What percent of attraction for women is visual vs non visual?

[bigdave17]

Has there ever been a study done on this?


Would most women prefer a guy with a 9/10 personality and 6/10 looks than vice versa?

 

[steelpulse]

Before, the only time I really noticed couples is when there was a significant mismatch between the two: ugly guy/pretty girl or good-looking guy/ugly girl. This weekend, I made more of an effort to notice all couples walking by or in my vicinity over short periods of time.

What I noticed is that most couples are close in looks and that almost all couples are about average in looks or slightly on either side of average (a bit more or a bit less attractive than average). From a strictly statistical perspective, this is exactly what you'd expect and it's what I found.

In other words, most people are pretty average looking and date someone who is also pretty normal/average looking.

 

[bigdave17]

Before, the only time I really noticed couples is when there was a significant mismatch between the two: ugly guy/pretty girl or good-looking guy/ugly girl. This weekend, I made more of an effort to notice all couples walking by or in my vicinity over short periods of time.

What I noticed is that most couples are close in looks and that almost all couples are about average in looks or slightly on either side of average (a bit more or a bit less attractive than average). From a strictly statistical perspective, this is exactly what you'd expect and it's what I found.

In other words, most people are pretty average looking and date someone who is also pretty normal/average looking.

I agree

 

[bigdave17]

any more opinions on this. Very curious what you guys all think

 

[Mike32ct]

I think it’s overwhelmingly visual.

I have nothing against the “personality” angle. It’s in every guy’s best interest to develop his personality and social skills.

But if the guy doesn’t FIRST make the cut in looks, she will either end the conversation or friendzone the guy.

The funny part is a guy that is her friend (but she wouldn’t date or F) probably has a decent personality. If his personality sucked, she wouldn’t be friends with him. So if he passes the personality test but fails the attraction test, what are we left with? Looks issue.

 

[bigdave17]

I think it’s overwhelmingly visual.

I have nothing against the “personality” angle. It’s in every guy’s best interest to develop his personality and social skills.

But if the guy doesn’t FIRST make the cut in looks, she will either end the conversation or friendzone the guy.

The funny part is a guy that is her friend (but she wouldn’t date or F) probably has a decent personality. If his personality sucked, she wouldn’t be friends with him. So if he passes the personality test but fails the attraction test, what are we left with? Looks issue.

I have a coworker who is a total chad - 6'1, very good looking, NW0 with great hair

does terrible with women cause he is awkward on dates

 

[jnMissouri]

Before, the only time I really noticed couples is when there was a significant mismatch between the two: ugly guy/pretty girl or good-looking guy/ugly girl. This weekend, I made more of an effort to notice all couples walking by or in my vicinity over short periods of time.

What I noticed is that most couples are close in looks and that almost all couples are about average in looks or slightly on either side of average (a bit more or a bit less attractive than average). From a strictly statistical perspective, this is exactly what you'd expect and it's what I found.

In other words, most people are pretty average looking and date someone who is also pretty normal/average looking.

I agree with this. Women tell me I'm attractive, I catch them looking at me all the time, etc. But it's usually a challenge to date the 9's and 10's for me. I suspect that would not be the case if I had Brad Pitt style looks though. I'm not ugly but I am not perfect either. Generally I date women who are 7-10, mostly in the middle I would say.

 

[Crown]

As long as you're hotter than her, you don't have to be worried about the visual part.

 

[redskinsfan92]

Looks can be improved more easily than personality. Style, hair, dress, teeth, working outh.

 

[Spaz]

Looks can be improved more easily than personality. Style, hair, dress, teeth, working outh.

Agreed.

 

[zekko]

Looks can be improved more easily than personality. Style, hair, dress, teeth, working outh.

This is probably splitting hairs, but I've always considered "looks" to be something you can't change, your genetics and whatnot. The stuff you're talking about would be considered "appearance".

Good point though, personality is harder to change than most might think, especially once you get to a certain age. Isn't that basically what PUA gurus try to do, give you a new personality?

 

[Mike32ct]

I have a coworker who is a total chad - 6'1, very good looking, NW0 with great hair

does terrible with women cause he is awkward on dates

I see what you’re saying. He’s getting the dates, but is too nervous/awkward properly move forward.

 

[jnMissouri]

Varies wildly and very subjective

I agree with this, though I would say if you are a guy who is a 10, you can do far better than the guy who is a 6 and has a great PUA personality. I think PUA techniques can drastically help, but they'll never replace good looks.

 

[jnMissouri]

Fair enough. He’s getting dates because they like his look. His next step is to work on the awkwardness.


I see what you’re saying. He’s getting the dates, but is too nervous/awkward properly move forward.

There is also the opposite of that. I was not awkward on dates in my twenties but I did ALL the wrong things. Dinner dates, complimenting women, never showing sexual interest. It was amazing because I dated hot women, but I always got friended. After studying David D. I started having success and getting them in the sack.

Still have my weak areas, we all do, but I'm doing 100 times better than I used to and actually have sex with/date multiple women.

 

[jnMissouri]

It will give you better odds overall but with other 10/10 women it'd a moot point.

Come again?

 

[Mike32ct]

Good point though, personality is harder to change than most might think, especially once you get to a certain age. Isn't that basically what PUA gurus try to do, give you a new personality?

Correct. Plus you may not want to change your personality. We get “attached” to our personality. It’s our identity.

Like the whole introvert/extrovert thing you and I discussed in the past. I LOVE being an introvert. I wouldn’t change it for anything.

 

[Spaz]

You guys must remember that a women's smv and a man's smv are measured differently.

Whilst looks has the pulling power it doesn't equates staying power.

The vast majority of people entering this forum fails at staying power or holding power.

 

[zekko]

The vast majority of people entering this forum fails at staying power or holding power.

True enough. Of course, if you believe what they say few of them are interested in sticking around anyway.
Guys who do have an interests in having staying power, and guys that girls want to keep around, are dismissed as beta.

Yet, I've always maintained that if you are of superior value, a woman will want to keep you around. Why wouldn't she?
There is also such a thing as women wanting to keep around a guy just to use him (while banging the alpha in PUA Bro Theory), but that is just one possibility. I think most women genuinely are attracted to their long term men, at least at first, although they may grow to despise him, or stop appreciating him.

 

[Spaz]

True enough. Of course, if you believe what they say few of them are interested in sticking around anyway.
Guys who do have an interests in having staying power, and guys that girls want to keep around, are dismissed as beta.

Yet, I've always maintained that if you are of superior value, a woman will want to keep you around. Why wouldn't she?
There is also such a thing as women wanting to keep around a guy just to use him (while banging the alpha in PUA Bro Theory), but that is just one possibility. I think most women genuinely are attracted to their long term men, at least at first, although they may grow to despise him, or stop appreciating him.

This might be your beliefs or even that of the majority of men in the forum - basically how most people think.

A man will have a woman's (incl. men and children) loyalty when he inspires admiration and this in turn elicits respect from her - how I think and how it influences the way I do things.

Take a wild guess who has the staying power from the above 2 examples ?

 

[zekko]

A man will have a woman's (incl. men and children) loyalty when he inspires admiration and this in turn elicits respect from her - how I think and how it influences the way I do things.

Take a wild guess who has the staying power from the above 2 examples ?

What two examples? I only see one example.
From what I see, what you are saying backs up what I said entirely. If a man inspires admiration and respect, then the woman is going to want to keep him around for the long term.