Would you flirt with someone

[DJnoob]

who you're not attracted to???

Or would you flirt with a chick just to play games and still not be attracted?

 

[FrustratedChump]

Why not? Its good practice, as long as you dont lead them on, I see no harm.

 

[DJDamage]

Men don't flirt.

You can be your charming self and treat everyone the same.

Don't try your game on chicks you don't want to pick up, its counter productive.

Only go after chicks you are into and use C&F, negative hits and kino to let them know you are a sexual being and not afraid to show it.

 

[Triple X]

Men don't flirt.

I disagree. I flirt a lot of the time - its fun. Makes the day that bit brighter for both people.

But would I do it to someone I'm not attracted to?? Probably not.

Would you have sex with someone your not attracted to?? Not unless very drunk, right?!?

Same with flirting.

 

[Alpine]

When I was clueless, I'd flirt with old Grannies to get the practice. You could just about make out the glint in her misty eye.

No point nowadays apart from perhaps making some fatty's day.

Flirting is a skill, a subtle communication that needs honing.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by DJDamage
Men don't flirt.
...

Don't try your game on chicks you don't want to pick up, its counter productive.

...

Why not?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Triple X
I disagree. I flirt a lot of the time - its fun. Makes the day that bit brighter for both people.
...

I feel the same way. I flirt so much it's just a part of my character. Like you I do it mainly because it feels good to make others feel good. Plus it's a key skill in being charismatic. It also makes it easier to hit on a HB if it's already a natural part of who you are.

 

[DJDamage]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
Why not?

Why would you want to hit on chicks you are not intersted in? If you have got a problem with picking up chicks you are intersting in then this is counter productive. You should try picking up chicks you are attracted to so if you fail you will LEARN FROM THIS and then you will be able to go at it better the second time around until it becomes the norm.

Being comfertable around unattractive chicks does not change anything.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by DJDamage
Why would you want to hit on chicks you are not intersted in? If you have got a problem with picking up chicks you are intersting in then this is counter productive. You should try picking up chicks you are attracted to so if you fail you will LEARN FROM THIS and then you will be able to go at it better the second time around until it becomes the norm.

Being comfertable around unattractive chicks does not change anything.

You still haven't explained why it's counter productive. And in explaining that, explain why a DJ would choose to be a DJ with only certain people? Wouldn't this be counter productive in that if a guy isn't a complete DJ, he'd be just pretending to be one? And what's the difference between women you're attracted to as apposed to women you aren't? Aren't women just women, no matter what? What would be the difference in categorizing them? Wouldn't that be putting forth a ton of effort that could be a waste of time rather than just approaching and being your charming self? Which brings up another thing, what purpose would it serve not to market yourself completely? Everyone talks about social proof, why discriminate against someone who could put in a good word for you to her HB friends? Have you actually thought this out?

 

[belividere]

I'm with Francisco on this and I know we've discussed this before.

Being a flirt, or being a charmer is who I am. I dont do it to lead girls on who I'm not attracted to. It has actually been a terribly productive method for me. Since I do it without thinking I have done it to some hotties when I'm not trying to pick them up only later to hook up with them. And I have been in many situations like franscisco has said were I charmed an average girl and gotten to meet her friends. You gotta remember this is a lifestyle, really its a full time job. You dont want to be leading on or hooking up with girls who aren't attractive but keeping congruent with everyone is not going to negatively affect anything.

 

[DJDamage]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
You still haven't explained why it's counter productive. And in explaining that, explain why a DJ would choose to be a DJ with only certain people? Wouldn't this be counter productive in that if a guy isn't a complete DJ, he'd be just pretending to be one? And what's the difference between women you're attracted to as apposed to women you aren't? Aren't women just women, no matter what?

Counterproductive definition - "Tending to hinder rather than serve one's purpose."

The question raised by the orignial thread maker was: would you flirt with a chick you are not intersted in??

By flirting he convays that he wants to practice his skills on a chick in order to raise her interest level in him but he does not want to get with her. Why would you do such a thing? By raising the interest level of an unattractive chick in which you are comfertable talking to, in a sense believing that you are doing well
and convincing yourself that you CAN DO THE SAME THING WITH A CHICK YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO AND WANT TO PICK HER UP. This is essence hinders your skills in the long run, and therefore its COUNTERPRODUCTIVE. The orignal poster is a self admitted not a DJ and therefore he has steps to go in order to be comfertable with everyone not just unattractive females.

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
What would be the difference in categorizing them? Wouldn't that be putting forth a ton of effort that could be a waste of time rather than just approaching and being your charming self? Which brings up another thing, what purpose would it serve not to market yourself completely? Everyone talks about social proof, why discriminate against someone who could put in a good word for you to her HB friends? Have you actually thought this out?

We always put the women into different catagories: ATTRACTIVE AND UNATTRACTIVE. Its true that when you are a DJ, it shouldn't matter of how you treat them UNLESS YOU ARE SERIOUSLY TRYING TO RAISE INTEREST LEVEL FOR THE SOUL PURPOSE OF DATING THEM, then of coarse you would treat them differently. I doubt you can control your brain from flooding you with images of you wanting to fvck her or control the increase beating of your heart, in your mind you are already treating her differently.

Social proof is important but I never said to "discriminate against someone". If you are your charming self then be like that with everyone. Women are the one who flirt, and a man does not need to. This topic was already disscused before and the following people can explain it better then I can.

Deep Dish -

Women are almost always the true initiators, not the man. She initiates, you respond. She volleys hints for you to approach, you approach. (Or, she gravitates towards you, you talk). She flirts, you ask her out. Bada bing!

AD-

Flirting was invented by women as an attention-seeking device. Society tells a woman that it is improper to ask a man out. So women flirt to get your attention to let you know, non verbally, of their ROMANTIC interest in you.

