She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
so does this mean that once a guy gets a gf, it is in other words, retiring from his social circle of friends, and creating a new life with the gf?Francisco d'Anconia said:Your best bet is to live your own life and not integrate it into his.
why would that matter?Francisco d'Anconia said:It depends whether the guy is an AFC or a DJ.
rocco said:why would that matter?
Francisco d'Anconia said:... is he going to integrate himself into her life or integrate hers into his?
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
That's AFC.rocco said:so does this mean that once a guy gets a gf, it is in other words, retiring from his social circle of friends, and creating a new life with the gf?
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Francisco d'Anconia said:It depends whether the guy is an AFC or a DJ. In other words, is he going to integrate himself into her life or integrate hers into his. Your best bet is to live your own life and not integrate it into his.
That's how I live my life. It took me 17 years but it makes o much more sense. Friends are great but I never depend on them to the point where it would make me depressed.my strength is independent of anyone else in this world - so i just move on and keep moving forward whether im surrounding with friends or have none at any given time.
You understand. Now get this, if these guys get married and have kids it will probably happen to them. Women who tend to be the focus in a relationship make their children the focus of the family. That's why there's a lot of married men who feel that their dog get more affection than they do because their wife focuses all their efforts on the kids. THEN guess who the husbands end up calling to ask to hang out with "for old times sake."killbill said:I agree man. unfortunalley (sp) my two best friends were AFC they were my best friends for probably 12 years. then they got g/f and they were to cool to hang out with me. so after awhile it got so dumb I stopped talking to them.
*Francisco d'Anconia said:You understand. Now get this, if these guys get married and have kids it will probably happen to them. Women who tend to be the focus in a relationship make their children the focus of the family. That's why there's a lot of married men who feel that their dog get more affection than they do because their wife focuses all their efforts on the kids. THEN guess who the husbands end up calling to ask to hang out with "for old times sake."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.