"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Should we de-fund/abolish the police?

Should we de-fund the police?


  • Total voters
    39

Epicenter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
1,003
Reaction score
376
Age
56
This is a complicated topic even for those who actually live here, so it’s impossible for those who don’t to understand.

Yes most topics are complicated. That doesn't mean an outside perspective is uninformed. It may look that way to you. Most people don't do self improvement that is why they have sometimes a different world view. So their views are biased. All the information will be bend to fit into their agenda. So it does not mean that much that one is from the country.

Though I see your viewpoint but I am not new to the topic. The conversation should have the benefit for us all to dive deeper into the topic and become better informed.
There is a reason USA imports intellectuals on the highest level because their drive and intelligence are needed to better life. So outsiders are not automatically worse.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Epicenter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
1,003
Reaction score
376
Age
56
This whole issue about race relationships can also be viewed or tied to what's going on in Sosuave.

The vast majority of men here don't want to evolve BUT still comes on here complaining abt how women are BAD to them.

And the worse part is, it's the men themselves that gives PERMISSION for women that's in a relationship with them to BULLY them endlessly.

YES BULLY!

YET they take no responsibility whatsoever AND that's the core problem - because when you don't admit it you WILL never change.
I agree. On a lower level first thing people do is blaming others. Some evolve from that stage and put in the work some don't.

(On a philosophical level I am a determinist that means there is no free will people have no choice. So they don't have "real responsibility". It's nature doing it's thing)
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,782
Reaction score
9,997
On a philosophical level I am a determinist that means there is no free will people have no choice. So they don't have "real responsibility". It's nature doing it's thing
That's interesting, I don't think I've ever heard anyone else say they are a determinist on this forum. It seems to blow against the DJ idea that you can "will" yourself into being a top 3% male (or whatever percentage it is this week. I've been seeing 1% mentioned more lately). I wouldn't go so far as to say there is no free will, but I do think it is true to a certain extent - most people are prisoners of their behaviors. I know there are studies that show people's personalities are formed at a certain age, for example. I suppose some people can change, but if it's against their nature it's extremely, extremely difficult.
 

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,329
Reaction score
6,875
I agree. On a lower level first thing people do is blaming others. Some evolve from that stage and put in the work some don't.

(On a philosophical level I am a determinist that means there is no free will people have no choice. So they don't have "real responsibility". It's nature doing it's thing)
Philosophy can be equated with how you think.

How you think + how you do things = the results you see in ur daily life.

So if you change ur philosophy, would the results also change?
 

Epicenter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
1,003
Reaction score
376
Age
56
Philosophy can be equated with how you think.

How you think + how you do things = the results you see in ur daily life.

So if you change ur philosophy, would the results also change?

Philosophy as action:
The word philosophy is used in different contexts. On a narrower level like when you say: "This is the philosophy of our company". In this context it can be used as "way to think". So if you change your philosophy of your company your results change. In this context I would agree.


Philosophy as a question:
On a higher level "philosophy" means to deal with the mystery of life. Do we really exist the way we think we exist? Is life deterministic? Even if life is deterministic is it better to act like it's not most of the time? If free will exists, how is it even possible? Are the laws of science real or just historical patterns? What is the value of life? and so on.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Epicenter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
1,003
Reaction score
376
Age
56
That's interesting, I don't think I've ever heard anyone else say they are a determinist on this forum. It seems to blow against the DJ idea that you can "will" yourself into being a top 3% male (or whatever percentage it is this week. I've been seeing 1% mentioned more lately). I wouldn't go so far as to say there is no free will, but I do think it is true to a certain extent - most people are prisoners of their behaviors. I know there are studies that show people's personalities are formed at a certain age, for example. I suppose some people can change, but if it's against their nature it's extremely, extremely difficult.
I guess in real life I act like I have a free will.

Back in my mind I think physics have to follow laws. So I can not have any real freedom.

I think that the hot girl I see is basically a electrical inpulse that goes into my brain. On the other hand I am horny.

So practically I do more believe in free will. "Theoretically and philosophically" I don't do much believe in it.

Intellectuals often discuss if the "philosophical" believe in determinism has actually an effect on real life. Some argue that one beliefs in determinism because they want to give up on life and are lazy.

I think that the "push it mentality" correlates often with the believe in free will. That might be the reason that this practical philosophy is the predominant one here.

