off on the power. She sees a sissy boy in you and wants to peg you.

I would have said something like "sweetie, I'm the penetrator and you're the penetratee"

 

[crowolf]

Seems like life is currently asking you this question: How far are you willing to go just to have some temporary pleasure?

 

[Bokanovsky]

There are a lot of weirdos out there. Believe it or not, there are some men who like to suck d!ck. I know, I didn't believe it at first either, but apparently it's true.

 

[Clockwerk50]

This is all I can think of, and the article below is an example of a woman wanting a simp because she's been hurt by a dominant man. Subjectively speaking, just because she wants that doesn't necessarily mean it's good in the long run.

Rachael Kirkconnell Says There's 'No Way' She'd Take Matt James Back - Us

As for your girl, you can mirror her interests to draw her in, but don't take it too far. If you try too hard to please her, she'll eventually see you as a pushover with no real identity of your own, and the attraction may wear off. You need to know who you are and eventually reverse the dynamic.

Personally, I think she may simply be trying to charm and seduce you, as odd as that sounds. If you stay true to yourself, you won't lose your sense of independence, and the tables may eventually turn, with her following your lead and entering your world.

 

[retardedautist2020]

Some of the more deviant women get off on the power. She sees a sissy boy in you and wants to peg you.

I would have said something like "sweetie, I'm the penetrator and you're the penetratee"

Wow Plinco you got it right for once.

 

[justaroundthecorner]

Next her, hot looking weirdo is still a weirdo.

Women that are 100% dominant are only ready to:
- humiliate you;
- provide you with physical pain;
- will treat you like garbage in front of third persons;
- will exploit you financially;
- will rarely if ever spread her legs and your erotic pleasure may offend her unless it will be scraps of what normie gets

They also evade normal guys (because they know they would be negatively perceived as per their extraordinary behaviour). She seems to get on power because she has none (shot girl is like what? 50% of bartender?), probably getting hit by semi-drunk guys all the time.

Sounds like big waste of time honestly.

 

[BPH]

I think some of you are blowing this out of proportion just a tiny bit...

Maybe I'm making it sound like the entire conversation turned into this, rather than a tiny portion where she explained to me one of her kinks. Wasn't expecting such a knee-jerk reaction.

@Clockwerk50 I appreciate your response. It's definitely the most level-headed one so far

 

[BackInTheGame78]

I'd laugh at her and be like find some other b!tch ass dude.

Or just play along and then destroy her in the bedroom to the point she would never bring that up again.

She would be left in a state of near incapacitation from exhaustion after what would occur and be in no position to try and "dominate" anyone

 

[BadBoy89]

However...we are texting right this moment; the conversation is getting a little explicit. She'd mentioned that she's into some kinky stuff, along with some "power dynamic" stuff, and asked if I liked "dominant women". I didn't think much of it...but now she's telling me to "behave" and that she wants me on my knees, sending me a reel on Instagram of some dude with a bunch of captions like "yes mommy".

I don't know how committed she is to this specific bit, and I can play the game a LITTLE bit if that's something she's into, but that's just really unnatural behavior for me, and I'm trying to grasp how that can be something she likes. Because most women want to be led, provided for, protected, dominated, etc. When she takes on that role and the man is in the submissive role, how can she respect that or be attracted to that?

As long as it's a role in bedroom and not a relationship dynamic, you should be fine. How far you are willing to go is up to you.

Is that the point? Like a humiliation thing?

Depends the extent of it. I would be more sensitive if a girl talked back to me or made an assumption.

As far as background context, she works as a bottle/shot girl, is very attractive, and has a poor relationship with her father (her parents are divorced). I know that information probably explains some of this, but I don't understand how a dynamic could exist where the woman is attracted to her man when she occasionally treats him like a pu**y.

Her anger at her dad makes her want to get back at male gender. It's not so much about attraction.

I wouldn't over analyze it. Just say "no, not happening"

 

[Plinco]

This is all I can think of, and the article below is an example of a woman wanting a simp because she's been hurt by a dominant man. Subjectively speaking, just because she wants that doesn't necessarily mean it's good in the long run.

Rachael Kirkconnell Says There's 'No Way' She'd Take Matt James Back - Us

As for your girl, you can mirror her interests to draw her in, but don't take it too far. If you try too hard to please her, she'll eventually see you as a pushover with no real identity of your own, and the attraction may wear off. You need to know who you are and eventually reverse the dynamic.

