Next date with her friends?!

[Dextervex]

Hey,

I have a woman in my life which I initially saw as a friend. After some talking and nonsense games we started doing fun activities together like once a month for about 4 months. Last time I tried to initiate some physical contact which she neither declined nor returned. This time I was trying to set up a date in the nature which is not just a fun activity for friends. She responded that she wanted do to hang out with two of our mutual friends (her best girl friend and a friendzoned guy) at her place and that I should join them.
I don’t know why she did that

1. she didn’t want to say that she sees me as just a friend so she tries to subcommunicate it since we always met one-on-one before
2. I still didn’t communicate my intentions clear enough and she really wanted to do something with her friends that day
3. she may feel unsecure since I started to reveal my intentions after threatening her as just a friend for several weeks
3. she wants to test me

Should I just tell her that I dont want to meet up with that group and that we can hang out some other time?
I really don’t want to go there which may seem like I’m unflexible or egoistic but I don’t want to walk into this „trap“. In my opinion only a beta malewould agree to this.

 

[RangerMIke]

2. I still didn’t communicate my intentions clear enough and she really wanted to do something with her friends that day

My best guess is this is what happened. you need to make it clear you are not interested in being 'just buddies', and a source of non-sexual validation. One of two things will happen... If she feels the chemistry, she will make herself available. If isn't feeling it she will not invite you into gay male girlfriend BS as described above. When you first meet a chick you can either be her friend or a dude she is fvcking, you can turn a chick that you are fvcking into a real friend, but it's a one way street that does not work both ways.

 

[highSpeed]

Hey,

I have a woman in my life which I initially saw as a friend. After some talking and nonsense games we started doing fun activities together like once a month for about 4 months. Last time I tried to initiate some physical contact which she neither declined nor returned. This time I was trying to set up a date in the nature which is not just a fun activity for friends. She responded that she wanted do to hang out with two of our mutual friends (her best girl friend and a friendzoned guy) at her place and that I should join them.
I don’t know why she did that

1. she didn’t want to say that she sees me as just a friend so she tries to subcommunicate it since we always met one-on-one before
2. I still didn’t communicate my intentions clear enough and she really wanted to do something with her friends that day
3. she may feel unsecure since I started to reveal my intentions after threatening her as just a friend for several weeks
3. she wants to test me

Should I just tell her that I dont want to meet up with that group and that we can hang out some other time?
I really don’t want to go there which may seem like I’m unflexible or egoistic but I don’t want to walk into this „trap“. In my opinion only a beta malewould agree to this.

I think it's likely you've been friendzoned as well. I suppose there might be a small possibility that you can get out of that jail, but it has to be soon. If you go more than 6+ months in the friendzone, it's established. It sounds though, that you've had too much interaction without trying to signal sexual interest, that she's firmly planted you in the friendzone. You can try and escalate but it appears as if your advances have been rebuffed, not good. I think you waited too long already.

number one is your most likely choice, don't lie to yourself about 2-4. If she rebuffed you, she knows exactly what you want. That offer she gave out is bullsh*t and a way to let you down easy or signal right back at you that you are in friendzone jail, but she'd be happy to tell you all about her adventures skiing down cawk mountain.

 

[glass half full]

Is this a pattern among all her friends that you are around? Like, is this thing the two of you are playing, like one big bunch of "friends only".

This sounds like a group mentality thing, aka organized cautious feminism, best way I can describe it. Been there long ago, nothing good came out of it. Basically it was a big sh!t test, one which I couldn't pass. Looking back, I couldn't pass it had I done everything right...It's difficult to explain rationally, so I won't. Basically a dead-end street, which is better not trying to figure it out.

Be busy, find other pastures to lay in. If you are truly friends, then just hang out, but do things on "your time", iwo don't be their bytch.
Have fun and go along. But if they aren't for you, just move on.

 

[glass half full]

There's something in the Don Juan Bible about this...about no matter where you are, keep your frame.

This instance you speak of, is a perfect example of women setting the frame. Look it up on the DJ Bible, it explains much better.

 

[Alvafe]

better to go for something else then just talk, try to be physical, maybe try to kiss her after, since they are your friends too.

this setting make it funny though I had something like this, for sometime, pretty much I have 2 friends who are a couple and in every once in a while they invite me and another gril i'm friends with to have some wine and eat and talk, just the 4 of us, I know both this couple would like me and that girl together, but i'm fine the way i'm now, so not interested, and things happen just like that we go have some fun, normally since I like driving I pick her up since she did live close to me so it was not a hassle.

but IF I wanted something, I would try to do it after the "event" and before I deliver her in her home.