"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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You know the score, just need help... Again

lil hooligan

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Right guys here's the deal I'm 17 she's 17
 
We went to highschool togeather I liked her and she liked me but we never got togeather because other stuff was always getting in the way

Anyway I'm in the army and obviously don't get home much but I am home this weekend (Friday night -Sunday afternoon

I was on facebook to her about a week ago and found out she has a bf but I asked her if she would like to go for a coffee when I am next home and she was hesitent because of her bf but I convinced her anyway because I said just as friends

and this is where I as for your help you see of course I need to call her and arrange something but there's my problem what should I say when I call her and what should I say at the actual, dare I say... date 

Please guys don't hesitate to ask for more info and thanks in advance ;)
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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lil hooligan

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Do the highly improbable, get out of the friendzone, get the girl who has a bf and hold down a relationship while in the army
 

Tesl

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lil hooligan said:
Do the highly improbable, get out of the friendzone, get the girl who has a bf and hold down a relationship while in the army
Sounds like its probably more effort than its worth to me.

I don't think there is any special advice for this situation, just treat here as you would any other potential girl.
 

Kailex

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lil hooligan said:
I was on facebook to her about a week ago and found out she has a bf but I asked her if she would like to go for a coffee when I am next home and she was hesitent because of her bf but I convinced her anyway because I said just as friends

and this is where I as for your help you see of course I need to call her and arrange something but there's my problem what should I say when I call her and what should I say at the actual, dare I say... date 

Please guys don't hesitate to ask for more info and thanks in advance ;)
I'll chalk it up to you being 17 and inexperienced, but as a previous poster said already: What's the point, you stuck yourself in the friendzone?

She accepted because you said it would be as "FRIENDS" so she's expecting no more than just coffee. (BTW, you're 17... coffee???)

Don't be surprised when you try to kino or go in for a kiss and she gives a weird look or even a "What are you doing?".

You set yourself up for a disappointment.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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lil hooligan

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So you think I should leave it... But I like a good challenge
 

lil hooligan

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Anyone???
 

Remy

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Just hang out as friends. Treat her as you would any of your other dude friends (but do stuff you want to do, not go shopping and boring girlfriends stuff)

If you remain cool and aloof, she should fall for you (unless youre just a terrible person in general)

's worked for me more than a couple times. When you put them in the friend zone first youve got all the power imo (in my opinion)
 

CarlitosWay

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lil hooligan said:
Do the highly improbable, get out of the friendzone, get the girl who has a bf and hold down a relationship while in the army
You're inexperienced and young :p. Hold down a healthy relationship while away in the Military? Give me a break kid, there's husbands and wives who barely can even achieve this (most don't)and you're going to try to do it with a young 17 year old girl? This isn't Hollywood. If you have any self respect and respect for this girl, you'll leave her alone and go chase single horny broads. You set yourself up with losing odds.

Go have some coffee, have fun, be funny, be a man and network with her and meet her friends. She surely must have quite a few, she is after all a girl.
 

mikeyb

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It would have been a long shot even if you hadn't said you just wanted to be friends. Now that you've said it it's pretty much impossible. Give it a year or two, go after other girls, if after that you still think this one is "the one" you can always give it another try.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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ArcBound

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go to the archives, there is a guide on getting out of the friendzone
 
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