"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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What to say to girl who asks you if shes fat?

Bonez

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I was in a ****ty mood so I said "only if you want me to" and I got slapped.

When a girl asks you if shes fat, or if another girl is hotter than her what should you say?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Francisco d'Anconia

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Depends on the woman and your relationship with her. Some replies could be:
  • "If I had an opinion about that, it shouldn't matter."
  • "I don't know, what do you think?"
  • "I'm no good at that stuff, you shouldn't ask me."
  • "Why are you asking?"
The fact is that women ask this whenever they are feeling insecure and they want acceptance. It could be beneficial for you to answer affirmatively if you're sarging her but don't be surprised what will happen if she's genuinely insecure.
 

backbreaker

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********.. a woman isn't actually asking if she is fat. she knows she is fat. What she is asking is, is she still attractive enough to fvck. By you saying No, she assumes she is.

"I'm glad you bought up the 300 pound elephant in the room, but yeah babe... you need to put the donuts down"
 

Bonez

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Woo! Myriad by Python felt my thread was good enough for his first post, oh yeah, I'm good!

Thanks backbreaker, I knew she was fat and I didn't feel like playing along since I was working. I still felt shy when she slapped me, but I know her family, and her little bro is my little bros pal. Maybe next time I should just tell her yes? She's not ****able to me.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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COD

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YES......back in the day women would test men by saying Do these jeans make my ass look big.........the answer is yes. The truth hurts but it puts you in the drivers seat.

VERBAL AKIDO SOLUTIONS:

1) OH I THOUGHT U MEANT PHAT (pretty, hot and tempting)

2) JUST MORE OF YOU TO ADORE BABY

3) YOU'RE NOT FAT, YOU JUST GOT CURVES

4) WELL YOU'RE NOT ROSIE FAT, i mean Goodyear is not written anywhere on your body.

5) UMMM YOU JUST NEED SOME TONING UP A BIT

6) NO .........BUT THEN AGAIN I AM NOT WEARING MY CONTACTS

7) WELL LOOK AT IT THIS WAY, NICOLE RICHIE THINKS SHE IS FAT SOMETIMES, TO THE REST OF THE WORLD SHE IS A STICK.

8) NO OF COURSE YOU ARE NOT FAT....ITS THE REST OF THE PLANET THATS SLIM.


OR YOU COULD DO THE OLD SHOVE A TWIX CANDY BAR IN YOUR MOUTH
 

just so suave

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i read this c+f line in some other thread. when she asks if shes fat:

'no but your getting there' :p i cant wait to use that one ;)
 

ChrizZ

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"Am I fat honey?"

- "How would I know? I never look at you..."

- "Yeah, but I like big girls"
 

Miss

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...

Just say "I looooooooove your body" --->like you mean it. That should shut her up.

And I'm sorry, but if a girl is asking is she's fat, then she's immature and...fat.
 

Bonhomme

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Soo-oo-oo-eeeyyyy!!!!!

... or just playfully poke her tummy with your finger.

Just kidding. Depends upon circumstances.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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tmpgstx

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Tell her she's not fat, just pleasently plump *rolls eyes*
 
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backbreaker said:
*"I'm glad you bought up the 300 pound elephant in the room, but yeah babe... you need to put the donuts down"
Haha BB, you inadvertently made a slight and a joke.

The saying goes.. "No one noticed the 700 pound gorilla in the room!!"

A 300 pound elephant is a very small one.
 

lebRambo

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hahaha....a 300 pound elephant would be the coolest pet EVER!

On to the topic, I think its been pretty well covered :)
 

STR8UP

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A female friend of mine (single mom( asked me if I thought she had a lot of baggage. "Tell me the truth...don't worry, I won't be mad?" she said.

I told her "I don't answer questions like that". She kept hounding me but I stuck to my guns and she eventually dropped it.

Don't be afraid to call a woman out on this kind of sh!t. It's rude to put you on the spot with a stupid ass question like that.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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flnazrael

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That kind of question pisses me off so much that, regardless of whether I think she's fat or not, I usually answer, "yes you are."
 
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