Lexie
Don Juan
Well, aren't you glad you posted then? Now it's 7 pages.Don Juanabbe said:Yes, you are.
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Well, aren't you glad you posted then? Now it's 7 pages.Don Juanabbe said:Yes, you are.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Lexie said:Thanks for the welcome!
I do think that a lot of barriers are subconscious. Women don't sit around and talk about the test they threw out at this guy who tried to hit on them earlier, and somehow if it was something that was planned I'm pretty sure they would. Most of these barriers could probably be seen as some sort of defense mechanism, or a selection method to weed out males that don't pass, and, believe it or not, some of them are actually flirting. If you can keep your composure long enough for her to feel like you're an ok guy, she'll put down the barriers and you should be able to have a normal conversation. On the other hand, if you get rattled pretty easily, she may think you're not worth the trouble. So yeah, I guess that does sort of go along with your theory.
PhatE1vis said:LL - what did he call you on and how did he do it so it made you laugh? Give specifics, maybe we can all learn something.
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
I think a lot of rather inflammatory, offensive statements guys make are actually accurate; they're just too blunt. They need to be rephrased in a kinder, more restrained way, to suit your feminine sensibilities. Like, instead of "attention hore," you're a lady who takes great joy in answering many, many questions on behalf of the female gender. :yes:Lexie said:You post the inflammatory response and I'm the "attention hor"? Please.
Before we start another "Us against Them" rant, why not challenge the specific things that you don't agree with instead of just blaming an entire gender. We challenge one another all the time (or maybe it's just me, eh...Statix said:I think Lexie proves, once again, that we should never, ever take advice from a woman on women (or at least how to get women).
Just read through the entire thread. Other guys have done a better job pointing out fallacies in her responses than I could, (or have the energy to, at least).Francisco d'Anconia said:Before we start another "Us against Them" rant, why not challenge the specific things that you don't agree with instead of just blaming an entire gender. We challenge one another all the time (or maybe it's just me, eh...), so why not challenge the specifics?
Yeah, I know it takes a lot of effort. But I think that it would be beneficial to post if you have something that wasn't mentioned earlier or if you just want to comment on it. I'm not against women posting as long as we can keep them honest..Statix said:Just read through the entire thread. Other guys have done a better job pointing out fallacies in her responses than I could, (or have the energy to, at least).![]()
I like his response - pretty funny. So, did you mean it as a test? How would you have felt if he agreed to let you pick up lunch instead?LovelyLady said:He plays hockey and asked me to lunch and ice skating.
I said "Ice skating sounds like a blast, but I'll spring for the lunch okay?"
He said "No."
I was surprised and asked "No?"
He said "No. And if you keep doing all your little tests, I'm going to have to bend you over my knee and give you a spanking." !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!LOL!!!!!!!!!!!
---added/edited---
I am now thinking that if we are looking at all this through the lens of a test, then I guess his response was a test for me too, huh?
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Don Juanabbe said:At least make it worthwhile and post some pics of your tits.
DELILAH said:I agree. Which is why I joined too.
I did not intend it as a pass/fail test outright/consciously, but I did find out (gathered the information) that he is traditional. Mind you, I speak only for myself, but I feel like when a man agrees to let me pay, it puts me on equal footing with him. It feels more like a friendship/business thing, which is okay, but is not the same as having the man be the Man, if that makes sense.PhatE1vis said:I like his response - pretty funny. So, did you mean it as a test? How would you have felt if he agreed to let you pick up lunch instead?
BenPW-DJNewbie said:Right, firstly, I find it bloody hilarious, the type of questions you guys are asking. Any question you could ask a woman, and it's about towels and s**t. LMAO.
Anyway, I guess my questions are:
Do you, as a woman, believe it is possible to get out of the LJBF zone, because every girl I tell them I like them, they see me as a friend. So, I'm wondering, if there is, what it is?
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
The Loacker said:So it was a test. Heh, I find it interesting how women do this subconsciously, yet you are so aware of the point of it. You won't call it a "test", but basically if he had agreed to let you pay, you wouldn't have seen him as a romantic interest.
Wow. That is a powerful question. Let me reflect and get back to you... I am also curious what the other women have to share on this. I want to know how old Lexie is - I am wondering if our "tests" are different because of our age difference.The Loacker said:Alright, let me ask you this then: what do you see as dealbreakers, other than pussification (read: indecisiveness, clinginess)? It doesn't have to be one characteristic that's a dealbreaker in and of itself, but that when combined with others would really turn you off.
It's refreshing to hear that a woman couldn't rattle of a list of "don't wants" or deal breakers right off the top of her head. So many women focus on what they don't want that they seldom can say what they really want beyond the same old dried out cliches.LovelyLady said:Wow. That is a powerful question. Let me reflect and get back to you... I am also curious what the other women have to share on this. I want to know how old Lexie is - I am wondering if our "tests" are different because of our age difference.
It's because they don't know or can't admit what they want. They go in with veggies and rice on the list and walk out with candy and soda in the shopping cart.Francisco d'Anconia said:.... they seldom can say what they really want .....
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.