Personally, I think she may simply be trying to charm and seduce you, as odd as that sounds. If you stay true to yourself, you won't lose your sense of independence, and the tables may eventually turn, with her following your lead and entering your world.

Possibly. Another possibility is she could be conditioned from pornography, and maybe you can re-condition her.

I've heard some really deviant sht from women before.

 

[The Duke]

Whenever I ran across a girl like this, I never stuck around long enough to figure out why they were interested in this type of dynamic. I wasn't willing to be her target so I could get a little sex.

I'd guess it could be due to many things: She has daddy issues, mad at men, likes power, acting out a fantasy that is far different than her daily life, etc.

 

[Clockwerk50]

Possibly. Another possibility is she could be conditioned from pornography, and maybe you can re-condition her.

I've heard some really deviant sht from women before.

That’s the beauty of it. No one, not even OP, knows what’s behind this girl’s eyes, how she thinks and behaves, or why she is the way she is. We can only speculate about what the future holds or what the past brought. The only way to confirm our assumptions is for OP to get to know her.

 

[Bigpapa]

Whenever I ran across a girl like this, I never stuck around long enough to figure out why they were interested in this type of dynamic. I wasn't willing to be her target so I could get a little sex.

I'd guess it could be due to many things: She has daddy issues, mad at men, likes power, acting out a fantasy that is far different than her daily life, etc.

met a girl once on an online dating app, she liked both to have power and to be submissive

We suppose to meet, but then I realized that I was thinking with my d1ck instead of thinking with my brain so I ghosted her

she was f8cked in the head. One of the most f8cked up people I ever met. Since then when I hear about stuff like these I just ghost

Also went once to benghraim, a very famous bar where sex happens in Europe, really f8cked up people and did not feel good. Also the quality was really low

She had also a great body but an ugly face

 

[Plinco]

That’s the beauty of it. No one, not even OP, knows what’s behind this girl’s eyes, how she thinks and behaves, or why she is the way she is. We can only speculate about what the future holds or what the past brought. The only way to confirm our assumptions is for OP to get to know her.

We yet know the reason why, but op should be careful that he's not getting caught between a c0ck and a hard place

 

[BPH]

I should just stick to messaging the people whose opinions I value directly at this point...

 

[Clockwerk50]

I should just stick to messaging the people whose opinions I value directly at this point...

I understand why you're curious about why she is like that, but there could be multiple reasons behind this behaviour, and it's hard to draw conclusions with limited information since you barely know her. Go meet her and enjoy yourself. Best-case scenario, as your gut tells you, it's just a small, insignificant quirk of her personality. Worst-case scenario, you learn something new.

Don't let other men's fears and assumptions influence your judgment.

 

[BPH]

I understand why you're curious about why she is like that, but there could be multiple reasons behind this behaviour, and it's hard to draw conclusions with limited information since you barely know her. Go meet her and enjoy yourself. Best-case scenario, as your gut tells you, it's just a small, insignificant quirk of her personality. Worst-case scenario, you learn something new.

Don't let other men's fears and assumptions influence your judgment.

Yep, that's what the plan is. Date got pushed to tomorrow.

I didn't actually ask any of these guys what I should do; I'm just curious about this type of behavior. Somehow that evolved into everybody thinking I'm gonna be taking a d*ck.

 

[Sega Genesis]

Yep, that's what the plan is. Date got pushed to tomorrow.

I didn't actually ask any of these guys what I should do; I'm just curious about this type of behavior. Somehow that evolved into everybody thinking I'm gonna be taking a d*ck.

@BPH I agree with @Clockwerk50 it could be so many things ranging from a shyt test to wanting to demonstrate how sexually open and adventurous she is to thinking it's a turn on for you or something else entirely.

Not all women want to be dominated and there are men for whom being dominated turns them on!

In LTRs for example it not unusual to want to switch things up occasionally too, role playing with the woman taking the lead and the man being passive. Even when the woman typically likes to be dominated.

The "yes mommy" thing IS a bit much though!

As @Clockwerk50 said go on the date and see what happens; you're very experienced you should be able to turn it around and lead/dominate and my guess is she wouid respond positively and love it!

Looking forward to your lay report!

 

[Cheeky_James]

I should just stick to messaging the people whose opinions I value directly at this point...

lol.
Has the penny dropped only now for you around this? Only took me a few months to figure that one out … lolz