"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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What is harder? Playing a sport or picking up girls?

zekko

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This is what I feel about my life right now. Not that it's all bad, just feels like something important is missing (and trying to fill it with other things is just a temporary fix).
When I said that, you have to remember that I'm 49.
If you're a younger fellow, it's important that you not feel like a failure - you're still learning. That's what you're supposed to be doing. You have plenty of time to work things out, gain experiences, and become a man. Things got better for me as I got older.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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sandman6991

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You can't compare the two, but as far as sheer *difficulty*, playing a sport is definitiely harder. Any jackass can learn how to score a few bimbos, but it takes years of hard work and dedication to become really good at a sport.

And as far as the pain you get from girls being worse than in sports...what?! Since when does getting rejected by a girl compare to getting literally pounded? I've gotten rejected by girls a LOT and in about every way possible, and trust me, that hurts WAY less than going over the middle to catch a pass and getting a helmet in the chest from an opposing linebacker.
 

J. Darko

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sandman6991 said:
You can't compare the two, but as far as sheer *difficulty*, playing a sport is definitiely harder. Any jackass can learn how to score a few bimbos, but it takes years of hard work and dedication to become really good at a sport.

And as far as the pain you get from girls being worse than in sports...what?! Since when does getting rejected by a girl compare to getting literally pounded? I've gotten rejected by girls a LOT and in about every way possible, and trust me, that hurts WAY less than going over the middle to catch a pass and getting a helmet in the chest from an opposing linebacker.
Then what? You're lying on the ground, with a couple of bruises you get up and finish the game. All you have to endure is chest soreness for a couple of days. That's all.

If you are rejected by a girl however, it haunts you for the rest of your life, in your sleep, when you eat, when you take a shower, when you dream, a little voice tells you: sandman6991, keep telling yourself you are the prize, but you were rejected, again. Don't you see? It's obvious. you are not good enough. You are not attractive. Girls even think you're below those nerds they are dating, that's how unattractive you are, so you are going to marry a huge sperm whale or dy alone and masturbating forever.

Wish you were tackled by the linebacker now huh?
 

garruk

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i dont think you can compare these 2.

"playing" sports is easy. any 5 year old can play.
playing in the NFL? not easy

picking up girls is easy. any 5 year old can flirt with girls
being a true don juan? not easy
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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sandman6991

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J. Darko said:
Then what? You're lying on the ground, with a couple of bruises you get up and finish the game. All you have to endure is chest soreness for a couple of days. That's all.

If you are rejected by a girl however, it haunts you for the rest of your life, in your sleep, when you eat, when you take a shower, when you dream, a little voice tells you: sandman6991, keep telling yourself you are the prize, but you were rejected, again. Don't you see? It's obvious. you are not good enough. You are not attractive. Girls even think you're below those nerds they are dating, that's how unattractive you are, so you are going to marry a huge sperm whale or dy alone and masturbating forever.

Wish you were tackled by the linebacker now huh?
J. Darko, I've been tackled by that linebacker and I've been rejected by girls, and no, I still choose getting turned down by a woman anyday. (Although that doesn't change my love for football, the pain is part of what makes it special)

Getting rejected by a girl isn't going to trigger that ridiculous self-depreciating speech to myself. So, you're saying that when you're rejected by a girl that it haunts you for the rest of your life? That's just flat-out crazy. It pisses me off for about an hour or two if it's a girl I really liked, but I don't start questioning the very basis of my self-worth. Anyone who lets a rejection get to them like that, to the point of constant obsession, seriously needs to get help.

Obviously a break-up takes a little longer to get over than a normal rejection, but I would choose getting dumped over tearing my ACL again anyday.
 

J. Darko

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sandman6991 said:
J. Darko, I've been tackled by that linebacker and I've been rejected by girls, and no, I still choose getting turned down by a woman anyday. (Although that doesn't change my love for football, the pain is part of what makes it special)

Getting rejected by a girl isn't going to trigger that ridiculous self-depreciating speech to myself. So, you're saying that when you're rejected by a girl that it haunts you for the rest of your life? That's just flat-out crazy. It pisses me off for about an hour or two if it's a girl I really liked, but I don't start questioning the very basis of my self-worth. Anyone who lets a rejection get to them like that, to the point of constant obsession, seriously needs to get help.

Obviously a break-up takes a little longer to get over than a normal rejection, but I would choose getting dumped over tearing my ACL again anyday.
Guess you have a lot more confidence than me. :p And indeed, little compares to tearing a muscle.
 

Real Talk

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Warrior74 said:
Sounds like you've never done either if you have to ask. Apples and oranges.
This.

As a collegiate athlete I pretty much had a paranoia that if I ever took a day off from training, someone else was working their tail off that day to be better than me.

There really isnt an analog to this daily grind when it comes to girls. Even for an LTR the main reason that she is your LTR is because she makes your life better, not more stressful.
 

Plinco

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It is not comparable, women can be easier than scoring some point, but at least in sports you know what is expected of you.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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sandman6991

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J. Darko said:
Guess you have a lot more confidence than me. :p And indeed, little compares to tearing a muscle.
Haha I've just learned to not let stuff like that get me down too much...all I can do is learn from it and do better next time
 

Nygard

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I wish I could use my hockey approach to pickup : Skating fast and hitting the unsuspecting player with the shoulder.
 

kingsam

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J. Darko said:
If you are rejected by a girl however, it haunts you for the rest of your life, in your sleep, when you eat, when you take a shower, when you dream, a little voice tells you:
dude you have serious fuc.king issues if you take rejection that badly...
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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