Woman I am dating has spent ZERO on me/us

[GotED?]

Simple start, simple result:

You spoiled her - irreversible. Next.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Been dating this chick for couple months. She complains she has no money yet buys clothes for herself fairly often (at discount), is taking a trip soon that will cost some $2,000, and pays for yoga etc. I don't mind paying more than she does since I know I make more than her, but at this point she needs to start paying something. I'm giving her until the end of the year since she goes on her vacation soon after - if she doesn't fork over something for a movie, or offer to pay the tip at dinner, I'm ending it with her. If this is a you pay for me I give you sex thing I'm done with it. I think my strategy will be, when we go see a movie, to simply suggest she pay for the tix. I'll know my answer immediately.

Reminds me of this chick I'd dated twice who is a customer at my part time. (Meet up for drinks.) Now I didn't mind paying for the drinks as I suggested the meet but the chick didn't even offer to pay or at least leave a tip. (Just shows the type who wouldn't have your back in the least if something were to ever happen.)

Hilarious thing is I found out on the second date she used to work in a strip club as a waitress. Made complete sense. Chick had the stripper mentality of "get money". She'd attempt to use her "assets" like I was some kind of chump who would just keep asking her out to be "seen" with her and drool over her "charms" though I know full well the nonsense. She'd also always talk about vacations, how her family likes expensive things yada yada. (Those who talk about it aren't REALLY about it.)

Chick was straight up trying to test me the second time we met up telling me some dude (she works in NYC for a corporation for a while now) bought her a $700 dollar purse and just gave it to her because he likes her....but she doesn't like him.

I'm sitting there listening to her nonsense as if I was clueless to what she thought she was pulling and told her..Well why don't you give it back? She had no answer.

Chick was most likely waiting to see if "I liked her more" and said: "OH I'll buy you a $1000 dollar purse! And one up him!" LMAO Righto!

Or she gave it up to him to get that purse she "didn't want".

Wound up not bothering with her after the second meet...She came up to me a few months ago after when she saw me at my part time and started making small talk and trying to run the "look at me I'm sexy game" to which I acted non-chalantly and just talked...At the end she asked if I still had her number and then said "Well I guess I'll see you around"..Yep. lol.

Perhaps I'll meet up with her if I feel like it just for a fvck and chuck. Otherwise I'll pass. Some of these chicks are hilarious!

 

[corrector]

When I go out on a date with a woman then I'll always use a credit card. That way, once you break-up with her, you'll have all of those credit card statements as a memoribilia of the times you've had with her.

Dating is about creating memories. When you start worrying about stuff like paying, it creates a negative vibe and just spoils the good-times. There is always a positive spin to everything.

 

[Zarky]

Hahahaha.... I LOVE Burroughs..... I hate to admit it. But I do.

I don't, I think he's a clown whose fear and loathing of women will cause perpetual celibacy for himself.

Anyway, OP, the fault is with nobody but yourself. As other people said you didn't set the frame early enough.

 

[Boilermaker]

I think women are allowed to not pay 1/2 the time.

If we criticize them for defending feminist rights and we are wanting them to be feminine and submissive, and affectionate; we have to give them to right to demand to be taken care of by their men financially.

I'd say, paying ratio should be proportional to income ratio. Ideally, man makes more money, hence should pay more, in a traditional sense.

 

[Boilermaker]

I agree with Zarky.

Anybody who sees the world through a paranoid-delusional perspective will be bitter, strict and inflexible.

I am not saying there's not bits of truth in what he says usually.

He always seeks for evidence that re-affirms his outlandish theories, though.

Oklahoma City Bomber was out on a crusade, so was Breivik from Norway.

I wouldn't be surprised to see Burroughs in the news after having stormed a few Yoga classes with an AK-47.

After all, he will frag a few manginas and femcvnts even if he doesn't exclusively get women.

:crackup:

 

[Burroughs]

Awww Zarky warky's mad..all his 'expert' negotiation and he's still living on welfare

:crackup:

Boilermaker don't be upset because you're on the 15 year PHD plan

 

[Boilermaker]

Hahaha, I know right!



Dude's funny though, you gotta give him that.

 

[Zarky]

I wouldn't be surprised to see Burroughs in the news after having stormed a few Yoga classes with an AK-47.

The sad part is that this is entirely and realistically possible these days. Anyway I'm over it, the guy's on my ignore list. He doesn't bother me personally, I just hope no young guy actually listens to him. THAT would bother me because it would really short-circuit a young mind.

Hate breeds. Any time I see hate on these boards (or any other), I have a desire to stamp it out.

And even worse is that women can smell hate a mile away and it's instant dry-p*ssy.

 

[yuppaz]

Op - ya that sucks she doesn't even try to pay for anything ever. I wouldn't stick around for long with one like that. She should at least offer occasionally...

