AlmostThere!
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Nov 1, 2009
- Messages
- 244
- Reaction score
- 2
Just do a search on my name and you'll see all the pathetic threads I've created. But this thread is different. I want to say thanks to all the members that offered me good advice.
I was very depressed. I thought that I wasn't attractive enough, tall enough, big enough, and everything else that can kill a man's confidence. But taking advice from the members who had some sense about the game has really paid off.
As you know (or may not know), I went to a singles event last Friday. I ended up with two phone numbers (even though I didn't go there to get phone numbers, but just to practice) and went out dancing with one girl. She invited ME out dancing.
I'm a black guy, and thought that Asian and Indian girls were pretty much off limits (especially to black guys). But these two girls are Asian and Indian. These girls are also HOT (by my standards). Slim, pretty faces, and great personalities.
The girl I went out dancing with calls me a day and half later, asked me what I'm doing this weekend, told me her weekend plans, and said she'll call me back middle of the week. I haven't been officially invited out, but she's probably just checking with friends to see if it's cool for her to bring a guy.
I called the other girl the day after we met at the event because she didn't have her phone, but she gave me her phone number. I left a brief voicemail telling her who I was and that we should chat sometime. She didn't call me back, so I deleted her number after 2 days (that's my personal rule...no return text/call after 2 days, delete the number). But I get home from work today and get a phone call and it was her! We talked for about 10 minutes. I made her laugh (always good) and I said we should hang out after work tomorrow. She agreed to it, but it was an 'on the spot' date request, so I didn't have a place in mind. She ends the call by saying "I'll be waiting for your call".
My old self would have been obsessing over the second girl. But I left that one voicemail and forgot about her. I passed her first "test" by not calling again.
So, I have two "plates" spinning right now and I'm not even chasing. They both proved their interest by calling me back. Both girls asked what I was doing this weekend.
So, if the first girl never calls me back with plans for this weekend, then that's cool. Actually, it's cool if they both flake. I now have confidence that I can attract a girl enough that she'll call me. Then I can work on getting them to actually commit to a date. The next step would be getting a second date, then makeout, then sex, then a LTR...you get the picture.
I wanted to repeat some stuff that you all have been telling me for weeks/months now:
1. Put yourself out there. Socialize. You're not going to meet girls during your trip to WaWa.
2. When you socialize, be yourself and have fun. Being yourself means getting out of your head and living in the moment. Stopp thinking what's the right thing to say or do at every moment.
3. Smile and be approachbale. If you never had a girlfriend, never had sex, or never even held a girl hand...go into each social opportunity with the mentality that it will be the first time you can hold a girl hand or kiss a girl. Don't socialize with the past on your shoulders because girls will sense that and avoid you.
4. Don't worry too much about IOIs if you're average looking. Girls will blatantly stare down hot guys or guys driving Lamborghinis. Always make sure you look clean and you dress in moder clothes that fit. I'm not an advocate of telling every guy to get big and hit the gym. If you like being slim, then be proud of being slim. Getting big will attract the girls that like big guys but alienate the girls that like normal guys. Think of the guy that likes big tits and only dates girls with big tits. A girl is the same way. When she finds another guy that's bigger or has a better physique, she'll drop you compared to a girl that likes you even though you're skinny/slim/fat. But really fat is bad, so lose the excessive weight.
I don't think that I need this board as much anymore. I've been here a lot longer than a few months, and I read so many books on this subject that it's time just to be me. I will surprise myself when I react correctly in a situation because I subconsciously remembered something I've read.
I hope someone who is equally depressed as I was can understand being depressed won't help anything. You CAN turn your life around. You won't get every girl you lay eyes on, but you will start having women in your life. Like I've realized older girls are attracted to me more. I'm 25 and the females I met are 29 and 30. I'm gonna stop trying to get college girls, because for whatever reason...they're just not that attracted to me. It'd be great if I meet a college girl that's into me, but I'm going to focus my efforts on attending events and having hobbies where I can meet women my age or older.
