"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
when your friends get a gf
- Thread starter rocco
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
rocco said:
Francisco d'Anconia said:
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
That's AFC.rocco said:
for teenagers yes - when a guy gets a gf he tends to drink from the fountain every moment of every day that he can and neglect everythign else in his life.
as an adult, it shouldn't affect the relationship between two guy friends. most adult women are fine with their guy having guy friends that they go play golf with or whatever.
as for coping with the change, thats pretty easy.
you should never ever depend on the people around you such that if they just picked up and left you'd be dire straights (whether that be emotionally, financially or whatever).
i've had friends come and go over the years. and while it may be disappionting to see them go - i don't see them as being a part of my own strength. my strength is independent of anyone else in this world - so i just move on and keep moving forward whether im surrounding with friends or have none at any given time.
Short Story: My workout partner and I started working out together in September and shortly after that around November his gf and him broke up. He started coming to the gym more regularly, calling me all the time to hang out and do stuff and we pretty much were kicking it outside of the gym 3-4 days a week. I was dating girls but had no gf and had no intentions of getting into a LTR.
In about 3-4 months he started getting into much better shape at the gym and we went out to the clubs and some girls were hitting/approaching him. He didnt get any numbers though and did not make any approaches at all. He did however completely swear off having a GF and said he planned on meeting and hooking up with some new hors. Well his ex and him met at a party a few weeks into the new year and she noticed he was in better shape. (By the way, now is the time to mention that she broke up with him so she could fvck another guy). Back to the story. So she notices he's in better shape and tells him that and says she wants to get back with him. Two weeks later they are officially back together... but there's more...
He slowly stops coming to the gym as often. First its a missed day here and there to hang out with her. Then he's gone all weekend with her. Then its bike rides with her every day INSTEAD of the gym. And now he hasn't been to the gym in about a month. Calls me and says he'll be there but never shows and always i'm being given an excuse as to why. True story.
my buddy got a GF. We used to chill and hang like 3-4 days a week, sometimes even more probably. We haven't chilled in 3 months. Well I started going out more and meeting new people so I guess it worked to both of our advantages. Kinda his loss too... our friendship grew apart a bit recently
theunflushables
Master Don Juan
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"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
Francisco d'Anconia said:
I agree man. unfortunalley (sp) my two best friends were AFC they were my best friends for probably 12 years. then they got g/f and they were to cool to hang out with me. so after awhile it got so dumb I stopped talking to them.
Francisco d'Anconia
Master Don Juan
You understand. Now get this, if these guys get married and have kids it will probably happen to them. Women who tend to be the focus in a relationship make their children the focus of the family. That's why there's a lot of married men who feel that their dog get more affection than they do because their wife focuses all their efforts on the kids. THEN guess who the husbands end up calling to ask to hang out with "for old times sake."killbill said:
Kev07
Master Don Juan
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obviously, your friends will need to make time for their girls, but if they are AFCs, they will get sucked in and spend almost all of their time with the girls.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Hitman10000
Master Don Juan
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Many inexperienced or misinformed guys do this too. I knew someone who went psycho after a girl dumped him. There was a reason why he went psycho: He spent every night on the phone with her for 2-3 hours talking and talking. He grew close and addicted to her mindless chatter and when he was weened off..he cried. Instead of hanging out with his boys or seeking out buddies he always looked forward into hearing her voice or seeing her.