Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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What is my next move

DimaDrill

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I never called her after the first one until last week. The date was ok, she talked a lot about her ex boyfriends, said most of her friends are guys, told me some wild stories of her partying. We had a good conversation going most of the night, no real akward silences, but i couldn't pick up if she is interested or not. SHE DID SAY THAT that she is not looking for a relationship right now cuz she had a tough one end in the fall. That seems like a red flag to me.
 
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"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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DimaDrill

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i wish it was that easy...she seemed like all of her wild crzy partying is behind her, and she learned her lessons, so i don't think hit and quit it will work with this girl.
 

The Rake

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"she talked a lot about her ex boyfriends"......

"told me some wild stories of her partying".....

"SHE DID SAY THAT that she is not looking for a relationship right now"....

"she thanked me for the dinner (which I paid for), smiled, and left"...

"What is confusing is why she would go out with me after such a long time of not being in touch? Should I persue this or just move on to another girl?"
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Her EX-BFs gave her a thrill-a-minute and she was every which way and loose with them. You (on the other hand) are a "nice" safe guy who paid her dinner (yes, all girls love being taken to a nice restaurant), listened to her attentively like a therapist, and dropped her off with a handshake (?). Very respectful of you. Don't be surprised if she does keep in touch with you and wants you as a "friend only".
 

DeathDealer

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well I don't want to be as cynical as THE RAKE but I share some of his comments on this girl.

"talking about ex-boyfriends" = red flag number #1
, would you talk about your ex-girlfriends in front of a girl you were planning to date or dating initially?

"says most of her friends are guys" = red flag number #2, a well rounded person will either have mostly friends of the same gender or have an equal amount of genders. a person who has a huge ego will not get along with someone of the same gender.

"she is not looking for a relationship right now" = red flag #3, when a girl says that outloud it means she doesn't want anything serious with you.

she probably contacted you cause she has no one else to contact and finds you a 'nice guy' to keep her company for awhile. you got 3 strikes and you're out.

oh yeah, NEXT HER!
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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DimaDrill

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I think you guys are right, but i dunno if acting like ass would have made me more attractive to her, since it looks like she has been in a relationship with a guy who cheated on her before. Have any of you had a girl you went out with who actually answered her cell phone calls during the date and then agreed to see you again?
I think that pretty much seals the deal, if a girl is interested i would imagine she would not answere her cell while on a date with you. But may be i'm over analyzing here.
 

saki

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I would have told her you dont want to hear about her exs and if she kept doing it I would have told her that I had to go.
 

DeathDealer

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Originally posted by DimaDrill
I think you guys are right, but i dunno if acting like ass would have made me more attractive to her, since it looks like she has been in a relationship with a guy who cheated on her before. Have any of you had a girl you went out with who actually answered her cell phone calls during the date and then agreed to see you again?
I think that pretty much seals the deal, if a girl is interested i would imagine she would not answere her cell while on a date with you. But may be i'm over analyzing here.
uh, why wouldn't she answer her cell? if it's important or pertains to the event at hand i don't care. however if she's on a social call - she better cut that sh1t out within a minute.
 

DimaDrill

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I just think taking calls during a date is like talking on the phone in the movie theater, it is kinda disrespectful.
 
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AverageFC

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"says most of her friends are guys" = red flag number #2, a well rounded person will either have mostly friends of the same gender or have an equal amount of genders. a person who has a huge ego will not get along with someone of the same gender.
I knew that was a big red flag, but that ego thing didnt even occur to me. wow.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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