So, thanks again...I will be checking this thread...feel free to post your thoughts.
I was very depressed. I thought that I wasn't attractive enough, tall enough, big enough, and everything else that can kill a man's confidence. But taking advice from the members who had some sense about the game has really paid off.
As you know (or may not know), I went to a singles event last Friday. I ended up with two phone numbers (even though I didn't go there to get phone numbers, but just to practice) and went out dancing with one girl. She invited ME out dancing.
I'm a black guy, and thought that Asian and Indian girls were pretty much off limits (especially to black guys). But these two girls are Asian and Indian. These girls are also HOT (by my standards). Slim, pretty faces, and great personalities.
The girl I went out dancing with calls me a day and half later, asked me what I'm doing this weekend, told me her weekend plans, and said she'll call me back middle of the week. I haven't been officially invited out, but she's probably just checking with friends to see if it's cool for her to bring a guy.
I called the other girl the day after we met at the event because she didn't have her phone, but she gave me her phone number. I left a brief voicemail telling her who I was and that we should chat sometime. She didn't call me back, so I deleted her number after 2 days (that's my personal rule...no return text/call after 2 days, delete the number). But I get home from work today and get a phone call and it was her! We talked for about 10 minutes. I made her laugh (always good) and I said we should hang out after work tomorrow. She agreed to it, but it was an 'on the spot' date request, so I didn't have a place in mind. She ends the call by saying "I'll be waiting for your call".
My old self would have been obsessing over the second girl. But I left that one voicemail and forgot about her. I passed her first "test" by not calling again.
So, I have two "plates" spinning right now and I'm not even chasing. They both proved their interest by calling me back. Both girls asked what I was doing this weekend.
So, if the first girl never calls me back with plans for this weekend, then that's cool. Actually, it's cool if they both flake. I now have confidence that I can attract a girl enough that she'll call me. Then I can work on getting them to actually commit to a date. The next step would be getting a second date, then makeout, then sex, then a LTR...you get the picture.
I wanted to repeat some stuff that you all have been telling me for weeks/months now:
1. Put yourself out there. Socialize. You're not going to meet girls during your trip to WaWa.
2. When you socialize, be yourself and have fun. Being yourself means getting out of your head and living in the moment. Stopp thinking what's the right thing to say or do at every moment.
3. Smile and be approachbale. If you never had a girlfriend, never had sex, or never even held a girl hand...go into each social opportunity with the mentality that it will be the first time you can hold a girl hand or kiss a girl. Don't socialize with the past on your shoulders because girls will sense that and avoid you.
4. Don't worry too much about IOIs if you're average looking. Girls will blatantly stare down hot guys or guys driving Lamborghinis. Always make sure you look clean and you dress in moder clothes that fit. I'm not an advocate of telling every guy to get big and hit the gym. If you like being slim, then be proud of being slim. Getting big will attract the girls that like big guys but alienate the girls that like normal guys. Think of the guy that likes big tits and only dates girls with big tits. A girl is the same way. When she finds another guy that's bigger or has a better physique, she'll drop you compared to a girl that likes you even though you're skinny/slim/fat. But really fat is bad, so lose the excessive weight.
I don't think that I need this board as much anymore. I've been here a lot longer than a few months, and I read so many books on this subject that it's time just to be me. I will surprise myself when I react correctly in a situation because I subconsciously remembered something I've read.
I hope someone who is equally depressed as I was can understand being depressed won't help anything. You CAN turn your life around. You won't get every girl you lay eyes on, but you will start having women in your life. Like I've realized older girls are attracted to me more. I'm 25 and the females I met are 29 and 30. I'm gonna stop trying to get college girls, because for whatever reason...they're just not that attracted to me. It'd be great if I meet a college girl that's into me, but I'm going to focus my efforts on attending events and having hobbies where I can meet women my age or older.
So, thanks again...I will be checking this thread...feel free to post your thoughts.