"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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win-over the LJBF situation? how?

S

sad samurai

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so this girl i hung out with for couple of weeks did this to me when i started to push a little bit forward. shes kinda gets her "best friend" into the scene like "hey u know there is a great girl in my firm that we should all get together to have a drink sometimes" - worse thing is although she put that in a vague way but she asks my sister directly "what type of girl i like? maybe she can keep an eye on it for me" ...

hell, this is very much a LJBF i believe. what i need for the gurus is that:

1. am i wrong and over reacting? maybe she tends to push me away to "test my limit"

2. so lets say it is 100% LJBF, and how do i win-over it...

can someone say something?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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S

sav

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you win HER over by not being available ....

but, this can prove fairly difficult... what i would do in ur case is use her for her friends.. ;)
 
T

tn2005

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what I would do to is to take her out of her comfort zone, if she really things that you are just a friend she probably wont have a problem going to a "cool club/bar/ some other cool attraction" with you. Isolate her by inviting her and her alone, then once the two of you are together in this place don't be available to her romantically, hit on other women and pay her less attention. Believe it or not this will drive her your way.
 
Z

zack77766

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sav said:
you win HER over by not being available ....

but, this can prove fairly difficult... what i would do in ur case is use her for her friends.. ;)
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Good idea. Exes remain exes.
 
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