"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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You know the score, just need help... Again

lil hooligan

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Right guys here's the deal I'm 17 she's 17
 
We went to highschool togeather I liked her and she liked me but we never got togeather because other stuff was always getting in the way

Anyway I'm in the army and obviously don't get home much but I am home this weekend (Friday night -Sunday afternoon

I was on facebook to her about a week ago and found out she has a bf but I asked her if she would like to go for a coffee when I am next home and she was hesitent because of her bf but I convinced her anyway because I said just as friends

and this is where I as for your help you see of course I need to call her and arrange something but there's my problem what should I say when I call her and what should I say at the actual, dare I say... date 

Please guys don't hesitate to ask for more info and thanks in advance ;)
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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lil hooligan

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Do the highly improbable, get out of the friendzone, get the girl who has a bf and hold down a relationship while in the army
 

Tesl

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lil hooligan said:
Do the highly improbable, get out of the friendzone, get the girl who has a bf and hold down a relationship while in the army
Sounds like its probably more effort than its worth to me.

I don't think there is any special advice for this situation, just treat here as you would any other potential girl.
 

Kailex

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lil hooligan said:
I was on facebook to her about a week ago and found out she has a bf but I asked her if she would like to go for a coffee when I am next home and she was hesitent because of her bf but I convinced her anyway because I said just as friends

and this is where I as for your help you see of course I need to call her and arrange something but there's my problem what should I say when I call her and what should I say at the actual, dare I say... date 

Please guys don't hesitate to ask for more info and thanks in advance ;)
I'll chalk it up to you being 17 and inexperienced, but as a previous poster said already: What's the point, you stuck yourself in the friendzone?

She accepted because you said it would be as "FRIENDS" so she's expecting no more than just coffee. (BTW, you're 17... coffee???)

Don't be surprised when you try to kino or go in for a kiss and she gives a weird look or even a "What are you doing?".

You set yourself up for a disappointment.
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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lil hooligan

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So you think I should leave it... But I like a good challenge
 

lil hooligan

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Anyone???
 

Remy

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Just hang out as friends. Treat her as you would any of your other dude friends (but do stuff you want to do, not go shopping and boring girlfriends stuff)

If you remain cool and aloof, she should fall for you (unless youre just a terrible person in general)

's worked for me more than a couple times. When you put them in the friend zone first youve got all the power imo (in my opinion)
 

CarlitosWay

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lil hooligan said:
Do the highly improbable, get out of the friendzone, get the girl who has a bf and hold down a relationship while in the army
You're inexperienced and young :p. Hold down a healthy relationship while away in the Military? Give me a break kid, there's husbands and wives who barely can even achieve this (most don't)and you're going to try to do it with a young 17 year old girl? This isn't Hollywood. If you have any self respect and respect for this girl, you'll leave her alone and go chase single horny broads. You set yourself up with losing odds.

Go have some coffee, have fun, be funny, be a man and network with her and meet her friends. She surely must have quite a few, she is after all a girl.
 

mikeyb

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It would have been a long shot even if you hadn't said you just wanted to be friends. Now that you've said it it's pretty much impossible. Give it a year or two, go after other girls, if after that you still think this one is "the one" you can always give it another try.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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ArcBound

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go to the archives, there is a guide on getting out of the friendzone
 
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