You will never be successful with women until you learn to love yourself

[CornbreadFed]

You were dealt a hand by whatever God or random explosion you believe in. Successful men learned to play the cards they were given. Failed men cried because they were not handed a Royal Flush.

Unless you were born neurodivergent, physically scarred, or under five foot five, most of your excuses can be disproven just by stepping outside and seeing what is possible.

Being yourself got a bad rap because of one girl you had a crush on in high school or college. Newsflash it was just one girl. Ditch the scarcity mindset. Focus on improving yourself not trying to become someone else.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Being yourself is typically an excuse most guys make to be the lesser version of themselves, not the improved, optimal version.

That's the problem. The men who take the feedback they get and use it to evolve into the version of themselves that closes in on their potential are the ones who were never people who believed in "just being themselves", because who they were was always evolving in a positive direction.

Being comfortable with being uncomfortable in your daily existence due to pushing yourself outside your comfort zone should be something every man aspires to.

You are either evolving or devolving. If you think you are standing still, you are actually devolving.

 

[Travel memoir21]

I see this site as a Self improvement site first, the girls will come and go should be complimentary to your purpose and service to your community. As far as loving yourself first, the best way to do that is self acceptance or self validation and loving your flaws and your past. We are all unique in the sense that all of us have a lot of things in common but at the same time, we all have a particular talent or an expertise or experience in a particular matter and that is what sets us apart. So learn to love your flaws, be an active member in your community and have fun with whatever project your embarking.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Female attraction is almost always circumstantial, I think with most hot girls it matters very little about who a man is as a person , we know this because we know some women will happily break any rule for a male of perceived high status.

The club promoter Is going to get more shots at pu$$y than any guy working in a law firm

The random cousin of a hot chick is going to get more chances to hit than the random on a swipe app

Her Ex will get more lee way than any new guy on the scene

A dude thats within the social circle has more chance than someone she met in a bar

This is just the reality of women , they tend to be highly reactive to social circumstances.

I've said before but the best strategy a man can have is too make himself positively familiar with both her and her friends.

 

[BPH]

Being yourself is typically an excuse most guys make to be the lesser version of themselves, not the improved, optimal version.

That's the problem. The men who take the feedback they get and use it to evolve into the version of themselves that closes in on their potential are the ones who were never people who believed in "just being themselves", because who they were was always evolving in a positive direction.

Being comfortable with being uncomfortable in your daily existence due to pushing yourself outside your comfort zone should be something every man aspires to.

You are either evolving or devolving. If you think you are standing still, you are actually devolving.

You've been dropping bangers lately. Almost everything you've been saying the last few posts I've looked at I'd say I agree with.

Taking the words right out of my mouth.

 

[Plinco]

You've been dropping bangers lately. Almost everything you've been saying the last few posts I've looked at I'd say I agree with.

Taking the words right out of my mouth.

Being yourself is typically an excuse most guys make to be the lesser version of themselves, not the improved, optimal version.

That's the problem. The men who take the feedback they get and use it to evolve into the version of themselves that closes in on their potential are the ones who were never people who believed in "just being themselves", because who they were was always evolving in a positive direction.

Being comfortable with being uncomfortable in your daily existence due to pushing yourself outside your comfort zone should be something every man aspires to.

You are either evolving or devolving. If you think you are standing still, you are actually devolving.

"Your comfort zone is death"

--Plinco 11/26/25

https://www.sosuave.net/forum/members/plinco.55571/

 

[BackInTheGame78]

"Your comfort zone is death"

--Plinco 11/26/25

https://www.sosuave.net/forum/members/plinco.55571/

I'm not sure what you are trying to say...I have posts talking about this in other threads from before that all the way back to 2024

 

[CornbreadFed]

You are either evolving or devolving. If you think you are standing still, you are actually devolving.

This is why your environment and who you choose to have around you are important.

 

[Plinco]

I'm not sure what you are trying to say...I have posts talking about this in other threads from before that all the way back to 2024

I've been saying things like that since at least 2015, so there...

I'm the self-development king! I'll out-develop your butt any day of the week.

 

[Gamisch]

You were dealt a hand by whatever God or random explosion you believe in. Successful men learned to play the cards they were given. Failed men cried because they were not handed a Royal Flush.

Unless you were born neurodivergent, physically scarred, or under five foot five, most of your excuses can be disproven just by stepping outside and seeing what is possible.

Being yourself got a bad rap because of one girl you had a crush on in high school or college. Newsflash it was just one girl. Ditch the scarcity mindset. Focus on improving yourself not trying to become someone else.

You might wanna be "someone else" as we will always change form. You can't be the same person you were 10 years ago.
Imo it's not too bad to say " I wanna be xyz type of guy within 5 years".

Too many guys are completely dependent upon women to determine their own value in life. But, the magic REALLY starts happening when you get to a point where your accomplishments form your image. And yes women will come.

 

[jhonny9546]

or under five foot five

I'm excused haha!

Anyway one thing that I've learned along the way, for LTR'S, I'd love to share:
Initially, I thought of this as very cringe, in fact when I saw women behaving this way, it made my blood boil, and I became avoidant, because I knew what they were doing... anyway, they all will do it. It's their nature.

You love yourself as a man. You also have your life plan and things you want to do in life.
Then, you will face women who will constantly test their man to make sure he's still a safe partner.
Keeping peace and making small concessions will be a huge turn-off for them, and once she loses attraction, there's no going back.
As men, we like to talk logically, and we also love when another person agrees with us, or that we can show someone to agree with us.
Women LIKE being contradicted by their man; there's no greater turn-on for them.
Just be authentic and clearly communicate what you want.
Conflict is welcome; it's an opportunity to grow and become more intimate with each other.
I know you don't want to have conflict as a man, but simply put in the woman's mind, she needs that conflict to give herself a reason to respect you even more, and therefore feel attraction to you, after she calms down.

It's as if she wants something from you that you think is wrong and you deny it, then she gets angry because you don't understand, but you stand firm, and a few hours later she'll be all over you.

It's not a healthy or toxic relationship; it works that way with all women.
Then there are extreme lows and extreme highs.