Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
It's a bit easier to embrace them if you understand them first.The Juan and only said:The funny thing is, the very tone of your posts suggest you, like everyone, have emotions they must learn to embrace...
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
It's a bit easier to embrace them if you understand them first.The Juan and only said:The funny thing is, the very tone of your posts suggest you, like everyone, have emotions they must learn to embrace...
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Women would need to be more methodical in the pursuits and men would need to be more emotional in theirs.Obsidian said:Wow, this post is a sad mix of truth and untruth, which is a dangerous combination. If a woman flakes on you, yes you should NEXT her. But men and women are not the same, not by any stretch of the imagination.
i never said it wasn't. I'm not arguing against learning to control emotions, or understand the world.Francisco d'Anconia said:It's a bit easier to embrace them if you understand them first.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Having emotions does not make you weak, it makes you human. Not being able to control your emotions makes you weak.NickBe said:You are weak, your emotions make you weak. .
People seldom believe what they don't understand.The Juan and only said:...I'm saying that it's ridiculous to say you "don't have any" ....
Obsidian said:Wow, this post is a sad mix of truth and untruth, which is a dangerous combination. If a woman flakes on you, yes you should NEXT her. But men and women are not the same, not by any stretch of the imagination.
Still not on board yet. Do men like to be "put in their place" so to speak by a woman? No. Do women like to be "put in their place" (not in a jerk way, but in a direct, "get your act together" way)? Yes.violator said:I never said that we were not different. I meant that we are not THAT different as some people would have us believe with regard to matters pertaining to sexual attraction.
I agree and appreciate much what you are saying, but my point is how many unreturned phone calls or broken dates must a guy endure before he realizes that the girl in question is not testing him nor playing hard to get, but is actually not interested in him?reset said:Still not on board yet. Do men like to be "put in their place" so to speak by a woman? No. Do women like to be "put in their place" (not in a jerk way, but in a direct, "get your act together" way)? Yes.
So much of these interactions seem to be women testing the guy, to see how much he'll put up with, the real man doesn't put up with very much. When the woman sees this she yields, but at the beginning, there are going to be little scenarios she sets up with the deliberate intention of seeing if you'll cave. Not a good or bad thing, just the way it is.
I don't know how many men go out of their way to test girls... again guys just like to go with the flow and have a good time. Much of this board helps the guy do what it is necessary to get to the point that he can do this with women, but he has to be wary of the fun little pitfalls she'll set up for him... which is something guys don't do (unless they are drama queens I suppose).
You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.
She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.
Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.
Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.
Excellent!Mr.Positive said:Having emotions does not make you weak, it makes you human. Not being able to control your emotions makes you weak.
Good point. Very true.The Juan and only said:i never said it wasn't. I'm not arguing against learning to control emotions, or understand the world.
I'm saying that it's ridiculous to say you "don't have any" -- and represents a serious mental disorder infact.
edit: I think I misunderstood what you were saying. even so, post stands.
Well we agree there. I suppose I saw it as "one broken date, one unreturned call" automatically means non-interest. (It DOES mean games, but that's normal).violator said:I agree and appreciate much what you are saying, but my point is how many unreturned phone calls or broken dates must a guy endure before he realizes that the girl in question is not testing him nor playing hard to get, but is actually not interested in him?
That is the point of my post. Too many guys here are deluded with this she is testing me or is making me go through hoops. Yes, women test to a certain degree and play games I suppose as a defense mechanism, but only to a point. An interested female will know at what point she needs to stop before she loses the guy and if she is really interested she will not test or play hard to get at all because her emotions will eventually trump her logic.
Having no emotions does not make more human. It actually makes less human. What makes you more human is using your emotions to their best effect. Robert greene discussed this in his war book. We have to except that humans are part animal. What separates humans from animals is that we can be RATIONAL.Mr.Positive said:Having emotions does not make you weak, it makes you human. Not being able to control your emotions makes you weak.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
You sound like some sort of robot. Don't tell me, did you read a book that explained to you, step-by-step, how to be a "real man"?As for men and women being the same, thats not right. Women are emotional creatures. Me I am not emotional, I feel no connection after sex, I do not want to hug or share myself after sex. I just want to give her $50 cab fare and kick her out. I am sure some men do want to hug but not as much as females because they are emotional beings and men are logical.
You are right there, I have a sociopathic personality. I disagree that it is a mental disorder, these days everything is a mental disorder. If anybody is the slightest bit different they are classed as mentally unhealthy. It is just how humans deal with people that are different. I do not deny there are some genuine mental disorders that people suffer from but a person that lacks the ability to feel being called a sociopath is a bit over the top. So what if I have no emotions in a lot of ways I am better off than others.The Juan and only said:i never said it wasn't. I'm not arguing against learning to control emotions, or understand the world.
I'm saying that it's ridiculous to say you "don't have any" -- and represents a serious mental disorder infact.
edit: I think I misunderstood what you were saying. even so, post stands.
What have I got that you don't? I am not ruled by emotion. I can adapt to my situation and be whoever I want to be. You are bound by emotions, I have freedom.actually, i want to know something. what do you think you've got that i don't? i ask, what is the point of living if not for happiness?
don't dodge the question, please.
I did not read any book, I was not involved in the seduction community for the past 6 year. I have what would clinically be called a sociopathic personality. I hate lables though, sociopaths are described as sexual deviants who even sexual abuse children. I don't sexually abuse children, in fact if I ever met somebody who did I would disembowel them without hesitation.Roulette said:You sound like some sort of robot. Don't tell me, did you read a book that explained to you, step-by-step, how to be a "real man"?
You're missing out on the best part my friend.
We are the BORG, you will be assimilated. Resistance is futile!
That was a funny. I command you to laugh!
Just joshing with ya mate
Kudos,
Matt
NickBe said:What have I got that you don't? I am not ruled by emotion. I can adapt to my situation and be whoever I want to be. You are bound by emotions, I have freedom.
what's the point of having freedom if it doesn't make you happy?
I stay calm in an emergency, people with emotion almost never do. I do not experience all the bad emotions which honestly these day it seems like there is more of. That means no depression, no real grieving, no living in denial. I am not a slave to my emotions.
well you're changing your tune. So now you do have some emotions? just good ones, and you've learnt to control the bad ones (depression)? like i've been saying I support all along, you mean?
I made a lot of money in the past few years and I attribute it all to having no emotion. I was not held back by fear of success which almost everybody with emotions is.
what's the point of money if not to bring you happiness?
Basically what I am saying is I am not restricted in life in the same way you are. I fit into any social group, I can make friends with anybody and I can control people.
well you certainly have desires, don't you? most of which I would class as egomaniacal. Am I not allowed to have my own desires too, without being called weak or stupid? Also, again, what's the point of friends if they don't bring joy to your life?
So again i ask is it possible that lacking emotions is actually the next evolutionary step? I mean if I can control people with emotions maybe the lack of emotions actually makes me superior not inferior. Maybe having no real weakness to speak of makes me better off than people with emotions.
As for happiness I told you I experience it but I doubt in the same way you do. When I c*m I feel content, I enjoy a good glass of wine.
oh right? so you do have emotions? just different ones to me [blind, baseless statement]; or do you in fact not, as you stated so adamantly in a previous post? I'm confused.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.