jglide123
Don Juan
Had this discussion with a few friends earlier. At what age should a man stop going to clubs? Interested in you guys' opinions....
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
I thought that also - but I got my second wind at 37! With the right diet and exercise, aging is not a consistent fall-off, it's more like a sine curve. Since age 40 I've had 6 of my best girlfriends, and I'm only 41.5.Mike32ct said:At 28, I was hitting the clubs twice per week. At 36, I'm pretty much at the end of my clubbing days.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Good point. I'm currently working on my "second wind." I'm working out and improving my diet. I'm also gonna buzz and then soon shave my head. I'm handsome from the front, but the bald spot in the back has grown enough in size where it's hurting my game.bigneil said:I thought that also - but I got my second wind at 37! With the right diet and exercise, aging is not a consistent fall-off, it's more like a sine curve. Since age 40 I've had 6 of my best girlfriends, and I'm only 41.5.
Fair point. I mostly went to casino nightclubs which have a wider age range. Your typical downtown hip hop club will run much younger age-wise.gimmeyofonenumba said:I'm 25 and I'm already tired of clubs. I dunno why people brag about girls grinding on them. I really used to enjoy it but not so much. Its Not much of an accomplishment. I've seen girls grind with complete rejects. Anyways..to answer the question I'd say 29-30 for night clubs. I understand alota people may be building their social confidence late so alot of people on this forum will have a different view as to what society thinks.But past 30 you will certainly stand out at a night club. Not necessarily a bad thing. I've seen some of theese guys keep social value, but it does have a negative stigma. Depends on the type of club as well. If it's the typical hip hop night club then 29 is def. Too old. If its a more classier eclectic lounge type of club then perhaps early 30's.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.