“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Woman's Point of View
- Thread starter Lexie
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Well you did say the approaching guy would be unsuccessful if he was "creepy" or "desperate". You called it a "dealbreaker". Which means he hadn't done anything to break the deal prior and there was still a deal to break prior. Then here you gave two reasonable examples of a guy being creepy or desperate, but these are different scenarios than a guy in the first example approaching with a compliment and you judging him "creepy" or "desperate" just from his appearance right away. You're bebopping and scattering around the real issue now, kind of like a few other female posters do on here btw, but I'm not going to push the issue because to your credit your reply was nice and feminine enough.lexie said:
Randallpink83
Master Don Juan
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Also, about Youtube clips. I just watched the first one and then had to stop, because otherwise I might start throwing up. What bothered me is the subtext that a man should constantly adapt to a woman.
So if she says to me "no", I have to first be a mind-reader and figure out whether it is a "real no" or "not right now no", and then do what she wants me to do (for example, talk some more so that she "gets more information" or that she "sees how am I gonna act" - so she rejects me to see how am I gonna take it - if this is not a blatant test then I don't know what it is.)
But DJism and real-world experience are teaching us that if you do what it appears she wants you to do, you're screwed, because she's in control. Furthermore, where is what *I* want? Most of the time when I listen/read women talking about man-female dynamics, it always have to be the her way. (I'm talking about first contacts, not long term relationships)
So if the guy is a second too early/too late, he will be rejected just because "she's not in the moment". Or, she gets a "he's creepy" vibe, and it's all over. Can you imagine the world if the guys would behave the same way? There would be no couples!
Like ketostix said, I think this is something that's in female subconscious and they don't really realize it. It's like women have a psychological blind spot about it. Also, many times women give advice that is great for long term relationship, but for the dating stage is contra productive. So to answer that lady's question about what do I do when I stroke her and she's unresponsive:
1. If we're in LTR, I will try to connect.
2. If we're together a couple of weeks, YES, I will go watch football.
What are your thoughts on the matter, Lexie?
Apparently, some girls will think you're a wimp for not pushing right away. But I think with most girls, you can just back off for a while.
BTW, I think you've never been successfully cold approached! That guy who talked to you in class was IN THE SAME CLASS, and thus not a totally random stranger.
What I wouldn't give to have a female classmate, a female co-worker, or to go to a conference and see a female. I haven't met a female through my career or education in 10+ years. So many spoiled sods on here don't realize how good they have it.
Lexie
Don Juan
1. Yes. I think attraction happens regardless of your "attachment" to another person. If you're unsatisfied in a relationship, I think your eyes are more likely to wander, but general attraction happens no matter what. You can appreciate a nice looking guy when you see him, and I have a flirty personality, so I do like just talking to guys - it's fun. But as for serious attraction, no. If I get to where the attraction reaches a certain point I make an effort to physically not put myself in a situation where I could allow those feelings to grow. It's a matter of being committed.DavenJuan said:
2. I think most girls who go out to bars in groups are there to check out the guys, but there may be the odd female in the group who just needs time with the girls. I don't know that I would go so far as to say they're looking to "hook up" though. Maybe just some dancing and flirting...
3. "Mr. Smooth"s tend to rub me the wrong way. I would prefer a direct "hey, I saw you from across the room and couldn't stop staring at you. Could I take you out for coffee tomorrow night?" to some line.
4. No. If you need to cheat you shouldn't be in the relationship.
Lexie
Don Juan
I think I'm going to need a representative picture for each rating. And if I'm the one doing the rating, it's never going to be accurate. All girls will tell you they have "4-days" and "10-days". And then there's a matter of your personal tastes and my self-deprecation...Nighthawk said:
I know it sounds like it, but I promise I'm not trying to be evasive! To prove it, here are some stats:
height: 5'5.5"
weight: 108
hair: long (almost waist) dark brown, hints of red, know to change at any moment.
eyes: big, green or brown, depending on what I'm wearing
Overall, I think I've got a lot going for me and I'm cute. But I would be at a complete loss to give you a # rating, especially since I was totally the awkward kid all throughout high school and it takes a while to get rid of that mentality.
