ChristopherColumbus
Master Don Juan
The coffee is a safe bet until you know she is fun. It is a quick convenient way to screen a woman you have just met [through cold approach]. If you find her to be fun, then you take her somewhere fun next time.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
For date-coffee or drink
- Thread starter Darrenez
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
I don't worry about her being fun. I decide my own fun and take her with me.
If you like cold approaching and going to coffee shops that's you.
I don't have time for that unless it's a part of something better I'm doing.
I also don't have time to walk.up to strangers and just ask them out. I've got other things to do.
ChristopherColumbus
Master Don Juan
- Plenty of times I've stated I don't do the classic cold approach... I just naturally meet woman in the course of my day
- You don't want a wet rag hanging around you at a fun event. It may prevent you from meeting a more fun person
Never had that problem as I get to.know a chick before we go out. And if she was a wet rag? She can go get coffee to liven up while I finish doing what I'm doing.
@ChristopherColumbus don't forget you are in Korea mate. An American girl is going to need a little Kickstarter to get her motor running
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
ChristopherColumbus
Master Don Juan
Yes, was at a bar the other week with an American lass. Was propositioned on the way home in the taxi, but sadly I was simply not attracted to her. She was too much of a 'mate'. Nice to friend-zone a woman for a change! ha ha
Compare that to a coffee date in the weekend. The Korean lady arrives late, which was fine as was working on a poem. Anyway, perhaps due to the poetic flow, we were well-engaged in a bubble within all of 5 minutes of meeting. A quick coffee, and then to the park. Unfortunately, it was a bit public as it would have been perfectly fine to have commenced kissing.