She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
Yeah, the 40 year old is damaged goods, no argument here, but it's more physical (possibly beat up *****, 2 kids running around) whereas the stripper is emotionally/mentally damaged goods. To me, mental pain is worse than physical pain. I doubt the 40 year old would play mind games to the level the stripper would. Strippers are no good for your mental health.bigneil said:I seem to be losing the debate.
But MisterD I didn't say wholesome I said MORE wholesome.
No 40 year old divorced mother of 2 is wholesome either.
Everyone has there vices.MM92 said:What is your obsession with strippers?
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
:crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup:TonyBaloney said:I now add myself to the choir of voices that think Neil has psych problems.
The whole thread of late about breaking NC with the stripper was just nuts, now you have absolutely confirmed in my mind that your suffering in the mind. Poor you. I would suggest a visit to a good shrink, Neil! This is one hell of a big hole your in, aint it?
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Exactly! I always knew the stripper was a stripper and (let's face it) sells sex for a living.Mike32ct said:We dont really know the whole story. Did the 40 yo ride the carusel for many years? Did she cheat and then divorce and take some guy to the cleaners? Or was he really an a$shole, and she rightly divorced him?
:nervous: :nervous: :nervous: :nervous: :nervous:bigneil said:Exactly! I always knew the stripper was a stripper and (let's face it) sells sex for a living.
What did the non-strippers have for issues?
1) HB7, 47, Had 2 kids (smoking hot 18-19 year olds), secretly about to go bankrupt in her business and lose her Visa.
2) HB8, 36, Not sure if she could get pregnant, then got pregnant within months of our breakup.
3) HB8, 38, Had 1 kid, Told me she had Herpes right when we were about to have sex.
4) HB7, 42, Had 2 kids, had just divorced Microsoft Millionaire, and was ruthless toward him in front of me.
5) HB9, 40, Had 1 year old twins but had just been divorced and worked for Big Pharma.
6) HB7, 29, Had rage issues and would storm off at the bat of an eye and worked for Military Industrial Complex.
7) HB8, 25, Was an alcoholic and unemployed.
None of them were strippers. I like the stripper better than most of them.
It is man, we're both 23, none of us wants a clapped out 40 year old with a vagina as loose as KFC bucket and we don't want a 20 year old stripper who is clearly deranged and was probably abused as a child.San Jose California said:^Yeah for real. I'm not even gonna vote that's such a dumb poll.
LolSolomon said:keep trying to justify to yourself that just because your dating a "hot stripper" that she is quality because of hot she is or "wholesome" because she has no std's yet she is sliding up and down a pole smutting herself for dollars
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.