Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Nah. I'm talking friends etc. plates not included.Are you asking this 9volt of us fellow DJs or is it from the perspective of a plate? In any case, I like to have different social spheres depending on the hobby I've taken up. It creates interesting and dynamic conversations because of the perspective a person has in one social sphere will be different in another sphere.
When I'm single, I have a wider net of social circles and my confidence tends to be higher because I'll be more outgoing. I still keep a core close social circle of bros from high school that I've known for almost 20 years, yet I typically only see them a few times a year because of working and going to school full time. They're all married and busy starting or have started families by now....
When I'm juggling 2-4 plates, my time in social circles gets reduced. It ramps back up when I drop plates.
I def. avoid debbie downers. If someone's too negative or talks too much crap behind my back, I remove my presence and attention.
I have my own hobbies and am happy with alone time, yet... too much isolation playing video games, binging Netflix, or studying mad hours in my room makes me desire to be around others and adventure outdoors.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
join a club or start hanging out somewhere you can make friendsStill trying to figure out how to keep friends and start a social circle,
move to the nearest city, the only thing worse than moving is living in a small townI wish that were possible but I live in a small town, and unfortunately theres nothing I can do unless I move, I'm preparing for the lone wolf life style
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Ditto. You want friends? Be a friend. Too many people are self absorbed these days then wonder how they end up isolated.I have a dozen or more "friends" and literally hundreds of aquantences.
And what if almost everyone around you is that self-absorbed person? That is literally the BEST way you can describe the average robot that goes to my university. My one friend actually said the same thing. People suck here haha....Ditto. You want friends? Be a friend. Too many people are self absorbed these days then wonder how they end up isolated.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Self absorbed may be a thing but don't forget there are plenty or introverts in this world as well. I'm more borderline but have multiple social circles. Close friends and hockey buddies of course. Out of both groups the majority is married with kids and or divorced.Ditto. You want friends? Be a friend. Too many people are self absorbed these days then wonder how they end up isolated.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.