How do you handle trying to hit on the daughter of a woman in your social circle?

[Slowhandluke]

Why would a 40+ never married and childless man want to get married and have kids?

Because people are different. Personally I love kids (I have one son and hes awesome).

By definition, a wealthy, WEALTHY older man will have the resources for children. If not, then in my opinion hes not wealthy and the chances of him attracting an young attractive woman is low.

Trust me there's some really wealthy men out there even after their divorce. This situation would never have happen if women didn't divorce their husbands so often. But society is dealing with this situation - perfectly good men getting shiet canned by their wives because culture is telling these women: "they deserve better".

oh, well... deal with the environment as it is, not how we think it ought to be...

 

[BaronOfHair]

Why would a 40+ never married and childless man want to get married and have kids?

Increasingly, it takes longer for men to become financially sturdy than it did in decades past, when a high school dropout could achieve a solidly middle class existence via relatively low skilled labor in the manufacturing sector. Thus, men becoming fathers later on in life is going to be an ever-more frequent occurrence

 

[Slowhandluke]

Increasingly, it takes longer for men to become financially sturdy than it did in decades past, when a high school dropout could achieve a solidly middle class existence via relatively low skilled labor in the manufacturing sector. Thus, men becoming fathers later on in life is going to be an ever-more frequent occurrence

yeah, feminism is really hurting poor men the most. As women pair up with above average men, these men if they get divorced, return to the dating pool displacing more men on the lower end of the spectrum.

obviously feminism also is hurting all the female boomers/gen X'ers who thought divorcing their perfectly good husband was a great idea because he forgot to throw out the garage (or something stupid like that).

More age gap marriages (it obviously wouldn't be the majority, but I'm assuming at least 2x as many). Young men wouldnt be able to compete with older single men, so these young men will also need to get older to date - causing even more big age gap marriages. its like a snowball effect.

 

[BaronOfHair]

Young men wouldnt be able to compete with older single men...

And perhaps it's unwise for them to even try to do so, especially when voluminous evidence indicates that most women PREFER older guys https://www.realmenrealstyle.com/older-men-younger-women/

Far more astute to direct one's energies towards becoming that future self

 

[SW15]

Increasingly, it takes longer for men to become financially sturdy than it did in decades past, when a high school dropout could achieve a solidly middle class existence via relatively low skilled labor in the manufacturing sector. Thus, men becoming fathers later on in life is going to be an ever-more frequent occurrence

This is a valid point of view. The trend in recent decades in Western nations has been to delay fertility. The aging Millennial generation (1981-1996 births) has delayed their fertility more than any other generation before it. This is partly a function of fathers but I think this is more of a function of mothers wanting to spend their 20s being promiscuous before settling down for a Last Call type baby. Also, Millennials have gone to college more than predecessor generations.

a wealthy, WEALTHY older man will have the resources for children.

A wealthy older man will have the resources for children regardless of whether he takes a layoff during the 50-65 age range.

It's more difficult to find men in their 40s/early 50s who have the financial resources to withstand a layoff in their 50s while still having children at home who are financial dependents. It's not good to be a 55 year old man with a 12 and 8 year old still at home and dealing with trying to get a new white collar job.

in my opinion hes not wealthy and the chances of him attracting an young attractive woman is low.

Men are usually going to need a solid income/net worth to attract and to retain a woman 10+ years younger. Money is a key element for the age gap relationship.

 

[pipeman84]

Why would a 40+ never married and childless man want to get married and have kids?

He's already lived 20+ years of adult life as a never married and childless man.

You practically answered your own question. He's been there, done that, accumulated experiences, wealth, wisdom. What else could he do? Keep reliving the last 20+ years over and over, in a loop, like in Groundhog Day?
The closest alternative that I can think of to becoming a father is being some kind of coach to kids/youth.

 

[SW15]

You practically answered your own question. He's been there, done that, accumulated experiences, wealth, wisdom. What else could he do? Keep reliving the last 20+ years over and over, in a loop, like in Groundhog Day?

