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Women flaking

Rocnavy

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So this woman I work with has a significant other but claims she cant end it due to financially dependence. We went out on couple dates and was supposed to go out again but she cancel on the last mintue twice. I simply stated no problem just let me know when your free. I see her at work and she would call my extension for things she can do herself but I do it since its work related. Finally yesterday she call and stated hey stranger my phone number hasnt changed and I replied mines didnt neither so hit me up when u figure out your schedule and she said alright with an attitude. Any input on why she doing this?
 

AttackFormation

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We went out on couple dates and was supposed to go out again but she cancel on the last mintue twice.
If she wanted to fvck you, she would have within this point assuming you aren't utterly clueless to escalation.

Finally yesterday she call and stated hey stranger my phone number hasnt changed and I replied mines didnt neither so hit me up when u figure out your schedule and she said alright with an attitude.
She wants you to keep validating her by hitting her up. It doesn't boost her ego the same way if it's her putting in the effort and giving her pvssy up by herself.

Any input on why she doing this?
She is toying with you for validation.
 

logicallefty

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Welcome to the forum. I agree with @AttackFormation she is seeking your validation. She is probably having a lot of emotional ups and downs with her significant other and when she needs her ego stroked by a man, you are part of her orbit to do that. You are probably not the only one she is talking to. Women associate with men for three general reasons, and in her case, it's most likely:

RESOURCES: The significant other is providing that.

SEX: Some other Chad besides you is tapping the well, or maybe multiple

ATTENTION: An orbit of other men who aren't tapping the well. If you haven't tapped her yet, this is where you stand.

You tried and she flaked. I wouldn't waste any further time on her. You deserve better.
 

Barrister

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So this woman I work with has a significant other but claims she cant end it due to financially dependence. We went out on couple dates and was supposed to go out again but she cancel on the last mintue twice. I simply stated no problem just let me know when your free. I see her at work and she would call my extension for things she can do herself but I do it since its work related. Finally yesterday she call and stated hey stranger my phone number hasnt changed and I replied mines didnt neither so hit me up when u figure out your schedule and she said alright with an attitude. Any input on why she doing this?
First off, this is a co-worker and you shouldn’t be dating her in the first place for very obvious reasons. Second, she’s clearly conflicted on what she wants no matter what she says - whether it is for “financial dependence” reasons or (more likely) simply trying to decide if she wants to stay in the relationship.

She’s cancelled twice now. I think you move on period because she’s a co-worker but if you insist on seeing her in some capacity I would say only for sex because she clearly is conflicted and it will be a major headache if you’re trying to do anything more than that. But regardless she has to show more effort now before you do anything because she’s flaked twice.
 

AttackFormation

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One more thing... if you feel her behavior is confusing, that's exactly the point. Obviously women who want to toy with you for validation and entertainment (chronic needs for women) wont come out and say that, because then they couldn't get what they wanted out of the man. If you had a clear idea of what you want and whether her behavior is giving you that, she couldn't toy with you, and they know that. The confusion is the aim.
 

Rocnavy

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First off, this is a co-worker and you shouldn’t be dating her in the first place for very obvious reasons. Second, she’s clearly conflicted on what she wants no matter what she says - whether it is for “financial dependence” reasons or (more likely) simply trying to decide if she wants to stay in the relationship.

She’s cancelled twice now. I think you move on period because she’s a co-worker but if you insist on seeing her in some capacity I would say only for sex because she clearly is conflicted and it will be a major headache if you’re trying to do anything more than that. But regardless she has to show more effort now before you do anything because she’s flaked twice.
I appreciate your response so Im done chasing for sure.
 

Suave88

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So this woman I work with has a significant other but claims she cant end it due to financially dependence. We went out on couple dates and was supposed to go out again but she cancel on the last mintue twice. I simply stated no problem just let me know when your free. I see her at work and she would call my extension for things she can do herself but I do it since its work related. Finally yesterday she call and stated hey stranger my phone number hasnt changed and I replied mines didnt neither so hit me up when u figure out your schedule and she said alright with an attitude. Any input on why she doing this?
Hello,

I typically search for keywords in threads before answering. I also read other member's replies. I correct my replies a lot.

You have not indicated you are her boyfriend or lover. Only that you went out twice because you are dating her. I don't believe you made up with her just yet.

You said she told you " she has a significant other but claims she cant end it due to financially dependence." This is private information here, so I assume there is compenetration at some level. At this point, you may have or may not have made up. I don't believe so.

She told you already your place. She is not in love with her provider. He is a tool, a sugar daddy. So, unless, you can supersede him, she won't leave him.

Why she canceled twice? Because you are second in line. Imagine she asks you to give her your car. This is your mean of transport and you don't have another. How do you commute for work and fun?

So if she canceled twice is because she had to do some with her significant someone.

Your reply was " I simply stated no problem just let me know when your free." This reply indicates you like her to some extend. You are flexible. I would have simply reply "ok" or "well, if that is what you want, ok"

I see her at work and she would call my extension for things she can do herself but I do it since its work related. She makes up excuses to see you. She is indirect, so she likes you.

So she called you yesterday and stated hey stranger my phone number hasnt changed and I replied mines didnt neither so hit me up when u figure out your schedule and she said alright with an attitude.

