What do you guys do when you've given up?

[Warrior74]

So here's my report for today (it's not too exciting). So like I said before I worked today. Turned out to be pretty busy so didn't have much time to socialize, did chat up a couple girls though.

First off was this cute asian girl. She came in with 2 guys and another girl. Originally thought it might be some kind of double date. Turned out not to be the case. We started chatting for a bit when she was asking me to recommend a drink (don't ask what we were talking about, can't really remember).

Second girl was this ok looking girl that came in with her fat friend. At the time it had slowed down a bit so I did have a bit of time to socialize. I wasn't really attracted to this girl so I didn't put much effort in and didn't even feel like # closing her.

Third girl actually started chatting me up. She was a french girl that was visiting my city with a group of people (she's french Canadian, not from France). She was one of the only ones out of her group that could speak much english. We basically just talked about why her group's visiting (sports competition), what she thinks of my city, etc etc. Not terribly exciting, but whatever. Don't bother # closing her because she's not even from my city.

And that pretty much sums up my work day. Rest of my customers were mostly guys drinking beer in the bar. Was a profitable day though, best one in some time there actually.

Now after work me and a couple other guys hit up a club. We ended up at a place I hadn't been to in about a year. I remember the place as being filled with hotties, so was kinda excited. Big let down, the place was a sausage fest. There was maybe 1 girl for every 2 guys. And maybe only half of them would be considered attractive. Place wasn't very busy either. But tried to make the best of it. Now, I suck at clubs, is not my scene at all. I actually find approaching at clubs very intimidating. Takes me a bit to get the nerve to approach. I did approach a few sets. First two I got the "Sorry, I have a boyfriend" line. Third sets just ignored me. The last set I actually had some guy try and c*ckblock me. Whatever, after an hour and a bit I just wasn't feeling it anymore. And couldn't find the guys I was with either (I think one of them left to hook up with some girl, no idea what happened to the other guy). So I just went home. And here I am typing this **** up after just getting in.

Now I don't know what the ****s wrong with me but I learned that I have a really hard time breaking out of my shell. Especially at places like clubs. Doubt there's much anyone on these boards can do to help me, I need extreme help. Don't know what I'm gonna do now.

First congrats man! You took action. You beat out about 99% of guys on this forum. You actually went out and tried something. That's an achieve worth celebrating! You should feel good about yourself just for that.

Second, don't down yourself. Like Ronnie Poleman said clubs can be daunting. And considering where you are at in your game, you did great man.

Third. Props for coming back and reporting on your action. It shows your serious about making some progress.

Fourth. Just slow your roll, your goal at this point is just to get comfortable talking to girls, don't worry about number closes and F closes, openers and all of that stuff. Just enjoy talking to people. The more you do it the better you will get. Remember, it takes time, nobody becomes anything over night.

Keep up the good work. Good luck.

 

[corrector]

If you do not like clubs, then it's better to just deal with random attractive women that you are casually passing by on the street or mall and say hi, or ask for directions or time.

If you are driving on your car, stop the girl and ask her for directions. (i.e. her bedroom, just kidding)

Or, just physically put yourself into the proximity of a girl and make a comment about something like you are talking to yourself, but loud enough that she could hear. That way she could might also say something herself.

Follow Warrior74's ATTITUDE about how success is defined so you'll see that everything you do beyond nothing is progressive.

The problem with the club scene is you can't hide behind your approach or feel anonymous. It sounds like you have no social proof and women are just seeing "who is this dork" when you come around them, so that sounds like a confidence killer if it reinforces that belief about yourself as some pathetic desperate virgin loser that couldn't get laid if his life depended on it rather than some smooth player who has plenty of options already and expects girls to give him their number as soon as he walks inside the room and dump the guys that are around them to be with you.

But with day-game, social courtesy is more likely to prevail as you could really be asking for directions, or be some normal nice guy that's not just out to get laid, and you could hide behind that.

 

[Scion]

I guess I'm just not patient with this stuff. I'd really like to lose my virginity (and no I'm not getting a hooker or looking for some disgusting fatties, just want a girl I find attractive) but since I have zero options right now it may just not happen. I'd like to get better quickly so I can just be normal.

