"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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What if I want to call her?

Tictac

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I had a good woman in my life until the relationship cracked up at the end of 2011. It was a rough patch for both of us - she had lost her job and the relationship (then coming up on two years) was not the best but still okay.

She backed out of a couple of dates in the same week and I just vanished on her. After she made a couple of soft attempts to get in touch, I kept NC. And everything stopped. We had a couple of conversations over the last year and half-heartedly said something about getting together for a drink. But not so far.

I've been busy with work, my kids and a few other women (some amazing stories in fact). But in the end, I'd like to at least make a run at her or make sure there is nothing there - get her back in my life or make sure that that idea is dead.

No lectures about 'one-itis' please. I've had plenty of women since we split. I'd like to ask the 'grey hairs' here for their thoughts.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Slickster

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Bury the past

If she was meant to be in your life it would have happened already.
 

Stagger Lee

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If you feel like contacting her and seeing what might come of it then I think you should give it a try. I think you will soon enough get a good idea whether or not she's worth getting involved with again. If it doesn't work out to your liking then at least you'll know once and for all.

While usually trying to revive the past is unsucessful, it's not unheard of that relationships are successful rekindled. At least you'll remove any doubt.
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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WoodB

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You should call her. If you don't, it will pull on your conscience. No other way to find out where you both really stand. If she hems and haws, drop her like a hot potato. If she makes it easy for you, ask her out.
 

expos

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Ask her out - but have a back up plan (ie another woman). I know a lot of people are saying "ex's are ex's for a reason", but what worked once still has the ability to work again if two people are willing to make it work.
 

Scaramouche

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Dear Tic-Tac,
You were with this Lady for two years,a fair time to know each other,the dynamic didn't overwhelm either of you did it?....Why waste your time?to go back is just to revisit the reasons why you broke up,just move on,you have had a few interesting Ladies since and at your age the Demographic swings quite wildly in your direction,making it easier and easier to find talent...If you must insist on a trip down Memory Lane,then make sure she is kept as a Plate at best...So good luck Mate!
 

The Duke

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Tictac- every time I've tried to rekindle a past flame they never really went anywhere. I even tried to pay extra attention to detail and do things right. The relationship never got back to the level it once was. I have tried 3 times and failed each time.

I recommend that you try it just so you can learn, however realize what you are up against.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Alvafe

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up to you really, just remember why last time it didn't work and if that was a mildy thing no much problem, like some say just go check its nt like you will drop all other woman for this right?
 
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