 

[glass half full]

After reading this, and my as-of-late new found freedom from biyatch land I realize it makes total sense for all dates to be "dutch". After all, a date is an audition for a relationship. It's tough out there for everybody financially and these are modern times ie, gals are just as high and mighty as men. Therefore, they should always pay half IMO. No excuses. This should(nicely of course) be implied in the beginning of a dating relationship, and should separate the good and bad prospects.

 

[DonJuanabe]

She isn't high maintenance, and sure 30-40 bucks for dinner or 50 for movie tix and pizza isn't a huge amount of money, and I believe wholeheartedly that since I make more than she does I should pay more than she does, but a woman should pay every once in a while, or pay the tip, or get the tix while you get dinner, something. At the least it says I am contributing too.

I am merely acknowledging reality - it takes time to get to know someone and I've learned that she is selfish. That's not a quality I look for in a woman so unless she changes in the next 2-3 weeks I'm done.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

She isn't high maintenance, and sure 30-40 bucks for dinner or 50 for movie tix and pizza isn't a huge amount of money, and I believe wholeheartedly that since I make more than she does I should pay more than she does, but a woman should pay every once in a while, or pay the tip, or get the tix while you get dinner, something. At the least it says I am contributing too.

I am merely acknowledging reality - it takes time to get to know someone and I've learned that she is selfish. That's not a quality I look for in a woman so unless she changes in the next 2-3 weeks I'm done.

That's what I'm saying. I don't mind paying if I'm the one doing the asking out. But if a chick won't even offer as a gesture to pay for dessert, or at least the tip, coffee she's just looking for a provider and as soon as the well runs dry she'll find any justification to go ghost if she can't milk another dude or dudes at the same time.

You have to break that cycle. The more you give. The more you invest. The more she'll take....while giving it up to someone else.

 

[mrRuckus]

Why do you need a test? The evidence is already staring you in the face.

 

[mrRuckus]

I think women are allowed to not pay 1/2 the time.

If we criticize them for defending feminist rights and we are wanting them to be feminine and submissive, and affectionate; we have to give them to right to demand to be taken care of by their men financially.

Why are these things linked as if they come in groups where you either get all the things or none of the things?

 

[scrouds]

I had some time to think about this.

ITS NOT ABOUT MONEY.

A woman of value gives back to her man. It should be equitable. Whether that's for paying for some dates, cooking, gifts, doing things for him, there needs to be an equitable return.

Some women may be selfish and just get for themselves. Others may understand equity but overvalue the worth of access to her snatch. Both types should be avoided.

 

[SSBS]

Ok, this piqued my interest. Not to hijack the thread, but if this isn't much? Why doesn't she pay 1/2 of the time?

She has money for clothes, boots, vacations for herself. Why not pay her own way on dates, or at least offer to pay?

The AMOUNT being spent has nothjing to do with the fact SHE SPENDS NOTHING AND EXPECTS A FREE RIDE.

I'm guessing that OP paid for everything up front in the beginning to impress the lady.

She is used to him picking up the tab. Lots of cultures are like this. The man pays always, no question.

If the OP is stressing over small amounts WITHOUT EVER BRINGING THE SUBJECT UP...

I am unable to process this information. You expect a girl that you've been paying for (minimal amounts) to suddenly volunteer to pay for some dates?

Why would she?

I've been out with several women that insist on paying their own way, or at least half, and sometimes they pick up the whole check.

I don't like it, it makes me feel like I am getting friendzoned, though my bang rate is still pretty high with women that pay all or partial.

Stressing over $20 - 30 is lame. Now if you're taking her out and dropping $200 every time, that's different.

I would just say, stop going out all the time if it bothers you so much. Have a movie night, cook dinner (make sure she pays for half the groceries ), do something cheap now and then.

 

[Scaramouche]

Dear Don Juanabe,
Harvey Poon has it right,"You should of put your foot down and made things clear sooner."....Years ago I was like you,but now I spell it out after the first Date,where I pick up the tab,after that we go Dutch....Now of course I am talking about Woman earning reasonable money....Someone on welfare is a different situation,I always stump up then.

 

[yuppaz]

Ya it's really more about the gesture & a show of character (want the girl to be a giver too) then the money. If I knew a girl didn't have a lot of money but still made me dinner once in a while or something that would be just as valuable and a sign of good character.

 

[vatoloco]

...and I believe wholeheartedly that since I make more than she does I should pay more than she does, but a woman should pay every once in a while, or pay the tip, or get the tix while you get dinner, something. At the least it says I am contributing too.

Okay, if that's how you feel then you're with an incompatible woman. What are you gonna do?

I am merely acknowledging reality - it takes time to get to know someone and I've learned that she is selfish. That's not a quality I look for in a woman so unless she changes in the next 2-3 weeks I'm done.

Personally, I don't think she will...