I went to a party this past weekend that my friend threw and he introduced me to a couple of his friends. I hit it off with one of his friends, a girl, but I didn't ask for her number. I found her on facebook and thought about messaging her. What do I have to lose?
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
would this be creepy?
- Thread starter Jason#4
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Fred Da Head
Master Don Juan
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Did you look her up by name, or did you see her on another friend's page?
It'd be easy to brush off the "I looked you up" factor by saying "I saw your post on so-and-so's wall and figured I'd drop you a line." ...And even then, most likely it won't even come up.
It'd be easy to brush off the "I looked you up" factor by saying "I saw your post on so-and-so's wall and figured I'd drop you a line." ...And even then, most likely it won't even come up.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
Yep, creepy. Ask your friend how you could catch up with her again. At least when you do connect again it won't seem as if you were secretly stalking her.
Fred Da Head
Master Don Juan
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On second thought, what Francisco said.
I only use Facebook for my actual friends, anyways.
I only use Facebook for my actual friends, anyways.
Lord Shinra
Senior Don Juan
Do it the old fashioned way. Run into her somewhere again.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Play the Game
Master Don Juan
Leave the online stalking to women...
Thanks for the input guys. I looked her up on my friend's friend list...maybe I can wait until she posts on his wall? Or...my friend throws a party every month or so, I'll just ask him to invite her again. I'm thinking the latter.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
Good gosh man, tomorrow just ask him where you could find her so you can get down to business. No waiting for her to post something, no waiting for some other party, no thinking of some other non-direct way of hooking up with her. JUST DO IT! :woo:Jason#4 said:
MooseGod
Master Don Juan
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Don't be a dumbass! If she likes you then it doesn't matter how you get a hold of her, short of appearing outside her bedroom window at 3AM.
Bible_Belt
Master Don Juan
Don't be a dumbass! If she likes you then it doesn't matter how you get a hold of her
bingo
bingo
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
War Against Betaism
Master Don Juan
Dude, just do it. Every time I meet a new person at a party, and don't ask for their number, I always look on the friend that introduced me to her/them friend's list and just add them. Sometimes they even add me first.
jesusrules
Senior Don Juan
I think its fine. Its not like your knocking on her door. If she gets creeped out by that then shes dumb dude.