wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Anyone else get turned off by jealously shiit tests? I mean, loyalty is close to the top of the list of qualities us men look for!
Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single
She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.
You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.
The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.
Speaking of shiit tests...
- Thread starter wifehunter
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"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Yeah, I hear you!!!
I will give it to the ladies though, it's a great way to get to know someone. Kind of like a stress test. Assuming you are quality, and she finds out by testing, the benefits are staggering!!!
But, too much is to much!
My last test or tests, was fuking brutal. I could never see a test any worse. She must really love me. But, I'm glad she's gone for now!!! When I think of her, I have mixed feelings. In the future she'll need to qualify herself. "Turn about, is fair play"
Shift
Don Juan
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Sure, it makes perfect sense why they do it. I think realize it or not, as we get better with girls we kinda sh!t test them too. Helps you screen for crazy needy behavior.
But after a certain point I feel like I'm just a circus animal jumping through hoops and I won't put up with that.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Just say NO to hoops... Yeah, ghosting/nc is the best course of action in that case. I've been a ghost for two months. Halloween lasted extra long this year! Feels great!
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
With ALL women.. your finger should always be hovering over the eject button.
Where most men lose their leverage and give away their power is by always looking for excuses to stay with a woman while women are always looking for excuses to leave a man (hypergamy). When you reverse this pattern while spinning plates.. women cling like glue. Its so easy from a technical stand point. But most men are too emotionally weak to operate this way because they're giant co-dependent white knights.
Where most men lose their leverage and give away their power is by always looking for excuses to stay with a woman while women are always looking for excuses to leave a man (hypergamy). When you reverse this pattern while spinning plates.. women cling like glue. Its so easy from a technical stand point. But most men are too emotionally weak to operate this way because they're giant co-dependent white knights.
sazc
Master Don Juan
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everytime you guy talk about women putting you thru hit test, and you describe those tests, it just sounds to me like these are either insecure women, or just dont know how to/are afraid to communicate their needs to you. that's not me saying that women are never **** testing by design, I just wonder how many of their insecurities come out as **** tests, and they dont even recognize it
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Yes, insecurities are a high probability. And, yes, they don't know how to communicate their needs. And yes, they are clueless to the fact, also. It's when the pain of loss overcomes them, they finally open their mouths.
Be excellent, and be gone!
Roober
Master Don Juan
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Couldn't agree more! I would be willing to bet that most attractive women HB7 and above are actually insecure. And this ties into the jealousy. I probably had 5 different occasions with my ex where she got jealous. It wasn't outrageous, but she made subtle comments. The worst part is, none of those occasions did I flirt or do anything in front of her and the women were less attractive.
sazc
Master Don Juan
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When I see you guys discuss this topic, I do wonder to myself - where are your "standards"?. My knee jerk is to ask you to call her on her sh1t and explain you don't deal in passive aggressive bu11**** and, if she has any needs, or concerns, she needs to TALK to you about them.
But I know it's all easier said than done...
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Yes, getting to the bottom of the issue is tough because of the emotional air around it. Sometimes, I can't find the words. I have trouble dealing with my own emotions. Having to deal with another's emotions gets overwhelming at times.
So, when they pout, I get quiet, and do nothing. Talking instead of pouting is a much more mature and problem solving response. The pouting isn't so cute anymore. Thanks!
Roober
Master Don Juan
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Agreed! If there was one thing we didn't ever do was talk. We would have a conversation, but then nothing came of it. I would dig and dig, and she would say she needs time to process or think about it... then never bring it up again...
Until she decided it was over... her lack of really communicating what was going on should have been a big red flag. I mostly got the "your not used to being alone" (because I had only been divorced a couple months) and "I have been single for a while, and I like my independence"