But when you look closer to it often there is a higher philosophical level to it. Many people with this mentality often can reveal that the reason they "push hard to get girls" is because they have no choice because they are so "addicted, in love" with girls.

Same with people who are successful. They often talk about "pushing it" but when asked they don't know what really makes them "push".

On a deeper level who can even answer the question: what is the "I"? What is identity?

In Germany we had a popular book from an philosopher. The titel was:

"Who am I? If yes, how many?

Btw I am a fan of Captain Kirk too and I agree with your signature.
 

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,329
Reaction score
6,875
Philosophy as a question:
On a higher level "philosophy" means to deal with the mystery of life. Do we really exist the way we think we exist? Is life deterministic? Even if life is deterministic is it better to act like it's not most of the time? If free will exists, how is it even possible? Are the laws of science real or just historical patterns? What is the value of life? and so on.
Philosophy is just how we think.

There's no higher, lower or middle.

Sometimes it deals with facts, sometimes it deals in delusions and yet othertimes it deals in a set of belief systems.

What's of importance is the result.

If the result you get svcks then how you think needs rearrangement.
 

Epicenter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
1,003
Reaction score
376
Age
56
Philosophy is just how we think.

There's no higher, lower or middle.

Sometimes it deals with facts, sometimes it deals in delusions and yet othertimes it deals in a set of belief systems.

What's of importance is the result.

If the result you get svcks then how you think needs rearrangement.
In general I agree but things tend to get complicated.

Even if you know the results suck what you don't know exactly is why it sucks. What methods you should use as an alternative. If you should just randomly do something else or get more data about it. Where to get the data? Which are the relevant one? How long shold you invest in a special data point? Basically how do I deal with the unknown. Just changing your way of thinking might not be enough.

Additonally you don't know if the results just suck now. Maybe in the future it would reveal itself as a good result. So you have no idea if it really sucks (with the future counted in)

Also when one changes his way of thinking it might have bad side effects like taking an alcoholic his alcohol away and he commits suicide.

Bottom line is if you want to solve a complicated problem you have to thinnk complicated. So things are not easy on a higher level.

It's like Rocket science. There is a reason why it takes so much time get to the moon again. It's because it's complicated. You have to put a lot of energy into it. You have to change the way to think all the time basically.

Solving the problem might suck more then getting the result.
 

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,329
Reaction score
6,875
In general I agree but things tend to get complicated.

Even if you know the results suck what you don't know exactly is why it sucks. What methods you should use as an alternative. If you should just randomly do something else or get more data about it. Where to get the data? Which are the relevant one? How long shold you invest in a special data point? Basically how do I deal with the unknown. Just changing your way of thinking might not be enough.

Additonally you don't know if the results just suck now. Maybe in the future it would reveal itself as a good result. So you have no idea if it really sucks (with the future counted in)

Also when one changes his way of thinking it might have bad side effects like taking an alcoholic his alcohol away and he commits suicide.

Bottom line is if you want to solve a complicated problem you have to thinnk complicated. So things are not easy on a higher level.

It's like Rocket science. There is a reason why it takes so much time get to the moon again. It's because it's complicated. You have to put a lot of energy into it. You have to change the way to think all the time basically.

Solving the problem might suck more then getting the result.
How you think = knowledge

Lack of knowledge affects how you do things and this in turn is reflective of the results you see.

But results is a combination of how you think plus how you do things.

However how you think is also influenced by your inherent personality plus how you were raised.
 

Epicenter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
1,003
Reaction score
376
Age
56
How you think = knowledge


However how you think is also influenced by your inherent personality plus how you were raised.
I agree. I would add it is also influenced by the capacity you have to compute the information. For example you will probably not be able to beat a chess computer.

Your brain probably is not good enough to compete with a computer. This result you probably will not have but your results will be better relatively speaking the better methods of thinking you use.
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,329
Reaction score
6,875
I agree. I would add it is also influenced by the capacity you have to compute the information. For example you will probably not be able to beat a chess computer.

Your brain probably is not good enough to compete with a computer. This result you probably will not have but your results will be better relatively speaking the better methods of thinking you use.
Yes in a manner of speaking.
 

zekko

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 6, 2009
Messages
16,782
Reaction score
9,997
I think that the hot girl I see is basically a electrical inpulse that goes into my brain. On the other hand I am horny.
Hard to argue with.

