"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
40, very much a cat mom, doesn't want kids, didn't date on her 30s
- Thread starter Borknagar
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Gamisch
Master Don Juan
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- 5,338
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You might as well go for this. This seems like a more realistic option.
Just don't expect it to last forever. If anything, don't underestimate the amount of options that such a woman has.
Barrister
Master Don Juan
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- 40
Not dating "at all" in her 30s would be a red flag. Not that I buy that for a second. But really, any woman who is hot and single past 30 has some at least some latent red flags. Just based on what you're describing, there is no reason to not at least sleep with her and turn her into a plate. Anything more and you need to gather more intel as you spend time together before making that call.
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Doctor Europeo
Moderator
Solomon
Master Don Juan
40 no kids and hot? that's rare
Somehow 40 and hot are mutually exclusive
Modern Man Advice
Master Don Juan
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She is effectively a cat lady, and I don't mean that in a good way.
To your question, enjoy it while it lasts.
Macadellic
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 1, 2021
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- 380
- Reaction score
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"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Pierce Manhammer
Moderator
BackInTheGame78
Moderator
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That usually means she is a psycho. That's the biggest red flag there is for a woman. That isn't a plus, that's a huge minus.
Pierce Manhammer
Moderator
Correction: a little crazy makes for great sechs.
EyeBRollin
Master Don Juan
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- Oct 18, 2015
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- 10,539
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This is the way.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Do you have a face that go with that?
Pierce Manhammer
Moderator
I do but you’ll never see it…why da fuk would I post up a fwbs picture here? /facepalm
How do I know she has a good looking face?
Pierce Manhammer
Moderator
I frankly don’t give a f*ck what you think, chances are all of my plates are hotter than anything you could ever get even in the same postal code with. You’ll have to take my word for it, especially since you’re on a board looking for men to pic put a of their fwbs.How do I know she has a good looking face?
The thirst is real.
Bokanovsky
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 7, 2012
- Messages
- 5,516
- Reaction score
- 5,695
Don't be surprised if you invite a certain measure of ridicule when trying to brag on the internet. Why did you post that photo to begin with?
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.