 

[corrector]

I guess I'm just not patient with this stuff. I'd really like to lose my virginity (and no I'm not getting a hooker or looking for some disgusting fatties, just want a girl I find attractive) but since I have zero options right now it may just not happen. I'd like to get better quickly so I can just be normal.

But don't you think that this type of thinking is the problem itself. You have to be giving out some sort of desperate scarcity vibe that women are able to sniff out a mile away.

Look at what you are saying.
a) I am not normal right now.
b) It may just not happen.
c) I have zero options right now.
d) I need to get 'better', therefore something is wrong with me.

This sounds like you need CBT training, or you have to adjust this negative thinking pattern. Do you blame girls for your thoughts, or yourself? Who is in control of your mind?

Just with those four destructive thought patterns alone has to send out a scarcity, negative vibe out because you are seeking validation from women and that is not healthy. Do you try false time constraints at least?

The problem is you are relying too much on the outcome or response of a woman to determine your happiness and are investing too much on each outcome like it's a life and death struggle to lose your virginity. You need to take a chill pill and practise some positive affirmations.

1) I am an alpha male that's a brainwashed beta/omega male, I will free myself tonight.
2) I make things happen in my life because I am an alpha male.
3) I make my own options because I'm in control.
4) I am at the top of my game and can pull any girl I want.

Think about it. You are feeding yourself with this negative BS all the time. Work on your mind and what you are thinking and see if there is any change in results.

 

[Warrior74]

But don't you think that this type of thinking is the problem itself. You have to be giving out some sort of desperate scarcity vibe that women are able to sniff out a mile away.

Look at what you are saying.
a) I am not normal right now.
b) It may just not happen.
c) I have zero options right now.
d) I need to get 'better', therefore something is wrong with me.

This sounds like you need CBT training, or you have to adjust this negative thinking pattern. Do you blame girls for your thoughts, or yourself? Who is in control of your mind?

Just with those four destructive thought patterns alone has to send out a scarcity, negative vibe out because you are seeking validation from women and that is not healthy. Do you try false time constraints at least?

The problem is you are relying too much on the outcome or response of a woman to determine your happiness and are investing too much on each outcome like it's a life and death struggle to lose your virginity. You need to take a chill pill and practise some positive affirmations.

1) I am an alpha male that's a brainwashed beta/omega male, I will free myself tonight.
2) I make things happen in my life because I am an alpha male.
3) I make my own options because I'm in control.
4) I am at the top of my game and can pull any girl I want.

Think about it. You are feeding yourself with this negative BS all the time. Work on your mind and what you are thinking and see if there is any change in results.

This. You have a crappy negative outlook. And you're impatient. How long do you think therapy is going to take to fix these problems? I'm no expert, but I would imagine it wouldn't be a month or two. I'm sure it would be an involved process. There is no magic pill. There is no quick fix.

You want to lose your virginity....then put in some of this work I'm telling you about. You can't bench press 300 lbs overnight, and (starting from level one) you can't go bedding a bunch of women overnight.

You need to learn this exercise. Practice this for a whole day. Monitor your thoughts. Every time you have a negative thought or a positive thought make a note of it. Be AWARE of every thought and it's context. I would suggest taking a tablet and making a mark for each positive or negative thought but that might be too much. Still...the point is to give yourself an awareness of how many negative thoughts you give to yourself every day.

You ever heard the phrase, if you say something long enough people will believe it? Well what are you saying to yourself all day about you? And are you believing it?

Try that for the next few days, every time you have a negative thought, reframe it in a positive way and repeat it back to yourself. (not outloud, don't want people thinking your crazy right?) It takes time man. Give yourself a few months of hard work to get your head on straight and work past your insecurities. Be patient with yourself. Treat yourself the way you would treat an hb10 and treat her the way you'd treat yourself! lol. I kid, but seriously...treat yourself better man. You deserve it.

 

[Scion]

Yeah I know I'm impatient. However the thought that it could take months and months of effort to get good enough to bed a girl is kinda depressing, ya know? Especially because to some guys this is easy. Maybe that's why I haven't ever improved, I'd try for a month, go out every wknd, have nothing to show for it and just stop for awhile. I'd love there to be a easier way, and I'm sure even some success (maybe just bedding 1 girl) would boost me in the right direction. Well here starts a long journey I guess. Now reconsidering buying the car I want since if I get it I won't really have the time or money to go out a lot. F*ck!