Validation, validation, validation, validationvalidation,validation,validation, validation from you. She knows you like her. You are flexible for her.

"I replied mine didnt neither so hit me up when u figure out your schedule" I would have simply reply "mine neither" but you added " so hit me up when u figure out your schedule"
at this point you clearly indicate her she can canceled on you last minute as many times as she wants and you are not supposed to be upset. Again, you are flexible.

Any input on why she doing this?

She has a financial provider, and if you want her, you need to work around her schedule, but don't make implications to her that you are available and too flexible.

I don't know why you keep going out on dates without making up, but in my experience, I don't wait too much to kiss a woman after my second date with her. I don't care how much she likes me or knows me.

In my experience, I have ****ed married coworkers and it was easy for me to kiss on first lunch outside the office and have her give me head after 5:30PM on the same or following day of the same week.

I would keep playing with her, but next time you head out on a date with her, make sure you make up. Later on, she should give you head, and eventually intercourse.

My I understanding is that she is looking for validation because you have not made up just yet. So why keep on going out if you don't fvcking make a move and kiss thebytch.
 
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Rocnavy

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So your saying she wont go out with me in the future cause I wont make out with her. She never gives me the indication to kiss so basically im supposed to not give a **** and just start kissing her?
 

Suave88

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So your saying she wont go out with me in the future cause I wont make out with her. She never gives me the indication to kiss so basically im supposed to not give a **** and just start kissing her?
I knew you had not made up with her just yet. I can sniff it from here and I don't know where you are and how far you are from me.

No, I mean you are supposed to act. If you go out again, just fvcking act. She called you and told you her phone has not changed! That means she is interested in going out again. So, fvcking ask her out again! You should have asked her out when she called you.
This is your coworker, you see her on a daily basis, so ask her out for lunch outside the office, make sure there are no other coworkers around and kiss the bytch. Find a moment when people are not looking or the dining room is empty. Kiss the fvcking bytch. Alternatively, ride in one car!

I don't know when but you should know when to act. When she is asking you to help her at work is a good moment.

For example.... "Tell her in person, I am helping you out a lot. It is time for you to take me out to lunch today"

If a woman is going out with you is for a reason.
Some women are obvious. I have had chicks that kissed me first and I never thought that they were interested in me, but went out with me.

She told you already "he is a sugar daddy" no desire, no love! She does not like him, but he provides. So, screw him!

So, kiss her the next time you go out. If you are shy, ask her to go to the movie theater, and fvcking kiss her!

You won't lose anything, a lot more has been lost in wars!
 
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Rocnavy

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Lol dude whoever you are I need yo mother ****ing energy. But what about me hollering at other women will that work? Im in Louisiana tho
 

Suave88

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Lol dude whoever you are I need yo mother ****ing energy. But what about me hollering at other women will that work? Im in Louisiana tho
Do not compete with her. She can do this too. She can fake an attraction for another coworker to impress you. Then, you very likely to start a dangerous cycle.

Just ask her out and try to kiss her. if she refuses, then call it NEXT! and move on! An attempt to kiss her is all the validation she needs in case she is not sure about you.
 

Rocnavy

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Naw I dont try to compete with her but I believe she be trying to make me jealous. She told me about a dude she found handsome and I didnt even react to it.
 

Suave88

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Lol dude whoever you are I need yo mother ****ing energy. But what about me hollering at other women will that work? Im in Louisiana tho
So there is a handsome dude, a financial provider, and you.....
What is this.....??? Is this a 3 or 4 some??? Is that what this is????
Is she making a star constellation????

How old is this girl and how old are you? You know her DOB??? Have you found her Facebook account yet, have you Google her name???
Does she wear a ring? Does she talks to some1 on the phone, during break time or calls from the office. Does she mentiones her husband....
 

Rocnavy

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Im 32 shes 43 and no I havent found her fb account. She was telling me a handsome guy she seen on the job where we work at but I didnt react to it
 

Suave88

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Im 32 shes 43 and no I havent found her fb account. She was telling me a handsome guy she seen on the job where we work at but I didnt react to it
Do this. Type in her "first name in Louisiana" in the facebook browser. For example "sosuave88 in Louisiana" you should see a list.
There is no fvck dude. She is messing with your brain. She wants you to make a move. When did she tell you about the other dude?
There may be no financial provider either. Some women use names and mention people to boost their value because they don't want to say they are alone. But this chick may be as single and bored as fvck.
 

Suave88

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Im 32 shes 43 and no I havent found her fb account. She was telling me a handsome guy she seen on the job where we work at but I didnt react to it
Question
Has she asked you any personal questions?
 

Rocnavy

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Yep she asked me how many women Ive slept with and if Im messing with somebody on da job cause she dont want to get into it with no one on the job.
 

KindredSpiritzz

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I dated someone I worked and learned first hand why its not a good idea to date co workers. Relationship went south thru no fault of my own and now she acts like I did something to her, stomps around, goes out of her way to be mean to me and makes it very uncomfortable in the work place. She was dynamite in bed but it wasn't worth this day to day stress and hassle seeing her every day now.
My advice is leave her alone, she already sounds a bit crazy to begin with.
 
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