Whats a proper way to react to this...

[Roelrr]

I asked a lady out to brunch for Sunday, and this is her response...

I'll let you know! I have up in the air brunch plans

I understand this is low interest and she is figuring out if her current plans are going to come to fruition...

Would a correct response be " Cool, but don't worry about it, sounds like you already have plans. I'll ask someone else."

Is the best move to also go no contact? I do want to keep options open if she decides to reach out later...

 

[Mazer]

I have encountered these many times in my early days. I suggest you retract the offer, say something like “sounds like you aren’t sure, let’s do it some other time”. Do NOT contact her after you take back the offer. Disappear. It only works if you do not chase her after you retracted the offer. Based on my previous experience, they usually contact you 1-2 weeks later, have had plenty who contacted me for a booty call. Good luck.

 

[Robert28]

So she’s willing to wait on her tentative plans over making solid plans with you. Don’t respond back, if anything you could make a joke “oh nice, you made me your backup plan huh?lol”. I’d probably say nothing back. Guys overthink responses too much when honestly saying less or nothing is saying plenty.

 

[GreatHornedOwl]

This is a sh!t test. Probably a woman's favorite. You respond with "Okay, let me know." That's it. You're basically telling her you're not asking again, and if she's interested she has to get back to you.

If you retract the offer, or try to reschedule, or joke about being a backup plan, you FAILED.

 

[Roelrr]

This is a sh!t test. Probably a woman's favorite. You respond with "Okay, let me know." That's it. You're basically telling her you're not asking again, and if she's interested she has to get back to you.

If you retract the offer, or try to reschedule, or joke about being a backup plan, you FAILED.

Would this also put me in her frame since I'm pretty much waiting for her to answer? I understand no follow up on her part is either no interest or her plans came through.

Also how would one answer her responding late Friday or Saturday, agreeing to meet at that point would seem to make one thirsty?

Would a no response, then go ahead and make other plans a good move and if she accepts later in the week just say I already have other plans. Then again if I take someone else, she could still just show up, since it's a brunch/event thing.

 

[BackInTheGame78]

Just tell her "let's do it another time when you are more sure."

I did this a few weeks ago to a new woman I had never even been on a date with. I tried to make plans for Saturday with her and she said she will let me know. So I told her the exact line above early on a Friday morning. Didn't hear back from her until later that night and she asked me what I was up to...long story short she invited me over to watch a movie with her and we ended up banging...

 

[GreatHornedOwl]

Would this also put me in her frame since I'm pretty much waiting for her to answer? I understand no follow up on her part is either no interest or her plans came through.

Also how would one answer her responding late Friday or Saturday, agreeing to meet at that point would seem to make one thirsty?

Would a no response, then go ahead and make other plans a good move and if she accepts later in the week just say I already have other plans. Then again if I take someone else, she could still just show up, since it's a brunch/event thing.

Waiting for a response after you've said that shows confidence. If you try to reschedule, it comes off as desperate because you're trying to force a "yes" out of her. What's wrong with responding to her late Friday or Saturday? She already knows you want to meet up on Sunday, lol. It's not a big secret. If you respond with absolutely nothing, you are essentially expecting a woman to double text you. That ain't gonna happen. You have to give her a reason to get back to you.

Whatever you do, don't respond with "Cool, but don't worry about it, sounds like you already have plans. I'll ask someone else."

Don't EVER say that. You are IMMEDIATELY assuming, and admitting defeat. You know what her answer is going to be?

"Okay."

And that will be the end of your interaction. I promise you.

What do you honestly think her response is going to be to that? Think about it for a minute.

"I am worried about it actually, because now I'm afraid you're going to ask someone else, so I'm going to cancel my plans to see you!"

You got to have better game than that.

 

[SirBigBell]

I asked a lady out to brunch for Sunday, and this is her response...



I understand this is low interest and she is figuring out if her current plans are going to come to fruition...

Would a correct response be " Cool, but don't worry about it, sounds like you already have plans. I'll ask someone else."

Is the best move to also go no contact? I do want to keep options open if she decides to reach out later...

I wouldnt respond. She has displayed low interest in you already. She will commit to your offer if the superior alternative offers she has collapse. I aint a fringe player sitting on the bench for nobody

 

[DTim88]

Op just say ok just let me know and continue with your day or makes plans with someone else...you should never let someone waste your time nor you should wait for someone else

 

[AureliusMaximus]

Would a correct response be " Cool, but don't worry about it, sounds like you already have plans. I'll ask someone else."

You just ignore her and move on to the next. No point of using energy on it.

 

[Black Widow Void]

It happens to the best of us. My reaction method is a little different. but has paid off a few times.

Initially, you respond with "okay."
24 hours later, you text respond with ... "Hate to renege on our potential Sunday brunch, but something suddenly came up. Keep in touch."

You say/text nothing more.

If she's around your age or older, she's going to believe that she got "Marsha Brady'd" (dumped for a better option) and no matter, your rejection wasn't hostile and it keeps the door open for her to return (and actually she might).