Yes, a 40 something man could continue down the same path. He doesn't need to have children late in life as it is likely to impact his retirement timeline.

Many 40 something men have not accumulated wealth. Many are living paycheck to paycheck and have limited savings. Many have never had good earnings during their 20+ years of adulthood.

 

[BillyPilgrim]

That actually varies heavily, from region to region, BE... Throughout Applachia + large areas of Texas and The Pacific Northwest, not only are pops's regularly imagining such acts, they're likely to challenge any man who beds DD before they get a crack at doing tne honors themselves to a duel, via .45

I suppose such fellas deserve a measure of respect for handling their gripes Mano E Mano, rather than resorting to drive bys and the like

You forgot the Ozarks, another Scots-Irish hotbed. And lets give rural Maine their flowers too. When you consider where the Hillbillies came from (Northern Ireland), it gives the Irish Troubles a whole new flavor.

 

[BaronOfHair]

And lets give rural Maine their flowers too

Pennywise's origins may be less supernatural than previously believed

 

[Vanderdonck]

I could see WHY a man over 40 might want kids. There is always the possibility of an existential vacuum or just that natural desire once life is set. However for me, the curiosity never turned into a real pull. I have had opportunities since 40 but just don't want them even though I feel curiosity/occasional interest in having a child. My woman is much younger than I so it's possible but why, so I can have my time interrupted and money spent? Not my scene.

What else could he do? Keep reliving the last 20+ years over and over, in a loop, like in Groundhog Day?
The closest alternative that I can think of to becoming a father is being some kind of coach to kids/youth.

I get what you're saying, but this sounds similar to when people shame bachelors for not "settling down." There is much more to life IMO even after 40. Millions of reasons not to have kids. The only real reason to have them is because a man really wants to (and hopefully can afford it).

Anyway this is probably all moot, we don't know if that's the OP's aim.

 

[Divorced w 3]

Yes, a 40 something man could continue down the same path. He doesn't need to have children late in life as it is likely to impact his retirement timeline.

Many 40 something men have not accumulated wealth. Many are living paycheck to paycheck and have limited savings. Many have never had good earnings during their 20+ years of adulthood.

maybe his dream in retirement is to be surrounded by a youthful family and he has accumulated the resources to do so.

I love being a dad. It’s causing no stress on my ability to have a vibrant sex life and if I could have ten more kids I would - but the one drag about young kids is that you have to give up a couple years of flexibility for each one of them. So as mine mature into their late single / early teens we are doing more of the travel / big ticket stuff that got put to wayside for a couple while that nasty process played out and now, we just get to have a good time moving ahead

im punching this out from a Dunkin’ Donuts parking lot with a small bag of munchkins for those sleeping hellcats as we speak

all I do these days, is play with my kids, make money, get laid, have a good time, and I just shot a provocative text to my ex bc I felt like breaking her balls about the adulterous vermin she apparently brought to the pool with his kids and my kids last weekend, but in a nutshell life is short, don’t live anyone else’s playbook

 

[Beyond It]

Don't prey on daughters in your friend group. And that is how you could easily be percieved, as a predator by your female peers. Not good.

Interesting. Admitting that women can’t control their biology driven impulses and desires. Reversing it and calling the man a predator. Women do whatever they want and do not follow rules laid out for them. By anyone.

Men are tricked into thinking they actually pick up women. It’s simply not true. Women control this. Or rather their emotional drives dictate the end result. It’s a game. Men should never break the laws of the land. As well, never let a woman make rules for you.
“Rules for me but not thee”

every woman who speaks out against this is showing you that they violated that very same rule when they were much younger. Let them age out and die out.

 

[MatureDJ]

Men are tricked into thinking they actually pick up women. It’s simply not true. Women control this. Or rather their emotional drives dictate the end result. It’s a game.

Briffault's law

Briffault's law holds that women only associate with men when they can personally benefit from doing so. In other words, that females exhibit non-altruism and are...

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