It is not necessary for a man to flirt. He doesn't have to 'telegraph' his romantic interest . That's because HE does the asking out. Men are very confused in this area. Flirting is for women.

You 'telegraph' your romantic interest in a woman by asking for her HOME phone number. That is the male 'flirting' so to speak.
When you ask for the number she will automatically know you are interested in her romantically.

If you don't ask, you are in danger of falling in the friend zone. That's because you didn't 'flirt' by asking for the number.
You didn't let her know your true feelings: To ask her out.

Survivor -

I don't think you all get the jist of what Anti-Dump was trying to state. While he did say that he was against flirting, read his entire reply and you'll comprehend that he was only against it for the sake "telegraphing" romantic interest.

Flirting and kino are fine, but only if its a genuine part of your personality, and not just some empty tactic used for the slim hope that her IL will raise. In the case of flirting and kinoing just to impress a girl, Anti-Dump was right. Flirting would just be another form of supplication.

However, if you develop yourself such that you are naturally open and comfortable with women, kino and flirting become apart of your true personality, and is not just some "weapon in your DJ arsenal". Women can tell the difference.

I don't think AD was against flirting, but rather against tactical flirting just for sake of impressing women. Whether or not you follow AD's advice depends alot on your level of experience and your ability to control your own emotions.

In conculsion, if you have no problems talking to everyone then you can "flirt" with every chick you meet regardless if you are attracted to her or not If however you are inexperienced with gaming attractive women and you are selective in your "flirting" then don't do it.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by DJDamage
...In conculsion, if you have no problems talking to everyone then you can "flirt" with every chick you meet regardless if you are attracted to her or not If however you are inexperienced with gaming attractive women and you are selective in your "flirting" then don't do it.

So you're saying if you are inexperienced and unsure about yourself and your DJ skills, you should practice approaching attractive women even though they probably make you nervous and the chances of rejection is high and you would probably get embarrassed with the rejection. No big deal, right?

 

[DJDamage]

Originally posted by Francisco d'Anconia
So you're saying if you are inexperienced and unsure about yourself and your DJ skills, you should practice approaching attractive women even though they probably make you nervous and the chances of rejection is high and you would probably get embarrassed with the rejection. No big deal, right?

Will approaching unattractive women give you experience? yes if you can't attract anything with two legs. Will that experience transcent into attracting women who the same individual find attractive?? no.

Rejection by a hot chick is better then an acceptence by an unattractive chick because it will keep you motivated to try your best. You already know that you are not really trying with an unattractive chick and you are faking it , progress is not made.

 

[crotchrocket]

People that know me, often ask me "...do you flirt with every female you meet...?" and you know what? I guess I do.

It has become part of who I am. Do I do it intentionally? NO! Do I look at a chic that I'm not attracted to and say to myself "I'm going to go and flirt with her - for practice"
OF COURSE NOT !

But if you are charming to EVERY female you meet, including the homely ones, don't think for a minute that the hottie standing five feet behind you didn't notice it.

Social Proof, Practice, Just being Don Juan, who cares what you call it. Charm is UNIVERSAL.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by DJDamage
...
Rejection by a hot chick is better then an acceptence by an unattractive chick because it will keep you motivated to try your best. You already know that you are not really trying with an unattractive chick and you are faking it , progress is not made.

Does anyone else believe this?

 

[coolguy676767]

I would flirt with just about everyone in my age range at least, its nice, hones your skills, helps you be charismatic, its kind of fun, and what wrong with just being nice to someone even if you dont want to pick them up.

Its not counter productive by the way, counter productive would mean it would hurt or hinder your chances with more attractive girls, even if you say it wouldnt help with hot girls, I think it does, but even if it didnt, it wouldn't be counter productive unless it hurt chances with other girls, hence the definition.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Here's something that happened to me today. I was in a sporting goods store looking at bike shorts. A little shorty (and I do mean shorty 4'10) came up to me and asked if I needed help. I politely said no and thanked her. She pointed out the fitting rooms and left on her merry way. I thought to myself that she just wanted to see me in spandex...

I kept browsing and not more that two minutes later she comes back and comments about a pair and how they were "my style." I thought it was a cheesy pickup line but I thought what the hell, at least she's trying. We started talking and in 10 minutes we felt like old friends (she's a cyclist too).

I had to leave for another appointment so I thanked her and was going to take my leave. She asks if I was going to buy a pair of shorts. I told her that the price was a bit much especially for last year's design. I thought that would can her sale for sure but surprised the hell out of me by offering to buy the sorts for me using her employee discount. My first thought was that it would be only 10 or maybe 15% off at best. She tells me that they get a 30% discount! I'm like SOLD!

I grab a couple of pairs and she rings it up. I saved almost $100 off my bill! She gives me the receipt and as I'm thanking her she points out that I shouldn't be alarmed to see her name on the receipt. She looks at it at says "Oh, there's one thing wrong, my number isn't on there." She writes down her number and tells me that I should call her sometime when I decide to wear the shorts so that she could come along just to make sure they worked well for me. I told her that I just might take her up on it.

Maybe I should write a book called "Flirting for fun and profit".

 

[Fatality]

and then when some girl flirts with you guys for fun you come crying about how much you hate women

 

[DJnoob]

hehe, nice bro.. Yes, ive been flirting with even unattractive chicks, it does help help you prepare for the hot ones and helps you slowly build your ego. I say, do it all the time!

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Originally posted by Fatality
and then when some girl flirts with you guys for fun you come crying about how much you hate women

That only happens to guys that every woman that gives him a second look is obviously interested in him. You're just talking about guys that have delusions of reality. Not everyone can be satisfied with a little harmless flirting. It's probably because they wear their hearts on their sleeves.