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When Men Waste Women's Time

Trump

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Article about men wasting women’s time.


Doesn’t this just illustrate the point that men are just utility tools for women? True or frivolous?
 

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Desdinova

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I found one major error:

If she wants to have children, time is a resource she simply has less of. A woman only has until her late 30s by most physicians’ estimates to have kids without increased risks to mother and child.
I would reduce it to age 27 for her, because that's when her biological clock starts making itself more known. So if a man starts dating her close to age 27 or beyond, he has very little time to make his decision of whether he should procreate with her or not because she's going to be pestering him for a baby in no time. If he starts dating her at age 20, he has 7 years to make that decision.
 
A

AJ84

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If a man is wasting a woman’s time it’s her fault for allowing that to happen. This is ignoring red flags, tolerating a relationship that she knows is going no where and allowing herself to be fooled by lies.

I honestly don’t think a man can play a woman (with lies or misrepresentation) for years without her knowing unless she is a complete idiot.

As a female I see it happen ( and almost fell into myself once) where women rationalize a crap relationship because they either don’t want to be alone, don’t want to be the only single girl in the group, want the status of being a couple, want a kid and marriage so badly or some other reason to keep allowing her time to be wasted.

women who end up burned like this, especially more than once are more likely to than be bitter but it’s their behaviour and choices they should be bitter about:

If you’re just his plate and it’s a year and you want more but it’s not going to happen? Next
If you want kids and he’s on the fence about that after a year of being together? Next
If he keeps saying he wants a relationship but is not ready and it’s been a year? Next
If he says he’s in love and youthe one blah blah but his actions say otherwise? Next

A year is a enough time to figure out the trajectory of the relationship, imo. If it’s not where you want it to be, don’t blame him, he has a right to choose what he wants or doesn’t want to do, it’s just not compatible with what you want so... next!
 

2Rocky

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If a man is wasting a woman’s time it’s her fault for allowing that to happen. This is ignoring red flags, tolerating a relationship that she knows is going no where and allowing herself to be fooled by lies.

I honestly don’t think a man can play a woman (with lies or misrepresentation) for years without her knowing unless she is a complete idiot.

As a female I see it happen ( and almost fell into myself once) where women rationalize a crap relationship because they either don’t want to be alone, don’t want to be the only single girl in the group, want the status of being a couple, want a kid and marriage so badly or some other reason to keep allowing her time to be wasted.

women who end up burned like this, especially more than once are more likely to than be bitter but it’s their behaviour and choices they should be bitter about:

If you’re just his plate and it’s a year and you want more but it’s not going to happen? Next
If you want kids and he’s on the fence about that after a year of being together? Next
If he keeps saying he wants a relationship but is not ready and it’s been a year? Next
If he says he’s in love and youthe one blah blah but his actions say otherwise? Next

A year is a enough time to figure out the trajectory of the relationship, imo. If it’s not where you want it to be, don’t blame him, he has a right to choose what he wants or doesn’t want to do, it’s just not compatible with what you want so... next!
AJ I'd like a females perspective on an OLDER couple, late 40's living together, both done having kids. Maybe close to being Empty Nesters.
Aside form Disney Wedding fantasy, what is the expiration date for engagement and marriage in that situation?
 
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A

AJ84

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AJ I'd like a females perspective on an OLDER couple, late 40's living together, both done having kids. Maybe close to being Empty Nesters.
Aside form Disney Wedding fantasy, what is the expiration date for engagement and marriage in that situation?
It depends on if one of them wants that. Not everyone gets married just to have kids and in fact older couples with grown or no children get married all the time.
If a couple is on the same page and wants the same things from the relationship, then it’s not a waste of time. There are lots of couples who are perfectly fine with never getting married or even never living together.

However, when one wants more than the other is willing to give then it’s a waste of time.
In your example, if she wants to get married (I’m assuming it will be her not him wanting that lol) then yeah I think anything more than a year from when she wanted that is a waste of her time if it’s going to be an issue for her. And if she really wants it, it will be an issue and it will be a headache for him.