 

[corrector]

Yeah I know I'm impatient. However the thought that it could take months and months of effort to get good enough to bed a girl is kinda depressing, ya know?

Sounds like you are desperate.

Then randomly ask attractive women if they want to have sex with you and read dbot's threads if you want to pursue corruption so desperately. Read his posts and his treads.

Just do it until you get comfortable knowing their answer is probably going to be no and nobody is going to call your bluff. Then before you know it, someone does. Then you have to find a place to do it. Then what will you do?

Ask and ye shall receive (from someone, not necessarily the first girl you ask)

Especially because to some guys this is easy. Maybe that's why I haven't ever improved, I'd try for a month, go out every wknd, have nothing to show for it and just stop for awhile. I'd love there to be a easier way, and I'm sure even some success (maybe just bedding 1 girl) would boost me in the right direction. Well here starts a long journey I guess. Now reconsidering buying the car I want since if I get it I won't really have the time or money to go out a lot. F*ck!

It is better to be as you are and not be a fornicator. So don't listen to the above advice I just gave, what I just told you about your thoughts, or about talking to 10 women a day. Believe me, the right woman will come your way when you least expect it and you'll save your virginity for her and hopefullly she'll be a virgin too.

Then if you fornicate, you'll likely want to do it again and then get upset when there is a dry spell because you know what you are missing. My Aunt is a nurse and says she deals with people who have AIDS, and recalls one suffer who is crying out for sex all the time. This can be addictive and destructive..yeah, so you are subconciously resisting it -- you know it's wrong. Just walk and consider yourself lucky not to be in corruption.

 

[Scion]

I honestly doubt I'll ever find a girl that's a virgin, most girls have sex by the time they are 18 (most even younger than that). I'm not really desperate but have really gotten tired of waiting to experience sex.

 

[corrector]

I honestly doubt I'll ever find a girl that's a virgin, most girls have sex by the time they are 18 (most even younger than that). I'm not really desperate but have really gotten tired of waiting to experience sex.

Okay, lets look at the bright side. You do not have AIDS, herpes, or any STD. If you go with a girl, even condoms aren't foolproof and you could catch something. Then there is the other aspect that you'll probably want to have sex again because you know what you are missing, so if you didn't catch it the first time, eventually you will.

This is why sex is best inside a marriage because then you will know you will be getting it again, and, and again. Look at how sad Maxtro is, for example. He's not a virgin and experienced sex....so what...the way he posts, he may as well be one.

 

[Warrior74]

Okay, lets look at the bright side. You do not have AIDS, herpes, or any STD. If you go with a girl, even condoms aren't foolproof and you could catch something. Then there is the other aspect that you'll probably want to have sex again because you know what you are missing, so if you didn't catch it the first time, eventually you will.

This is why sex is best inside a marriage because then you will know you will be getting it again, and, and again. Look at how sad Maxtro is, for example. He's not a virgin and experienced sex....so what...the way he posts, he may as well be one.

This guy pays hookers for hugs. Seriously corrector? What the hell is that about? Are you a virgin man? You sound deathly afraid of sex.

 

[corrector]

This guy pays hookers for hugs. Seriously corrector? What the hell is that about? Are you a virgin man? You sound deathly afraid of sex.

I have hugged quite a number of women both before and after that incident. and I don't need to pay to hug a woman. When I say incident, that is the only time I allowed a hooker into my car in my life. So, when you say hookers, that is not true since I've never allowed more than one.

I think everyone at one point would think, gee, I wonder what it's like to go up to a hooker and pretend I'm lost and ask her for directions. Or, even let a hooker go into their car and see how far they would go within their boundaries. I maintained my boundaries and made sure nothing happened further than a hug. This is what I call "self-control". I also wanted to be extra nice with this hooker, hug her, pay her a bit of money, so she doesn't go psycho on me when I rejected her for sex and didn't want to pay her $ 20.00, and paid her $ 7.00 instead for 2 hugs to keep her happy that she got something.

There is no way that I would risk catching any STD with that STD infested woman. I studied that saliva from her mouth could go into the membrane in my penis and an STD could pass from her by oral sex. It's not likely but possible. A $ 20.00 blow-job without a condom wasn't worth it with me, or she was prepared to **** me for $ 20.00, again, not worth it either. She could have AIDS and her legs were shaking. I asked her "why are your legs shaking?", she claimed they weren't. Obviously she was looking for a fix.

