Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
Nah. I'm talking friends etc. plates not included.Are you asking this 9volt of us fellow DJs or is it from the perspective of a plate? In any case, I like to have different social spheres depending on the hobby I've taken up. It creates interesting and dynamic conversations because of the perspective a person has in one social sphere will be different in another sphere.
When I'm single, I have a wider net of social circles and my confidence tends to be higher because I'll be more outgoing. I still keep a core close social circle of bros from high school that I've known for almost 20 years, yet I typically only see them a few times a year because of working and going to school full time. They're all married and busy starting or have started families by now....
When I'm juggling 2-4 plates, my time in social circles gets reduced. It ramps back up when I drop plates.
I def. avoid debbie downers. If someone's too negative or talks too much crap behind my back, I remove my presence and attention.
I have my own hobbies and am happy with alone time, yet... too much isolation playing video games, binging Netflix, or studying mad hours in my room makes me desire to be around others and adventure outdoors.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
join a club or start hanging out somewhere you can make friendsStill trying to figure out how to keep friends and start a social circle,
move to the nearest city, the only thing worse than moving is living in a small townI wish that were possible but I live in a small town, and unfortunately theres nothing I can do unless I move, I'm preparing for the lone wolf life style
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Ditto. You want friends? Be a friend. Too many people are self absorbed these days then wonder how they end up isolated.I have a dozen or more "friends" and literally hundreds of aquantences.
And what if almost everyone around you is that self-absorbed person? That is literally the BEST way you can describe the average robot that goes to my university. My one friend actually said the same thing. People suck here haha....Ditto. You want friends? Be a friend. Too many people are self absorbed these days then wonder how they end up isolated.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
Self absorbed may be a thing but don't forget there are plenty or introverts in this world as well. I'm more borderline but have multiple social circles. Close friends and hockey buddies of course. Out of both groups the majority is married with kids and or divorced.Ditto. You want friends? Be a friend. Too many people are self absorbed these days then wonder how they end up isolated.
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.