This is my opinion of course, I can’t speak for all women so for some they may feel three years waiting around is fine.
I think for fertile women who want kids and marriage they can’t afford to waste much time and ideally she would be looking for a potential husband in her early 20s.
 

RickTheToad

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It depends on if one of them wants that. Not everyone gets married just to have kids and in fact older couples with grown or no children get married all the time.
If a couple is on the same page and wants the same things from the relationship, then it’s not a waste of time. There are lots of couples who are perfectly fine with never getting married or even never living together.

However, when one wants more than the other is willing to give then it’s a waste of time.
In your example, if she wants to get married (I’m assuming it will be her not him wanting that lol) then yeah I think anything more than a year from when she wanted that is a waste of her time if it’s going to be an issue for her. And if she really wants it, it will be an issue and it will be a headache for him.

This is my opinion of course, I can’t speak for all women so for some they may feel three years waiting around is fine.
I think for fertile women who want kids and marriage they can’t afford to waste much time and ideally she would be looking for a potential husband in her early 20s.
Define a waste of time. Are each building something and doing things together? Are they both open to kids some day? If both are on the same page, I do not see an issue. I think, nowadays, if one of them (dude or dudette) have a lot of assets, they'd be crazy to get married. It's just too risky in the states. You'd be surprised how many dudes have told me their wives had changed pretty quickly after marriage. Some were able to get out of it okay, some are still suffering through their own living hell. I know a couple of them who are through it and in new relationships, but are actually terrified of the marriage contract. Prob. more so of the divorce attys.

Not sure how it is up north, but in the Northeast US, divorce is a very lucative business for the lawyers. One dude, after a year of marriage offered his wife 5k, plus moving expenses, all wedding gifts and health insurance for the rest of the year instead of a divorce. She declined and they went through the divorce machine. They each spent around 15k to the attys. All he wanted was out of the contract, didn't want anything from her. She got nothing. He's terrified in marriage. Has no issues with kids or anything else, but is absolutely terrified of the divorce machine.
 

redskinsfan92

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If a man is wasting a woman’s time it’s her fault for allowing that to happen. This is ignoring red flags, tolerating a relationship that she knows is going no where and allowing herself to be fooled by lies.

I honestly don’t think a man can play a woman (with lies or misrepresentation) for years without her knowing unless she is a complete idiot.

As a female I see it happen ( and almost fell into myself once) where women rationalize a crap relationship because they either don’t want to be alone, don’t want to be the only single girl in the group, want the status of being a couple, want a kid and marriage so badly or some other reason to keep allowing her time to be wasted.

women who end up burned like this, especially more than once are more likely to than be bitter but it’s their behaviour and choices they should be bitter about:

If you’re just his plate and it’s a year and you want more but it’s not going to happen? Next
If you want kids and he’s on the fence about that after a year of being together? Next
If he keeps saying he wants a relationship but is not ready and it’s been a year? Next
If he says he’s in love and youthe one blah blah but his actions say otherwise? Next

A year is a enough time to figure out the trajectory of the relationship, imo. If it’s not where you want it to be, don’t blame him, he has a right to choose what he wants or doesn’t want to do, it’s just not compatible with what you want so... next!
It's a rejection buffer. People are afraid to enter the dating market and face rejection.
 

samspade

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If people were simply honest there would be less of this nonsense. I repeatedly told my ex gf that I did not want kids or to get married. (With her, but I wasn't THAT honest.) She clung to the idea regardless. That's not my fault.

For men it's usually a fear of loss of pu$$y.
 
A

AJ84

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Define a waste of time. Are each building something and doing things together? Are they both open to kids some day? If both are on the same page, I do not see an issue. I think, nowadays, if one of them (dude or dudette) have a lot of assets, they'd be crazy to get married. It's just too risky in the states. You'd be surprised how many dudes have told me their wives had changed pretty quickly after marriage. Some were able to get out of it okay, some are still suffering through their own living hell. I know a couple of them who are through it and in new relationships, but are actually terrified of the marriage contract. Prob. more so of the divorce attys.

