wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Anyone else get turned off by jealously shiit tests? I mean, loyalty is close to the top of the list of qualities us men look for!
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Speaking of shiit tests...
- Thread starter wifehunter
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"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Yeah, I hear you!!!
I will give it to the ladies though, it's a great way to get to know someone. Kind of like a stress test. Assuming you are quality, and she finds out by testing, the benefits are staggering!!!
But, too much is to much!
My last test or tests, was fuking brutal. I could never see a test any worse. She must really love me. But, I'm glad she's gone for now!!! When I think of her, I have mixed feelings. In the future she'll need to qualify herself. "Turn about, is fair play"
Shift
Don Juan
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Sure, it makes perfect sense why they do it. I think realize it or not, as we get better with girls we kinda sh!t test them too. Helps you screen for crazy needy behavior.
But after a certain point I feel like I'm just a circus animal jumping through hoops and I won't put up with that.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Just say NO to hoops... Yeah, ghosting/nc is the best course of action in that case. I've been a ghost for two months. Halloween lasted extra long this year! Feels great!
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
With ALL women.. your finger should always be hovering over the eject button.
Where most men lose their leverage and give away their power is by always looking for excuses to stay with a woman while women are always looking for excuses to leave a man (hypergamy). When you reverse this pattern while spinning plates.. women cling like glue. Its so easy from a technical stand point. But most men are too emotionally weak to operate this way because they're giant co-dependent white knights.
Where most men lose their leverage and give away their power is by always looking for excuses to stay with a woman while women are always looking for excuses to leave a man (hypergamy). When you reverse this pattern while spinning plates.. women cling like glue. Its so easy from a technical stand point. But most men are too emotionally weak to operate this way because they're giant co-dependent white knights.
sazc
Master Don Juan
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everytime you guy talk about women putting you thru hit test, and you describe those tests, it just sounds to me like these are either insecure women, or just dont know how to/are afraid to communicate their needs to you. that's not me saying that women are never **** testing by design, I just wonder how many of their insecurities come out as **** tests, and they dont even recognize it
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Yes, insecurities are a high probability. And, yes, they don't know how to communicate their needs. And yes, they are clueless to the fact, also. It's when the pain of loss overcomes them, they finally open their mouths.
Be excellent, and be gone!
Roober
Master Don Juan
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Couldn't agree more! I would be willing to bet that most attractive women HB7 and above are actually insecure. And this ties into the jealousy. I probably had 5 different occasions with my ex where she got jealous. It wasn't outrageous, but she made subtle comments. The worst part is, none of those occasions did I flirt or do anything in front of her and the women were less attractive.
sazc
Master Don Juan
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When I see you guys discuss this topic, I do wonder to myself - where are your "standards"?. My knee jerk is to ask you to call her on her sh1t and explain you don't deal in passive aggressive bu11**** and, if she has any needs, or concerns, she needs to TALK to you about them.
But I know it's all easier said than done...
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Yes, getting to the bottom of the issue is tough because of the emotional air around it. Sometimes, I can't find the words. I have trouble dealing with my own emotions. Having to deal with another's emotions gets overwhelming at times.
So, when they pout, I get quiet, and do nothing. Talking instead of pouting is a much more mature and problem solving response. The pouting isn't so cute anymore. Thanks!
Roober
Master Don Juan
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Agreed! If there was one thing we didn't ever do was talk. We would have a conversation, but then nothing came of it. I would dig and dig, and she would say she needs time to process or think about it... then never bring it up again...
Until she decided it was over... her lack of really communicating what was going on should have been a big red flag. I mostly got the "your not used to being alone" (because I had only been divorced a couple months) and "I have been single for a while, and I like my independence"