 

[Sir FB]

It happens to the best of us. My reaction method is a little different. but has paid off a few times.

Initially, you respond with "okay."
24 hours later, you text respond with ... "Hate to renege on our potential Sunday brunch, but something suddenly came up. Keep in touch."

You say/text nothing more.

This is brilliant

 

[GreatHornedOwl]

So many impatient dudes on this forum. Those responses are so thirsty. Makes me seriously question if some of you get women.

 

[Roelrr]

It happens to the best of us. My reaction method is a little different. but has paid off a few times.

Initially, you respond with "okay."
24 hours later, you text respond with ... "Hate to renege on our potential Sunday brunch, but something suddenly came up. Keep in touch."

You say/text nothing more.

If she's around your age or older, she's going to believe that she got "Marsha Brady'd" (dumped for a better option) and no matter, your rejection wasn't hostile and it keeps the door open for her to return (and actually she might).

Doesn't seem to bad, but she is 21 yrs younger, I'm 45 and she is 24... think ok and let me know is best option and don't dwell on it. If it happens it does if it doesn't her loss.

 

[manfrombelow]

I asked a lady out to brunch for Sunday, and this is her response...

I understand this is low interest and she is figuring out if her current plans are going to come to fruition...

Would a correct response be " Cool, but don't worry about it, sounds like you already have plans. I'll ask someone else."

Is the best move to also go no contact? I do want to keep options open if she decides to reach out later...

The best response would be silence. And then after one week, you ask her out again. If she agrees, good. If she refuses the second time without proposing an alternative date, she's NEXTED.

So basically give her TWO strikes before you next her. As for this time, just silence. Don't text back at all.

 

[Alvafe]

I would take this as a no and make others plans, when and IF she call me asking about it then I shoot, oh you didn't say anything so I made other plans

 

[Roelrr]

I would take this as a no and make others plans, when and IF she call me asking about it then I shoot, oh you didn't say anything so I made other plans

So I replied to her saying ok, let me know... but I am going to make other plans and if she responds later in the week I'll do this. This should let her know in the future I'm not going to wait for her.

 

[returnofpigman]

I asked a lady out to brunch for Sunday, and this is her response...



I understand this is low interest and she is figuring out if her current plans are going to come to fruition...

Would a correct response be " Cool, but don't worry about it, sounds like you already have plans. I'll ask someone else."

Is the best move to also go no contact? I do want to keep options open if she decides to reach out later...

Delete her number and move on. No need to do anything else. Personally I would not invite a woman out to a brunch, lunch or dinner unless she was sleeping with me. Coffee or a drink on a weekday or Sunday night Is OK.

 

[returnofpigman]

So I replied to her saying ok, let me know... but I am going to make other plans and if she responds later in the week I'll do this. This should let her know in the future I'm not going to wait for her.

It doesn’t let her know you aren’t going to wait for her. Dropping off her radar with no contact does that. It implies that you are busy with other things/women which is better for you. Low level interest women deserve zero interest until they start showing more interest and get into your frame. Indifference is the greatest way to deal with low level interest women but the indifference has to be genuine.

 

[oldmanofthesea]

It happens to the best of us. My reaction method is a little different. but has paid off a few times.

Initially, you respond with "okay."
24 hours later, you text respond with ... "Hate to renege on our potential Sunday brunch, but something suddenly came up. Keep in touch."

You say/text nothing more.

If she's around your age or older, she's going to believe that she got "Marsha Brady'd" (dumped for a better option) and no matter, your rejection wasn't hostile and it keeps the door open for her to return (and actually she might).

This is almost exactly what I do, but with one slight change. I say, "Ok sounds good." Don't say "let me know" because it sounds like you are really eager. Once I say that, I consider the date 100% OFF and then I make other plans, even if the other plans are to hang out alone or with friends (assuming I can't line up a brunch date with another girl of course). If she DOES contact me and says she will take me up on the offer, my response is always, "Hey good hearing from you. I ended up making other plans but we should get together another time soon." And I don't make any specific offer. If SHE makes the offer, I'll accept. The covert communication here (which women respond very well to) is, "I'm not going to sit around and hold my time for you while you figure out your best option. Just like you, my time is valuable and I have many options too. I'm not going to get butt-hurt about it because a guy like me with options has nothing to be upset about - I simply turn my attention elsewhere to the 100000 other friends, women, and things I can do and enjoy. You missed your opportunity with me - no big deal. If you're truly interested in hanging out, and if you're lucky enough for me to extend another offer to you (note that I didn't offer her another date YET so she has no idea if it's coming), you had better clear your schedule for me as I am clearing mine for you."

Women do so much better with covert communication.

The concept of taking the offer off the table is valid. I've used it in the past with good success and it does a good job of conveying that you are not some beggar with your hand out sitting and waiting and hoping she decides to grace you with her presence as a plan-B. But the way I do it now accomplishes the same thing in a way that I like better. Honestly either method works fine and each method can work better than the other depending on the girl, the circumstances, and her level of interest.