"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Being a couple but living apart in separate homes

jhonny9546

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 17, 2024
Messages
2,613
Reaction score
549
Location
Italy
What are the real reasons a couple feels the need to live apart?
(Staying married but living in separate places/houses and seeing each other only for commitments or to spend time together.)

There's a lot of nonsense online, but many people says it saved their relationship.
What are the real reasons a couple would do this? You need to have ironclad trust in your partner. Will it work?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Jor-El

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Jul 7, 2020
Messages
418
Reaction score
505
Location
UK
I think you get all the best bits and none of the bad....wouldnt work for everyone,but,nice to have your own space as well. best of both worlds
 

Manure Spherian

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 16, 2023
Messages
1,900
Reaction score
1,645
Age
48
What are the real reasons a couple feels the need to live apart?
(Staying married but living in separate places/houses and seeing each other only for commitments or to spend time together.)

There's a lot of nonsense online, but many people says it saved their relationship.
What are the real reasons a couple would do this? You need to have ironclad trust in your partner. Will it work?
Have a father out of a home. Great idea and model of marriage for the kids!
 

The Duke

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 4, 2008
Messages
6,541
Reaction score
11,501
Maybe they feel it's more like dating and easier to keep the spark alive. Perhaps they don't get so complacent and things stay more exciting. I could see how it would work for the right folks.

I would probably be a good candidate. I appreciate my alone time so I can get done what I need to do on my terms. It recharges me and allows me to feel like I have freedom and I need more than the average person.. Time spent together feels so much more important.

It's obvious living together doesn't work for a lot of people either.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

MatureDJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 30, 2006
Messages
12,733
Reaction score
5,152
I know a couple like this. The husband has a teenage child and he gets her week-on, week-off. The wife keeps her place and lives with him when the child isn't. Presumably when the child is finished high school, they will get a new house together (he is much more wealthy than her).
 

BaronOfHair

Master Don Juan
Joined
Feb 14, 2024
Messages
5,535
Reaction score
3,011
Age
37
It's obvious living together doesn't work for a lot of people either.
Yeah, even Esther Perel counsels that couples NOT go overboard on how much time they hang around one another, and to keep things light and fun whenever they are in the vicinity of each other

Men and women prior to The Industrial Evolution DIDN'T spend much time around one another... That almost certainly trimmed down the sort of melodrama that's now rampant in so many homes throughout The Post-Industrial West. Keeping Up With The Kardashians wouldn't have remained a mainstay of popular culture for over 2 f-cking decades, if so many every day folks didn't see their own lives reflected in that crud, albeit in a more glitzy fashion
 
Last edited:

jhonny9546

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jan 17, 2024
Messages
2,613
Reaction score
549
Location
Italy
The reason is because you actually aren't a good fit for each other but want to gaslight yourself into believing you are.
Okay! So this assumes it's normal for two people to sleep in the same bed every day?

Just a genuine question.
Maybe they feel it's more like dating and easier to keep the spark alive. Perhaps they don't get so complacent and things stay more exciting. I could see how it would work for the right folks.

I would probably be a good candidate. I appreciate my alone time so I can get done what I need to do on my terms. It recharges me and allows me to feel like I have freedom and I need more than the average person.. Time spent together feels so much more important.

It's obvious living together doesn't work for a lot of people either.
Currently, I have to see and think like you.
It's always honeymoon phase
 
Top