"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
When she pops "Are you a virgin?"
- Thread starter bigbag
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
Most certenaly it will make the whole act more pure, and she will make an effort to put you confortable.
My first GF knew she was my first. And my second knew she was my second. Both before sex.
Also, why should your first time be part lie?
Good luck with her.
How does one go about even answering the question without sounding like:
a.) an ultra conservative
b.) a guy who can't get laid
c.) a horndog with lots of careless sexual encounters
As to admitting the truth... Sometimes the truth leads to ruin.
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Brilliant.Charm said:
I just thought of one...
Her: So, are you a virgin?
Me: No, I lost my virginity to Jill in grade school.
Her: Um... Ok.
Me: You know, Jill! (hold up left hand, and show her how each of the fingers outline the letters J-I-L-L)
It's corny, but it might bring a laugh.
Shiftkey
Master Don Juan
Fortunately I did pretty good my first time too so she wasn't suspicious.
manbearpig
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reyalp
Master Don Juan
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
manbearpig
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True Realness
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bigbag said:
If she asks, you should go ahead and tell her your a virgin. Alot of girls will find this flattering and might feel compelled to teach you some things. Also, if you lead her to believe that you've had sex before, she's going to expect you to perform like it (not many guys; if any, can pull off a superman type performance on their first time). I would just tell her up front so that she knows and would be more understanding to a possible early ejaculation while looking forward to your second erection.
Microphone Fiend
Master Don Juan
I love Hyori Lee
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People don't look down on you if you are a virgin.
But people can look down on you if you are a virgin.
They'll think to themselves, "What's up with this guy? Why is he not getting any? He probably has something that's not making him attractive?"
When I was a virgin, I would just lie and tell them I wasn't.
And I left it at that. They don't tell you, but a man who isn't a virgin is more attractive than a virgin.
Now, I'm not a virgin. So I don't have to lie about it anymore.
Just put it this way.
If you tell them that you are a virgin, they are going to ask you a lot of questions and it will get annoying. And it's embarassing when everyone knows that you are a virgin.
If you tell them that you are not a virgin, the conversation ends there. And nobody bothers you.
Lie until it becomes the truth.
OfficeSpace
Master Don Juan
Why lie about being a virgin? Why not be proud of it? If you don't act like it makes you undesirable, and act like you're proud of it, people will respect you for it.
It is the MTV/pop culture that tries to sell the lie to everyone that being a virgin means you're unable to get some. Stop being brainwashed by the pop culture. It's rediculous.
Don't be pressured into losing your virginity just because a lot of people say they aren't virgins. I could care less if all my friends were no longer virgins and I was the only virgin in the group. I am willing to wait until I find the right person to be my first.
"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
if the girl asks whether you're a virgin or not, if you're not, you're not! why would you even lie about it? It'll only make you feel stupid, and when she finds out that you really are, it only makes you feel stupider.
a great way would be the C&F way. if she brings it up, just turn it into something wacky, funny, and not as serious of a topic.
Canadiandon
Don Juan
OfficeSpace
Master Don Juan
haha that's awesome man! Yeah, why lie about being a virgin.Canadiandon said:
Bad Advice!! What sort of experience do you have that this works well for guys? It might have worked well with the girl you were with (given you are not a virgin which you very well may be) but it isn't great advice for every situation.True Realness said:
There's no reason you should ever have to tell her. You might tell her you'd love for her to teach you a thing or two, but whether or not you are virgin is none of her business.
Canadiandon
Don Juan
NeonBase said:
Yeah it is but you gotta say it in a certain way like how David Duchovny (from the x-files) would say it with a little smile or something like that without it sounding wierd.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.