So you want to ask me what's the deal with not having unprotected oral sex or vaginal sex with this hooker? That is just stupid. With me, fornication is sin. I don't have to be deathly afraid of it, but realize it for what it is...bait and trap. STD's for sale, $ 20.00, all you can handle.

 

[Scion]

Um wow corrector, why are you on this forum if you think sex is a sin? And btw, not everyone's thought about picking up a hooker for hugs.

 

[corrector]

Um wow corrector, why are you on this forum if you think sex is a sin? And btw, not everyone's thought about picking up a hooker for hugs.

Who said I'm on this forum? I am a ghost, maybe a concept, that appears on some threads. Just because I'm posting here doesn't mean I'm on this forum, or believe in anything about this forum.

It appeared that I tested my boundaries picking up a hooker. A hug was as far as I could go. That is good to know.

 

[Warrior74]

corrector. Are you a virgin?

 

[omega05]

you paid a hooker for a hug? what part of the game is that?

 

[corrector]

you paid a hooker for a hug? what part of the game is that?

I think hookers are fascinating. I look at JohnTV and enjoy watching Brian Bates nab would be johns from his lookout in Oklahoma. I've studied all documentaries about prostitutes, sex traffic, sex tourism that exist on youtube and on the internet.

It is not a surprize, with the level of studying that I have done about prostitutes, not to mention mastubation on internet escort ads, it is no surprize to me that I would eventually go up to one and try to talk to her, allow her to come into my car when she convinced me she only wanted to sell a good time and not rob and kill me or something, and hug her, at least just once.

The thing is, I'm still interested in studying documentaries about prostitutes. Just the other day, I studied brothels in Tel Aviv Israel, then looked at escort sites in Tel Aviv and masturbated on them. Some of the hottest looking girls are in Tel Aviv. After years and years of studying, you'd think that there would be a run out of documentaries or information about prostitutes.

They are good for being studied, I was shocked when I actually went that close to using one.

Okay, back to the regularly scheduled program. Scion or whoever wrote this thread is who should be on the spotlight.

 

[Warrior74]

I see you didn't respond to my question and want to shift the spotlight back on the original poster. Very telling. I think we all have an understanding of who and what you are by your answers and non answers. Back to our regularly scheduled programming of actually helping a person with the problem the asked for help on instead injecting random tangents.

 

[corrector]

I see you didn't respond to my question and want to shift the spotlight back on the original poster. Very telling. I think we all have an understanding of who and what you are by your answers and non answers. Back to our regularly scheduled programming of actually helping a person with the problem the asked for help on instead injecting random tangents.

Why should I respond to your game-plan? Virgin, not virgin. Okay, I'm not a virgin. Maybe I am. Maybe both, or neither. Maybe I had sex with my babysitter when I was a kid, or one of my school-teachers. Yeah, now I'm big cool non-virgin stud here ready to give advice. Or, maybe you are right, I'm a virgin. Gee, that's a good question, I really don't know.

I think the hooker and hugs experience is much better on the ratings, don't you think? People can't believe a guy would is obessed with hookers would pick up a hooker just to hug her.

Now, back to our regularly scheduled program.

 

[Kailex]

Why should I respond to your game-plan? Virgin, not virgin. Okay, I'm not a virgin. Maybe I am. Maybe both, or neither. Maybe I had sex with my babysitter when I was a kid, or one of my school-teachers. Yeah, now I'm big cool non-virgin stud here ready to give advice. Or, maybe you are right, I'm a virgin. Gee, that's a good question, I really don't know.

I think the hooker and hugs experience is much better on the ratings, don't you think? People can't believe a guy would is obessed with hookers would pick up a hooker just to hug her.

Now, back to our regularly scheduled program.

Warrior, I'm pretty sure that means he still is.
I've seen women dance around an issue less than this.

And not that I am trying to be condescending but... you paid $7 to a hooker for 2 hugs?

I could have done that for $6.

 

[Scion]

Well looks like my concerns about not having money to go out all the time are resolved, not getting that car I really wanted. F*cking ****, really liked that car too. Guess I get to take the bus for a while longer.

Oh and my question for this thread was answered, no point in any further discussion.