"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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What do you guys do when you've given up?

corrector

Master Don Juan
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Kailex said:
Warrior, I'm pretty sure that means he still is.
I've seen women dance around an issue less than this.

And not that I am trying to be condescending but... you paid $7 to a hooker for 2 hugs?

I could have done that for $6.
You know, come to think of it, that hooker was a bad salesperson.

Let's assume that I am a virgin for the sake of arguement. Who is going to sell me the idea to have sex and attempt to make a profit on that? It's like selling ice to the eskamos, or sand to the Arabs.

A hooker is inside my car, trying to up-sell me from a hug for $ 5.00 to have full blown oral sex or vaginal sex with her, for $ 15.00 more (and she's not too bad looking, although not very hot), and she could not sell me to do that?

Usually sales people have to think of ways of handling objections. Like "don't worry, I don't have any STDs, and my leg is just shaking because I like you not because I'm a drug addict.", or "what you don't want to pay an additional $ 15.00 for a bare-back blow job right now, homo!". Or, "okay, you look like you really need to get laid, just give me the money and I'll take care of you." I remember one escort in the past told me that "it's the best $ 100 you'll spend in your life".
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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