I've been watching some science vlogs lately. I like the ones about the nature of reality. Some theorize that we are living in a simulation (probably BS). There's another theory that we're living in a hologram. Not in the sense that it is being projected, but in the sense that our universe is really two dimensional but it holds the illusion of being three dimensional, like one of those 3D puzzle pictures that used to be popular. This has something to do with matter being imprinted on the flat surface of a black hole's event horizon.

Not sure what that has to do with anything, I just thought it was interesting.
 

Epicenter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
1,003
Reaction score
376
Age
56
Hard to argue with.

I've been watching some science vlogs lately. I like the ones about the nature of reality. Some theorize that we are living in a simulation (probably BS). There's another theory that we're living in a hologram. Not in the sense that it is being projected, but in the sense that our universe is really two dimensional but it holds the illusion of being three dimensional, like one of those 3D puzzle pictures that used to be popular. This has something to do with matter being imprinted on the flat surface of a black hole's event horizon.

Not sure what that has to do with anything, I just thought it was interesting.
Yes intelligent people say it's even probable. If we would live in a extremely advanced civilization I think we would happily go there. That's kind of the case with computer games already.

Sometimes people take live to serious. People are addicted to equality. I think we are very similar on the quantum level probably. It might not console to many people but maybe some.

Bottom line reality is not real. If reality is all you have you are a prisoner of you mind. To get back to the topic. Reality is not the only thing that counts. You can be happy with little things. Fighting for justice has it's place but it is sometimes healthy to be outcome independent, process oriented not always goal oriented.You got to trick your mind sometimes.
 

eli77

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 7, 2013
Messages
2,704
Reaction score
595
Location
Miami fl
you have to look at what new jersey did as an example they did the right thing
 

Xenom0rph

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 12, 2017
Messages
1,907
Reaction score
2,437
Minneapolis' city council just voted to defund the police dept, however it is unlikely to be approved via general ballot in the November election - it's just a virtue signalling move from the city council....

I'll probably make a separate thread about it later but right now I'm heading to the gym to get some leg day action.....
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,329
Reaction score
6,875
Yes intelligent people say it's even probable. If we would live in a extremely advanced civilization I think we would happily go there. That's kind of the case with computer games already.

Sometimes people take live to serious. People are addicted to equality. I think we are very similar on the quantum level probably. It might not console to many people but maybe some.

Bottom line reality is not real. If reality is all you have you are a prisoner of you mind. To get back to the topic. Reality is not the only thing that counts. You can be happy with little things. Fighting for justice has it's place but it is sometimes healthy to be outcome independent, process oriented not always goal oriented.You got to trick your mind sometimes.
Process oriented?

That's what fvcks up everyone here, they're too focused on the process but ignores the results and keeps on talking about process, for example all those nerds here that can't get laid but talks endlessly about how to approach women.

You should be goal oriented - > come up with ideas/mindset shift - > fine tune the process.
 

Epicenter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
1,003
Reaction score
376
Age
56
Process oriented?

That's what fvcks up everyone here, they're too focused on the process but ignores the results and keeps on talking about process, for example all those nerds here that can't get laid but talks endlessly about how to approach women.

You should be goal oriented - > come up with ideas/mindset shift - > fine tune the process.
Ok let's say your goal is to be happy.

Or to give more detail:
You want to go through life with a smile. Having a song on the lips. Having easy and fun life.

How would you do that?
 

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,329
Reaction score
6,875
Ok let's say your goal is to be happy.

Or to give more detail:
You want to go through life with a smile. Having a song on the lips. Having easy and fun life.

How would you do that?
Result (happy) = Mindset shift/how you think - > process/how you do things.

How you think will always influence how you do things.

In the end, the results one gets in life is a reflection of how one thinks.
 

Epicenter

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2020
Messages
1,003
Reaction score
376
Age
56
Result (happy) = Mindset shift/how you think - > process/how you do things.

How you think will always influence how you do things.

In the end, the results one gets in life is a reflection of how one thinks.
I ment like:

Teacher: what is 2x2 ?
pupil: it's how you think that gives you the answer
Teacher: wtf
 

Spaz

Banned
Joined
Jan 14, 2018
Messages
8,329
Reaction score
6,875
I ment like:

Teacher: what is 2x2 ?
pupil: it's how you think that gives you the answer
Teacher: wtf
So you want an answer on how to be happy, expecting a process, a step by step ritual, without taking into account of ur inherent personality, ur upbringing and how you currently think ?

My bad, I forgot to mention all those things above will influence how you actually act in real life, and that decides whether u r happy or not.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

Read more...

Top