Not sure how it is up north, but in the Northeast US, divorce is a very lucative business for the lawyers. One dude, after a year of marriage offered his wife 5k, plus moving expenses, all wedding gifts and health insurance for the rest of the year instead of a divorce. She declined and they went through the divorce machine. They each spent around 15k to the attys. All he wanted was out of the contract, didn't want anything from her. She got nothing. He's terrified in marriage. Has no issues with kids or anything else, but is absolutely terrified of the divorce machine.
Waste of time when one wants the relationship to go in a direction that the other person doesn’t.

Divorce law is the same in Canada and common law marriage is recognized in all provinces (unlike the US where some states like Florida don’t recognize it).

If a guy doesn’t want to get married because of the risk then he should definitely not cave to the pressure to get married, but on the same token, if a woman really wants to get married and the guy doesn’t because he is afraid of the risk, then she should not be expected to waste her time.

People have a right to search for potential mates whose relationship values and goals are as closely aligned to theirs as possible. That includes men who don’t want to get married and women who do.

Even if it doesn’t make sense to us why someone may want certain things from a relationship, it’s not our desire, it’s not our goal to ridicule or criticize, so instead of trying to bend other people to our will (almost never sustainable and a total headache to do) it’s just easier to let them find what they want and we do the same.

Relationships are not one sided. And if a guy is really afraid of losing his assets then no he should not get married because he is basically betting on the relationship failing in the future. That’s not a good mindset for him and not being married will feel a lot better for him.
And there are women who are fine with not getting married :)
 
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ShePays

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Article about men wasting women’s time.


Doesn’t this just illustrate the point that men are just utility tools for women? True or frivolous?
Not really. If you want to "play the field," do that. Don't shack up with some pretty young thing, while you build your business, and then dump her when her eggs are 3yrs shy of turning into pumpkins. It's ****ing rude. You're supposed to be a man. Part of being a man is realizing you aren't planning to make babies with the chick you've been stringing along, for convenient, regular sex, and setting her free to find a guy who does want to make babies with her. She has a shelf life, and you're the MAN -- i.e., the responsible party.

I gave my baby brother a ration of **** about this, many moons ago, because he would string these girls on, for years at a time, with them thinking he was gonna marry them, then he'd line up some new chick, and start all over again. And *I* was supposedly the "*******," because I'd see a bunch of different girls simultaneously, and then ghost them after a couple weeks or a couple months(max), but I never lied to them, or shacked up with them, and made them think I was going to marry them.

I thought it was cowardly, lazy, and disgusting, personally. I derisively called him a "serial monogamist."

So, no, I've always said this: don't monopolize a woman's fertile years, if you know you don't want to make babies with her. That's robbing her of her purpose, even if she's too stupid to realize it. It would be just as bad for a woman to stay with you until you sold your company, and then clean out your bank account, and split the country.

You wanna be a player? Then, be a player, like a real man. Don't play house, like a ***** who's afraid he'll never get laid again.
 

ShePays

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If your brother was a man, he'd have told you to piss off and mind your business.
Fvck off, pvssy. Real men don't get laid under false pretenses. Grow up. I get sick of reading sh1t on here from desperate guys who act like they stopped making pvssy in 1999, asking the moral equivalent of "the nursing home across the street is on fire. would it be ok for me to run over there and try to get some, while it's still hot?" I don't know if the internet made more psychos, or just gave them a platform. SMH
 
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ShePays

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Trying to imagine me or my brother lecturing each other self-righteously on our sexual habits like that...

Complete f.ucking joke. Zero adult boundaries.

