So I am alone with a girl and my head just runs through all the possibilities of sex and what not. How do I get out of my head and not feel so anxious during these moments. Whenever I feel like the vibe is getting closer and closer to something happening, I get more anxious. Probably because my personality type is that I normally think through almost everything I do in advance to executing the task. I'm someone that wants to know how things will turn out, but I guess sex is something where I can't map out all my moves. So please I'd like some advice. I was thinking about meditating more as a way to clear my mind.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
How do I get out of my head during pivot moments
- Thread starter AlphaNoob
- Start date
"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
daddymonsterpoodle
Master Don Juan
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Get to it.... Lose yourself in the sensation
Meditation might help. Didn't help me much.
Meditation might help. Didn't help me much.
icantgetlaid
Senior Don Juan
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Alcohol
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
I get you... I'm the same way.
Recently, I've had to keep reminding myself that things are not always as they seem. And, planning should have the flexibility to let things unfold naturally. Things change in unpredictable and unplanned ways.
Some things, are out of our hands/minds.
Roll with the punches!!!
Recently, I've had to keep reminding myself that things are not always as they seem. And, planning should have the flexibility to let things unfold naturally. Things change in unpredictable and unplanned ways.
Some things, are out of our hands/minds.
Roll with the punches!!!
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Yeah.
I could say: "take it all with a grain of salt". Or I could say: "Assume that any pvssy is extra pvssy" (Outcome independence in game parlance).
But what you really need is experience. It might sound ironic, but the easiest way to become less nervous is to simply fvck less intimidating girls first, and work your way up to the better looking ones.
Some might argue against this, claiming that fvcking subpar women is like convincing yourself that you're not worth the higher tier women, but I believe it can be worth it as long as you simply see them as a sacrifice, lol.
My friend and I always joke that it's good karma too, lol. If you fvck a subpar woman now. Who knows, maybe a higher tier woman will stroke her heart and give you a chance at that pvssy too, out of the goodness of her heart. xD
I could say: "take it all with a grain of salt". Or I could say: "Assume that any pvssy is extra pvssy" (Outcome independence in game parlance).
But what you really need is experience. It might sound ironic, but the easiest way to become less nervous is to simply fvck less intimidating girls first, and work your way up to the better looking ones.
Some might argue against this, claiming that fvcking subpar women is like convincing yourself that you're not worth the higher tier women, but I believe it can be worth it as long as you simply see them as a sacrifice, lol.
My friend and I always joke that it's good karma too, lol. If you fvck a subpar woman now. Who knows, maybe a higher tier woman will stroke her heart and give you a chance at that pvssy too, out of the goodness of her heart. xD
TheMonkeyKing
Master Don Juan
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- Apr 20, 2014
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- 2,327
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In the moment have a whole bank of go-to stock questions to initiate small talk with. These obviously need to be pre-planned and replenished.
It's not the first time I have posted this, and it probably won't be the last. It simply says what we need to do, far better than I've ever heard or read before....
Litany against fear; from Dune, by Frank Herbert
"I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
This is quite apt; though I would personally revise. More generally, I have been practicing allowing stress and anxiety wash and pass over me when they arise. It means first acknowledging when it happens, but then realising that 99 times 100, you are in absolutely no inherent danger whatsoever.
It's not the first time I have posted this, and it probably won't be the last. It simply says what we need to do, far better than I've ever heard or read before....
Litany against fear; from Dune, by Frank Herbert
"I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain."
What is fear? It's anticipating what's going to come next........
Not what's happening NOW.....
You are close with mediation......mindfulness is about being in the moment......how many of your friends eye color are you
sure of? practice noticing people's eye color in every conversation...........
notice your friends' skin. their teeth. Their skin. Do they need dental work?
Now, really notice their use of language? strange expressions? lots of swearwords?
Notice their clothes.......do they match their personality?
Can you see how this practice brings you so much into the present and out of yourself?
As a byproduct you'll become so much more observant and interesting
Not what's happening NOW.....
You are close with mediation......mindfulness is about being in the moment......how many of your friends eye color are you
sure of? practice noticing people's eye color in every conversation...........
notice your friends' skin. their teeth. Their skin. Do they need dental work?
Now, really notice their use of language? strange expressions? lots of swearwords?
Notice their clothes.......do they match their personality?
Can you see how this practice brings you so much into the present and out of yourself?
As a byproduct you'll become so much more observant and interesting
This is what I needed. Thanks
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
marmel75
Master Don Juan
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- Jan 4, 2012
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When you act, there is no time for thinking. When you think there is no time for action.
One way will get you laid and way won't. You know which way doesn't already, so focus on the way that does.