Lexie
Don Juan
I wouldn't ever think of a guy who doesn't push as a wimp. I would think he was one of the few males that knows how to listen. And that shows that he can put his wants on hold for a second and respect me.Phyzzle said:
You may be right, but it was the very first day of class. It probably helped his case that I was completely petrified and felt really out of place in the class.
Wow, what industry are you in?
"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Lexie
Don Juan
...ketostix said:
Lexie
Don Juan
Actually, yeah, I agree with your responses.Brutus said:
Lexie
Don Juan
Lol, thanks. You're right, my 'creepy' example was a cold-approach, but the 'desperate' one wasn't. I'm not trying to bebop (lol, haven't heard that word in awhile), so I'll try to put it as simply as I can:ketostix said:Well you did say the approaching guy would be unsuccessful if he was "creepy" or "desperate". You called it a "dealbreaker". Which means he hadn't done anything to break the deal prior and there was still a deal to break prior. Then here you gave two reasonable examples of a guy being creepy or desperate, but these are different scenarios than a guy in the first example approaching with a compliment and you judging him "creepy" or "desperate" just from his appearance right away. You're bebopping and scattering around the real issue now, kind of like a few other female posters do on here btw, but I'm not going to push the issue because to your credit your reply was nice and feminine enough.
Almost everything depends on the "vibe" you get from a cold-approacher, but the fact is, his delivery, physique, dress, manner, tone of voice, eye-contact, smell, the location, and your mood all add up within a few seconds to tell you whether prolonging a conversation with this guy is good idea or not. Sometimes you're right, sometimes you're wrong. And there's always a deal to break whether one has been made or not.
Why a guy cold-approaches, he could do the same thing to the same girl on two different days and get conflicting responses. So yes, a lot is contingent on the guy making it work, but there are factors that are entirely out of their control. All a guy can do is what works for most girls most of the time, which for me, is respect (non-pushiness, no foul language, no eyeballing) and a friendly, casual manner.
BlackJackal
Master Don Juan
Lexie
Don Juan
I don't have a problem with it, mainly because I don't think guys should have problems with a girl wanting to stay single. I think problems arise here when you've got a couple that's been dating for a while and the girl wants to turn it into a relationship, while the guy might want to just keep it casual because he's dating around and doesn't want to get tied down. And then the girl's reaction would most likely be due to the fact that it really feels like a personal slap in the face like this guy is saying to you "hey, you're great to hang out with sometimes and I like you, but not enough to give up all other girls for you." It's a jealousy problem. She really likes the guy and want him to like her just as much.BlackJackal said:
I think this is why it's important to be up front about what you're wanting out of a relationship fairly early on in the dating process. If you just want to date around, but the girl you've been taking out wants a LTR, you've got to let her know ASAP that that's not what you're looking for and it's nothing personal about her, just where you're at in your life.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
iqqi
Master Don Juan
It also show that he isn't desperate, or a slave to sex. Which is a huge turn on.Lexie said:
Don Juanabbe
Master Don Juan
Lexie
Don Juan
Thanks for the welcome!The Loacker said:Alright so here's my question. I know you don't like to refer to tests as "tests", but rather as "barriers", but either way what are your thoughts on them? I mean we have our own theory on why women throw out tests (basically testing to see if the man is really a man, or just an AFC in disguise), but I'm interested in what women are thinking when they throw out these tests. Do they even realize they're testing? Is it subconscious? Etc...
Welcome to the forum by the way.
I do think that a lot of barriers are subconscious. Women don't sit around and talk about the test they threw out at this guy who tried to hit on them earlier, and somehow if it was something that was planned I'm pretty sure they would. Most of these barriers could probably be seen as some sort of defense mechanism, or a selection method to weed out males that don't pass, and, believe it or not, some of them are actually flirting. If you can keep your composure long enough for her to feel like you're an ok guy, she'll put down the barriers and you should be able to have a normal conversation. On the other hand, if you get rattled pretty easily, she may think you're not worth the trouble. So yeah, I guess that does sort of go along with your theory.
Lexie
Don Juan
You post the inflammatory response and I'm the "attention hor"? Please.Don Juanabbe said:
Don Juanabbe
Master Don Juan
Yes, you are.Lexie said:
“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”
Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.
I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.
Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules. Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.