Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Dating apps are dying

Snag87

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People think they’ll be around forever, and maybe that’s true, but not on anywhere near the scale we’ve seen in previous years. I’ve tried Hinge, Bumble and Tinder over the last few months. I eventually deleted Bumble and Tinder as my experience was just ghastly. I believe I had one match who wasn’t morbidly obese or biologically male. Hinge was a different story. I managed to rack up 150 or so matches, which led to three dates. That said, the difference in quality on Hinge between now and 2021 was palpable. It’s just night and day. In 2021 I could consistently match with attractive women, although I admittedly did struggle to convince them to go on dates with me. In present day virtually all of my matches are average or below average. And it’s not just my matches; there are significantly fewer attractive women on the apps period, which obviously means more competition for them.

I would have a hard time recommending dating apps for any man these days, particularly if the man doesn’t have extremely high SMV. I believe meeting woman organically or through AI match makers is the future.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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BPH

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People think they’ll be around forever, and maybe that’s true, but not on anywhere near the scale we’ve seen in previous years.
Strongly disagree.

I spent the past year trying my hand as a dating coach...believing that people would appreciate somebody genuine who gets around with a bunch of women, without all the skits, paid actresses, and fakery of social media.

Know who they bought into instead?

The guys selling dating app makeovers and courses on Tinder, Bumble, and Hinge.

Know why?

Because it's easier to take tasteful pictures, have AI photoshop you, and appear larger-than-life online. After all, that is EXACTLY why social media is so popular; it's a highlight reel. Get rejected on an app? You'll never know. Get a like or a match on an app? You get a push notification and a dopamine hit inviting you to start conversing with a lovely woman who, unbeknownst to you, probably has about 100 other guys messaging her at the same time, and will likely not keep the conversation long enough to meet up for a date.

People go broke on social media pretending to be rich...so I have a hard time believing anybody will be upset about not going on enough dates if they're still getting plenty of matches.
 

jhonny9546

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Your experience is totally subjective.

We know women will get of course "easier" life, but the app works if you're an attractive man.
(It works for me, even if I am below 165cm)

So I can say it works if you're attractive.
You get what you ask.

Dating apps are there to satisfy the need for sex/intimacy, mostly quick sex.
But there are also deep and meaningful people (rare)
 

Snag87

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Your experience is totally subjective.

We know women will get of course "easier" life, but the app works if you're an attractive man.
(It works for me, even if I am below 165cm)

So I can say it works if you're attractive.
You get what you ask.

Dating apps are there to satisfy the need for sex/intimacy, mostly quick sex.
But there are also deep and meaningful people (rare)
Of course it’s subjective. That said, why would my results be so much worse than they were 5 years ago?
 

The Duke

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Yes by the numbers, the apps are dying. One can spend about 5minutes on yahoo finance or google AI and figure that out if you can't see if from being an actual usuer over the years.

Bumble is probably going to get sold again. That company has experienced so much turmoil over the years.

Tinder, Bumble, and Match have all experienced declining user bases that last several years. Hinge is the only one that hasn't shrunk. I would suspect its because Hinge hasn't been around for as long as the others. I also hear a lot of people say its more effective which was my experience as well.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Gamisch

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Of course it’s subjective. That said, why would my results be so much worse than they were 5 years ago?
Because.
1 there are less women. A decent looking woman ( hb5 and up) can and will still be "d1ck- bombed " IRL wherever she goes. The ratio now is like 70/ 30.

2 . The women that do stay use it like a man uses Pronhub; there will always be a new (toptier) dude she hasn't entertained yet.

3. To allude to the previous point; the only men who DON'T get burned out will be men who are attractive and thus have succeeded on the apps. That means that despite the messed up ratio its STILL filters toptier men from average below men; for every average man that gives up another attractive man takes his place and actually stays!.

4. The secret algorithm. By now you're probably downvoted so much that match.com( controls ALL the apps) has you in the "below average " bracket regardless of you being or not being somewhat attractive IRL . Dislike= not attractive to the algorithm. You'll probably get 97 out of 100 dislikes from women and/ or perhaps even 197 out of 200 ect, basically fecking up your online presence permanently.

The women have no incentive to like or match with you. And even IF you'd get a like it'll be an uphill battle to actually coin in your dates. 5 years ago it literally was a different game.
 

nicksaiz65

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I’ve heard the term “dating app fatigue” going around a lot. People can argue about whether nightlife is declining or what not, blah blah blah, but approaching women in person will never die.
 

Solomon

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People think they’ll be around forever, and maybe that’s true, but not on anywhere near the scale we’ve seen in previous years. I’ve tried Hinge, Bumble and Tinder over the last few months. I eventually deleted Bumble and Tinder as my experience was just ghastly. I believe I had one match who wasn’t morbidly obese or biologically male. Hinge was a different story. I managed to rack up 150 or so matches, which led to three dates. That said, the difference in quality on Hinge between now and 2021 was palpable. It’s just night and day. In 2021 I could consistently match with attractive women, although I admittedly did struggle to convince them to go on dates with me. In present day virtually all of my matches are average or below average. And it’s not just my matches; there are significantly fewer attractive women on the apps period, which obviously means more competition for them.

I would have a hard time recommending dating apps for any man these days, particularly if the man doesn’t have extremely high SMV. I believe meeting woman organically or through AI match makers is the future.

150 matches and only 3 dates? that's a bad clip of 0.02% seems like a skill issue (i.e. game or vetting or both)

I don't think dating apps will die per se but will be replaced by some new apps that have better AI intergration I do think in 2040 dating apps will give way to VR (virtual reality) dating apps, the tech isn't there yet but will be very soon
 

Bigpapa

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150 matches and only 3 dates? that's a bad clip of 0.02% seems like a skill issue (i.e. game or vetting or both)

I don't think dating apps will die per se but will be replaced by some new apps that have better AI intergration I do think in 2040 dating apps will give way to VR (virtual reality) dating apps, the tech isn't there yet but will be very soon
Yeah, you are right it can be a skill issue but it also can be the fact that the spike of attention wh0ring spiked through the stratosphere in the last couple of years

I experienced this more and more in the last 2 years, and so do guys who are actually quite high in the pua social hierarchy .

You see more and more girls that you would not even think about approaching in the first place rejecting you, despite you not even trying to approach them

Ego got so high that girls just feel a high by rejecting a guy despite knowingly that she has no chance with him

feels more “ empowering “ to reject a guy ( even if you have no chance with him ) than to feel bad that he did not pick you
 
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