"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Woman at Swimming Pool

Tyrion

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There’s a woman at my local swimming pool that I’ve started some light conversations when in the pool in the last weeks.
I guess she’s early forties and she said she has a son. There’s no wedding ring, but that could be not wearing it for swimming.
Last week and this week she’s initiating light conversations when taking a short breather in the pool.
I’m swimming because it’s something I enjoy. I’m not there to try and pickup women, but open to opportunities if they present themselves.

I’m interested, but uncertain how to proceed.
Next Saturday is my last swimming session I’ll see her before I go away on holiday. It’ll be 3 weeks before I’ll see her in the pool again.

Do I mention to her that I’m going away or just disappear for a few weeks?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Clockwerk50

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There’s a woman at my local swimming pool that I’ve started some light conversations when in the pool in the last weeks.
I guess she’s early forties and she said she has a son. There’s no wedding ring, but that could be not wearing it for swimming.
Last week and this week she’s initiating light conversations when taking a short breather in the pool.
I’m swimming because it’s something I enjoy. I’m not there to try and pickup women, but open to opportunities if they present themselves.

I’m interested, but uncertain how to proceed.
Next Saturday is my last swimming session I’ll see her before I go away on holiday. It’ll be 3 weeks before I’ll see her in the pool again.

Do I mention to her that I’m going away or just disappear for a few weeks?
“Hey by any chance want do you want to meet up for a coffee outside of this building?

Take life by the horns.
 

FlexpertHamilton

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There’s a woman at my local swimming pool that I’ve started some light conversations when in the pool in the last weeks.
I guess she’s early forties and she said she has a son. There’s no wedding ring, but that could be not wearing it for swimming.
Last week and this week she’s initiating light conversations when taking a short breather in the pool.
I’m swimming because it’s something I enjoy. I’m not there to try and pickup women, but open to opportunities if they present themselves.

I’m interested, but uncertain how to proceed.
Next Saturday is my last swimming session I’ll see her before I go away on holiday. It’ll be 3 weeks before I’ll see her in the pool again.

Do I mention to her that I’m going away or just disappear for a few weeks?
just ask if she wants to grab a drink or something
 

FlexpertHamilton

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there's not much to analyze, ask her to grab a c0cktail or wine or smthn. but it would be effective to have a good date, then get her thinking about you for 3 weeks then smash when you get back.

“Hey by any chance want do you want to meet up for a coffee outside of this building?

Take life by the horns.
coffee? no. has any man ever banged a women after a coffee date?
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Clockwerk50

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there's not much to analyze, ask her to grab a c0cktail or wine or smthn. but it would be effective to have a good date, then get her thinking about you for 3 weeks then smash when you get back.


coffee? no. has any man ever banged a women after a coffee date?
yea you are right.
 

BillyPilgrim

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OP one option is to mention your travel holiday as a DHV and build up intrigue about your trip. Then she can ask you about it when you get back and see her in the pool, and ask her out then once you've built up more interest and rapport. It might be optimal logistically to broach meeting up when you get back from vacation.

You could ask her out now and then mention the trip when discussing scheduling, but the logistics aren't good for building up buying temp and striking while the iron's hot.
 

Tyrion

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Saw her today after the Christmas break. Asked her how her Christmas was and she mentioned something about her husband.
After that she did her usual thing of waiting for me to catch up before starting the next length with a beaming smile so that we end up doing the same number of lengths.
Waited for me at the end of the session so she could say bye.

Maybe she’s just flirting, however for me as she’s married flirting is as far as it will go.
 

Bokanovsky

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Saw her today after the Christmas break. Asked her how her Christmas was and she mentioned something about her husband.
After that she did her usual thing of waiting for me to catch up before starting the next length with a beaming smile so that we end up doing the same number of lengths.
Waited for me at the end of the session so she could say bye.

Maybe she’s just flirting, however for me as she’s married flirting is as far as it will go.
Attention wh0re
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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