Surprising what goes on with some.
Trying to imagine having a brother? Not likely, with 1.3 kids per household. I have several brothers. Brothers give each other sh1t. It's part of the job description....unless you're step-brothers, and didn't really grow up together, and have to navigate the minefield of fragmented family politics.
 

Who Dares Win

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This is what happens when hypergamy is on roids, women aim at someone way above them and then complain when he drops them after the ride.

Solution? Well how about dating within your leagues so you wont be seeing as an option but as a well worth partner?

Its full of everyday normal men willing to get a stable family but apparently those men are "boring" or not hot enough and are put aside for later...except that later at somepoint is behind them watching their shoulders.
 
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ShePays

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Hang on, you edited it with an unsurprising completely emotional arguement.

The internet has made snowflake gays, that's what it's made.

You can point me in the direction last time this place even had a debate, if you'd like.
Debate implies you're gonna make an intelligent argument in defense of your position. Be my guest.
 

ShePays

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Original post. You disregard that women sniff out value like a bloodhound whilst completely victimising them.
I don't disregard anything. I'm just not bitter towards women. They've always been gpod to me, even though I'm a blatant unapologetic chauvinist. When I say that I view women as children, people may laugh, but I'm not joking. They're smaller and weaker, and more susceptible to influence. They also lie, which is what children do, because they are weak. They aren't angels; they're just dependent, and some of them are more wicked than any man could dream of being, because magnanimity requires strength; while vindictiveness requires weakness.

If you're strong, but you blame someone weaker for your own choices, then you deny your own strength. You wanna talk about victimology? The manosphere is full of it.

What it comes right down to, though, is that no woman can choose to be with you without your consent. I'm gonna assume you're an adult, and that you wouldn't allow yourself to be seduced by an underage girl? Telling a woman you enjoy fvcking that she needs to go away, when she doesn't want to, is difficult, but sometimes you have to do difficult things, because the other person won't. I've done this. A lot of men have done this....said NO to sexually aggressive underage girls, and broken things off with women we liked, but not enough to continue to give them false hope for a future that would never happen. Yes, it's terrible when a woman strings a man along, too, but that fact doesn't make it okay for a man to do it to a woman who is willing to wait, because she's just more invested in the relationship. It's a pvssy move.
 

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Even having a quick read back: "don't monopolize a woman's fertile years".

What f.ucking planet are you on? lol

Do you even understand the average age of marriage across Europe now in 2019?
Explain it to me. I don't see any congruity between those two statements.
 

ShePays

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Women aren't factually getting married until 33 where I'm from, regardless of what your opinion is, yet your argument is that men should ""set them free"" for their fertility years. It's completely devoid of any kind of awareness for modern relationships whatsoever.

It's like you've been asleep and come with advice from a hundred years back.
That's not enough information. However, given the epidemic of people playing house, it isn't surprising, either. You say they don't get married until 33, but who the hell is marrying these women? I was that age when I married, but my wife was 19. Who would marry a 33 yo woman who had shacked up with, played house with, had a series of trial marriages to other men? They aren't marrying themselves. Men have no part in this?
 

RickTheToad

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A dude doesn't know if he wants or will want to marry or have a kid with a lady right away. It can take a few months or a year, it depends as many ladies put on a mask for a long time. I know a lady who had a mask on for five years and changed was she though he was locked in and had no options. He left shortly after that.. Divorced and all in her mid 30's.

Ladies have an interesting way of fvcking up their own lives and not even knowing it. They could have a real good dude, who would marry and have children with them, but she changes and he's now not sure. In stead of rolling the dice, he selects the out option no matter how much it may hurt. Dispite what @AJ84 says, the marriage contract is something that can be taken lightly. Forget about the freakin contract, dealing with those dirt bag lawyers are enough to make anyone with a decent income and some assets wary. Also, dispite what these loser feminists say, the dudes still make the majority of the money and pay the majority of the bills. I am not saying this will or could not change, but for right now, that is how it is. Dudes have much more to lose then the ladies.
 
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