lokariototal
Don Juan
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- Sep 16, 2009
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What is it? Caring too much of what she thinks? Why do I care? Lack of self acceptance?
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
What is the root and cause of fear if rejection?
- Thread starter lokariototal
- Start date
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
...your ego and your mind. They usually hold you back to protect your feelings from being hurt and when their hurt it makes you feel your of lesser value so you can stay away from whatever you attempted that caused rejection or failure because it doesn't want it to happen again. Society like the media and how you were raised shapes your ego. Whatever works is a confidence booster for your ego whatever doesn't is not so it hold you back. This can be bad and AFCs have to condition their ego and mind to think rejections not a big deal, relax, your still alive live the moment and go with the flow.
Dante420
Master Don Juan
Conditioning
The real reason people fear rejection
Our brains are still wired for life thousands of years ago when we lived in small tribes. Evolution has not caught up with technology and society yet. One of the consequences of this is that fear of rejection you have.
Here's why you have that fear:
Back when we lived in small tribes there weren't a whole lot of women around that were your age and primed for procreating. Some were too old, too young, sick, pregnant, whatever. so out of the 100 or so people, only half were women and most of them weren't candidates for mating.
So say you're in your tribe and you see a girl you like but you have that fear. The fear is protecting you.
For one, she might have a bf that will get 5 of his friends to club you to death if he sees you talking to his girl. Literally there is a risk of death in this situation. The fear is helping you stay alive.
Even if she is single and you approach but she shoots you down, she'll go and tell all of her friends (the rest of the girls that are single and within age range to mate with you) that you're a loser and they won't like you either. So now all of the girls in your tribe don't like you and you have no hope of passing on your genes. Epic fail.
That's why the fear of rejection exists, but as you can see, it is clearly out dated. We live in towns and cities now with thousands of people. We also have laws protecting us from harm. So the threat of be excommunicated by all the women in your area no longer exists, nor the threat of being killed by the "alpha male" for talking to his woman.
It is for these reasons that we have to push past that fear. It served us well in the past but is now obsolete.
Our brains are still wired for life thousands of years ago when we lived in small tribes. Evolution has not caught up with technology and society yet. One of the consequences of this is that fear of rejection you have.
Here's why you have that fear:
Back when we lived in small tribes there weren't a whole lot of women around that were your age and primed for procreating. Some were too old, too young, sick, pregnant, whatever. so out of the 100 or so people, only half were women and most of them weren't candidates for mating.
So say you're in your tribe and you see a girl you like but you have that fear. The fear is protecting you.
For one, she might have a bf that will get 5 of his friends to club you to death if he sees you talking to his girl. Literally there is a risk of death in this situation. The fear is helping you stay alive.
Even if she is single and you approach but she shoots you down, she'll go and tell all of her friends (the rest of the girls that are single and within age range to mate with you) that you're a loser and they won't like you either. So now all of the girls in your tribe don't like you and you have no hope of passing on your genes. Epic fail.
That's why the fear of rejection exists, but as you can see, it is clearly out dated. We live in towns and cities now with thousands of people. We also have laws protecting us from harm. So the threat of be excommunicated by all the women in your area no longer exists, nor the threat of being killed by the "alpha male" for talking to his woman.
It is for these reasons that we have to push past that fear. It served us well in the past but is now obsolete.
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
That sounds like a bunch of hooey. Everyone just wants to be liked and being told someone doesn't like you sucks.
That fear of death explanation doesn't explain why women are afraid of rejection too. And save me further completely made up possible explanations.
That fear of death explanation doesn't explain why women are afraid of rejection too. And save me further completely made up possible explanations.
LOL. Don't pretend to be a scientist.Blank said:Our brains are still wired for life thousands of years ago when we lived in small tribes. Evolution has not caught up with technology and society yet. One of the consequences of this is that fear of rejection you have.
Here's why you have that fear:
Back when we lived in small tribes there weren't a whole lot of women around that were your age and primed for procreating. Some were too old, too young, sick, pregnant, whatever. so out of the 100 or so people, only half were women and most of them weren't candidates for mating.
So say you're in your tribe and you see a girl you like but you have that fear. The fear is protecting you.
For one, she might have a bf that will get 5 of his friends to club you to death if he sees you talking to his girl. Literally there is a risk of death in this situation. The fear is helping you stay alive.
Even if she is single and you approach but she shoots you down, she'll go and tell all of her friends (the rest of the girls that are single and within age range to mate with you) that you're a loser and they won't like you either. So now all of the girls in your tribe don't like you and you have no hope of passing on your genes. Epic fail.
That's why the fear of rejection exists, but as you can see, it is clearly out dated. We live in towns and cities now with thousands of people. We also have laws protecting us from harm. So the threat of be excommunicated by all the women in your area no longer exists, nor the threat of being killed by the "alpha male" for talking to his woman.
It is for these reasons that we have to push past that fear. It served us well in the past but is now obsolete.
Kupid Diggs
Don Juan
Wow after reading all that I just have one question for you. WTF are you talking about??? :crazy: LoL...Blank said:Our brains are still wired for life thousands of years ago when we lived in small tribes. Evolution has not caught up with technology and society yet. One of the consequences of this is that fear of rejection you have.
Here's why you have that fear:
Back when we lived in small tribes there weren't a whole lot of women around that were your age and primed for procreating. Some were too old, too young, sick, pregnant, whatever. so out of the 100 or so people, only half were women and most of them weren't candidates for mating.
So say you're in your tribe and you see a girl you like but you have that fear. The fear is protecting you.
For one, she might have a bf that will get 5 of his friends to club you to death if he sees you talking to his girl. Literally there is a risk of death in this situation. The fear is helping you stay alive.
Even if she is single and you approach but she shoots you down, she'll go and tell all of her friends (the rest of the girls that are single and within age range to mate with you) that you're a loser and they won't like you either. So now all of the girls in your tribe don't like you and you have no hope of passing on your genes. Epic fail.
That's why the fear of rejection exists, but as you can see, it is clearly out dated. We live in towns and cities now with thousands of people. We also have laws protecting us from harm. So the threat of be excommunicated by all the women in your area no longer exists, nor the threat of being killed by the "alpha male" for talking to his woman.
It is for these reasons that we have to push past that fear. It served us well in the past but is now obsolete.