You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
That's a pretty good point. SayWord? I'm assuming that the girls respect your diligence in school, but they probably don't see you as a potential romantic partner. This is just me talking out of experience, though. I wouldn't overanalyze this phrase since it doesn't really show interest nor disinterest. It sounds too much like a variation of the dreaded "you're a nice guy, but..." phraseDJDamage said:Notice they didn't say " You will make a real good boyfriend"?
i'm not a pushover at allDJDamage said:Notice they didn't say " You will make a real good boyfriend"?
They are basically saying that some woman is going to pull the wool on you and you will do whatever it takes to make her happy. If you are the kind of guy that can be a pushover consider that a warning.
Jerks or players are never get called "you would make a good husband" but that doesn't mean the girls don't stop hooking up with them or try to change them.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Hello!Jitterbug said:Just say "thanks, and I think you'd make a good wife".
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
... and a good sandwich, oh btw, I'd like a beer too."Jitterbug said:Just say "thanks, and I think you'd make a good wife.
the nail in the coffinbmxcetera said:You're not the type of guy I'd date, you're the type of guy I'd marry!
You're sexually a dud. You're not fun to be with. But you are... 'nice'.
A friend of mine responded to this line with, "And you're not the type of girl I'd marry, but you would be the type for a one night stand!
-----credit needs to be given here to Pook for posting this and it's in the bible
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.